Day 5,
Fuck, dude. (in a good way, but not a great way).
To start, I've been feeling at least a bit anxious through most of today. While talking with patients or their family members, I felt awkward and not secure in myself.
I also adjusted a type of goals list that I've used in a half-assed way.
It comes from the book/audiobook 'It Works!'
The core of it is to write and carry around a list of things you would like to have. Check the list three times daily, and think about the items on your list. I add a brief visualization for these points throughout my day and feel as though I've achieved them.
What I did differently; instead of writing out the absolute end state of something - EXAMPLE: I'm a deca-millionaire who speaks ten languages and fucks 10 Victoria Secret's models a day - I figured that I would list out my goals as fun milestones that my unconscious would not fight.
Things that are a bit 'out there' but not so unrealistic that I have to fight with myself to visualize it.
Here's how I arranged it:
30 days: cool things, but not outrageous
90 days: Things that would happen once a year to once every five years.
120 days: Once a decade goals (down payment, new car)
I'll adjust as needed, but it's all about creating what my mind will allow.
ANYWAYS, my 30 day goals include:
- Getting hired in tech; (I once got hired in 7 days after making that decision)
- Finishing a C# / ASP.NET project
- Finishing a digital project
AND...
... A hot blonde with big tits letting me fuck her tits.
I've done titty fucking on a couple of occasions, and it was always awesome.
The problem is that I can never find women with big enough tits to try it.
And so, as a man of his word, I would visualize myself with big luscious soft bosoms wrapping themselves around my member, with blonde hair bouncing, its tits grazing my abdomen from the motions; I would hold this image in my head a few times per day.
So I'm shopping in Walmart, and I'm on my way out.
And I see this good looking blonde woman - coordinating yoga outfit, low cut shirt, and nice big (fake) tits.
When I tell you that I wanted to shoot my shot, I really did.
But I had the reverse issue from how I normally go about approaching:
Normally, my body wants me to approach, and my mind fights me about timing, or people around that could hear; eventually, I pick the right time and introduce myself.
This time, I became super anxious and nervous.
My mind was thinking "you've got to do this!", and I was psyching myself up, but then I looked at her hand, reaching for produce, and I thought(?) that I saw some kind of ring on her hand.
Then my mind went "nah, it's good, nevermind".
I'm kicking myself.
Feels like some sort of sign. Still feel crazy anxious and regretful about it.
I'm running loops of OF as we speak.
Next time, I'm pouncing.
Sorry guys if my story was underwhelming.
It Works (Audiobook): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uOZbtlbjR1U
Extra advice to making it work for you: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3-WRu5tGsOA
Fuck, dude. (in a good way, but not a great way).
To start, I've been feeling at least a bit anxious through most of today. While talking with patients or their family members, I felt awkward and not secure in myself.
I also adjusted a type of goals list that I've used in a half-assed way.
It comes from the book/audiobook 'It Works!'
The core of it is to write and carry around a list of things you would like to have. Check the list three times daily, and think about the items on your list. I add a brief visualization for these points throughout my day and feel as though I've achieved them.
What I did differently; instead of writing out the absolute end state of something - EXAMPLE: I'm a deca-millionaire who speaks ten languages and fucks 10 Victoria Secret's models a day - I figured that I would list out my goals as fun milestones that my unconscious would not fight.
Things that are a bit 'out there' but not so unrealistic that I have to fight with myself to visualize it.
Here's how I arranged it:
30 days: cool things, but not outrageous
90 days: Things that would happen once a year to once every five years.
120 days: Once a decade goals (down payment, new car)
I'll adjust as needed, but it's all about creating what my mind will allow.
ANYWAYS, my 30 day goals include:
- Getting hired in tech; (I once got hired in 7 days after making that decision)
- Finishing a C# / ASP.NET project
- Finishing a digital project
AND...
... A hot blonde with big tits letting me fuck her tits.
I've done titty fucking on a couple of occasions, and it was always awesome.
The problem is that I can never find women with big enough tits to try it.
And so, as a man of his word, I would visualize myself with big luscious soft bosoms wrapping themselves around my member, with blonde hair bouncing, its tits grazing my abdomen from the motions; I would hold this image in my head a few times per day.
So I'm shopping in Walmart, and I'm on my way out.
And I see this good looking blonde woman - coordinating yoga outfit, low cut shirt, and nice big (fake) tits.
When I tell you that I wanted to shoot my shot, I really did.
But I had the reverse issue from how I normally go about approaching:
Normally, my body wants me to approach, and my mind fights me about timing, or people around that could hear; eventually, I pick the right time and introduce myself.
This time, I became super anxious and nervous.
My mind was thinking "you've got to do this!", and I was psyching myself up, but then I looked at her hand, reaching for produce, and I thought(?) that I saw some kind of ring on her hand.
Then my mind went "nah, it's good, nevermind".
I'm kicking myself.
Feels like some sort of sign. Still feel crazy anxious and regretful about it.
I'm running loops of OF as we speak.
Next time, I'm pouncing.
Sorry guys if my story was underwhelming.
It Works (Audiobook): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uOZbtlbjR1U
Extra advice to making it work for you: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3-WRu5tGsOA
UMS v2 Journal (current) || Overcoming Fear 5.75G Journal
