07-10-2021, 01:10 AM
Day 52/180 ON #1- Fri 9 July - *(First day using 4 loops)* - part 2
so firstly I had asked @Shannon a question and the answer can be found here: https://subliminal-talk.com/Thread-Shann...#pid247005
Secondly as per that post above, I am now typing this update during my 5min breaks, so this wont be posted until its done which could take a while at this rate lol
5) So yesterday was productive again. I was able to get on with things I had added to my paper time blocking and it really helped me to manage things I normally wouldnt and also it helped curb my procrastination. Even when i felt I was getting dragged away with too much fun the thought to get back to my schedule kicked in. At the same time have the timer on my normal clock app that came with the phone beep at 5mins and 10mins enabled me to stay in focus and sometimes when i was doing anything mentally taxing (such as learning something new online that could help me with studies) I felt myself crave a break and I knew that with 10mins it wasnt too far in coming to that break.
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Day 53/180 ON #2- Sat 10 July - *(second day using 4 loops)*
1) I got to bed for 11.30pm again and unsure when i finally fell asleep but managed to get out of bed at 9.30am! still terrific for me even if late so hooray!
2) More about the sleep - so I woke around 4 times during the night at least. The sleep was thus volatile in some ways. I recall having 4 dreams lol but I dont remember any of them sadly.
Is 4 dreams the sub or me i dont know.
Waking up was a real struggle today though!! - so my 5mins is over but ill get this done as in this hour (12pm-1pm) I have some physical chores to do so I can start those a little later than scheduled as i wont be timing that with 10mins on n 5min off.
So yeah waking up was a struggle! Even with the alarm going off from 8am it wasnt easy this time to wake up. I have 2 phones and set alarms on both. 1 phone plays the sub also at night. I forgot to set the alarm on this sub phone last night even though I thought I had before going to sleep so maybe that not ringing played a part in this but either way waking up wasnt easy.
I therefore woke up a little later than i have been and than I have had planned. So rather than 9am, waking latest at 9.20ish I woke at 9.30am
3) This however got me focused very quickly as I knew I had to get on track with my time blocking plan or id fall behind since I have a delivery from the supermarket coming later which means 2 hours blocked away to clean/disinfect etc.
4) In this time ive managed to have breakfast and then get on with some work whilst using the 5mins break to send off an email that came to my mind today and then to get on here and reply to shannon's reply to me (which I need to go back into and add on that I had 4 dreams as that may be relevant) and then to get on here and update this journal.
5) Feelings wise I felt yesterday and today a little stress and fear. let me explain. so my friend who has had depression in the past and is a worrier messaged me telling me he had heard the next exam would be harder and rules have changed etc. At first I got a little stressed and panicked but then thought na Im not dealing with his negative energy yet and continued with my time blocking plan. When in the shower I then realised I was calm and my mind had rationalised that even if the exam is harder so what, we do have resit opportunities again anyway.
Todays stress and fear was minor and something that is clear to me. In that whenever I come to a point in trying to understand something that I find hard to understand (such as in academia) this stresses me out. its not easy thus it causes me stress. In the same way when I lose something and cant find it, or something isnt working as it should be then I feel the stress inside me build up, I start getting hot, sweating and itchy even in sensation.
Today even though whilst learning I had this stress begin I felt it fade away as I again rationalised that I should take it easy and just understand it slowly and gradually and to chill! lol
so firstly I had asked @Shannon a question and the answer can be found here: https://subliminal-talk.com/Thread-Shann...#pid247005
Secondly as per that post above, I am now typing this update during my 5min breaks, so this wont be posted until its done which could take a while at this rate lol
5) So yesterday was productive again. I was able to get on with things I had added to my paper time blocking and it really helped me to manage things I normally wouldnt and also it helped curb my procrastination. Even when i felt I was getting dragged away with too much fun the thought to get back to my schedule kicked in. At the same time have the timer on my normal clock app that came with the phone beep at 5mins and 10mins enabled me to stay in focus and sometimes when i was doing anything mentally taxing (such as learning something new online that could help me with studies) I felt myself crave a break and I knew that with 10mins it wasnt too far in coming to that break.
----
Day 53/180 ON #2- Sat 10 July - *(second day using 4 loops)*
1) I got to bed for 11.30pm again and unsure when i finally fell asleep but managed to get out of bed at 9.30am! still terrific for me even if late so hooray!
2) More about the sleep - so I woke around 4 times during the night at least. The sleep was thus volatile in some ways. I recall having 4 dreams lol but I dont remember any of them sadly.
Is 4 dreams the sub or me i dont know.
Waking up was a real struggle today though!! - so my 5mins is over but ill get this done as in this hour (12pm-1pm) I have some physical chores to do so I can start those a little later than scheduled as i wont be timing that with 10mins on n 5min off.
So yeah waking up was a struggle! Even with the alarm going off from 8am it wasnt easy this time to wake up. I have 2 phones and set alarms on both. 1 phone plays the sub also at night. I forgot to set the alarm on this sub phone last night even though I thought I had before going to sleep so maybe that not ringing played a part in this but either way waking up wasnt easy.
I therefore woke up a little later than i have been and than I have had planned. So rather than 9am, waking latest at 9.20ish I woke at 9.30am
3) This however got me focused very quickly as I knew I had to get on track with my time blocking plan or id fall behind since I have a delivery from the supermarket coming later which means 2 hours blocked away to clean/disinfect etc.
4) In this time ive managed to have breakfast and then get on with some work whilst using the 5mins break to send off an email that came to my mind today and then to get on here and reply to shannon's reply to me (which I need to go back into and add on that I had 4 dreams as that may be relevant) and then to get on here and update this journal.
5) Feelings wise I felt yesterday and today a little stress and fear. let me explain. so my friend who has had depression in the past and is a worrier messaged me telling me he had heard the next exam would be harder and rules have changed etc. At first I got a little stressed and panicked but then thought na Im not dealing with his negative energy yet and continued with my time blocking plan. When in the shower I then realised I was calm and my mind had rationalised that even if the exam is harder so what, we do have resit opportunities again anyway.
Todays stress and fear was minor and something that is clear to me. In that whenever I come to a point in trying to understand something that I find hard to understand (such as in academia) this stresses me out. its not easy thus it causes me stress. In the same way when I lose something and cant find it, or something isnt working as it should be then I feel the stress inside me build up, I start getting hot, sweating and itchy even in sensation.
Today even though whilst learning I had this stress begin I felt it fade away as I again rationalised that I should take it easy and just understand it slowly and gradually and to chill! lol
OF3 5.75.7G 13/15Vol
1L-2O/3OF; (1L-2/2 5/6); (2L 19/6); (3L 27/6); (4L 9/7); (H4L 25/7)
W 19 May
MLS 5.5G: ≈70days x2, IYGSH: 54, E2: 78+48, DMSI 3.2: 56 & 22, UMOP1: 57+UMOP2: 33 = 90+10 US v12/15=100, OF: 45, OF2: 56days
1L-2O/3OF; (1L-2/2 5/6); (2L 19/6); (3L 27/6); (4L 9/7); (H4L 25/7)
W 19 May
MLS 5.5G: ≈70days x2, IYGSH: 54, E2: 78+48, DMSI 3.2: 56 & 22, UMOP1: 57+UMOP2: 33 = 90+10 US v12/15=100, OF: 45, OF2: 56days