Back From The Living - Restarting [AM] by LionMonkey

[LionMonkey]

[AM Stage 1 - Day 9] – Hunger Is Missing

What up!

Just came back from partying in one of the hippest open bar area. 

100's of people everywhere, music playing.

I've decided to switch over to WM as AM isn't really what I seek to cultivate right now.

I feel I'm pretty Alpha and it's great BUT

My motivation to meet chicks isn't there!!

I saw 50-100 beautiful, slim, young girls and yet I didn't feel anything 90% of the time. 

I know these kinds of girls are what I would like to have sexual relationships with.

But my body is like, totally blasé.. like an empty void.

And that made it into a thing of "why would I talk to them".

Intellectually I know I could only settle with a girl like that but emotionally I'm empty.

I felt content and good in myself but girls will very rarely approach you.

So it's a looose loose.

Even though I notice girls attracted to me.

Or 3/4 girls I met were receptive and open to meet me.

And 1 of them was a stunner with a "less attractive" friend.

She actually approached me asking if I was standing in the queue waiting to order drinks.

But I was like 10 feet from the person in front so I took it as a sign of her wanting to engage.

A slim, beautiful, model-looking blonde and her fat friend.

She was cool and we could talk on similar wavelength about different topics.

I still couldn't even push that interaction with her after she got led away by her friend.

The stunners are who I want to date. I feel they are actually cooler to talk to, more interesting conversation and a good balance between a fat girls personality and a model girls looks.

The challenge with them are

1) Motivation to push for the interaction while remaining cool
2) Their "less attractive" friend, usually wants to take her away. Although it wasn't a big problem in the past when I was a beeeeeeaast!
3) Other guys interfering

My number One thing has always been 1) 

Being hungry enough to go for it wherever I am and at any time out socializing.

Also I feel when some of the cute and lovely girls ask me if they can pass or the stunner if I was in queue - I feel nothing. 

In the past I would feel good and be like really happy when a cute and beautiful girl asks me that nicely.

I would feel joy. Which in hindsight I now see was a good quality. I don't know why I feel blasé now. 

Experience and age might have something to do with it? 

I don't know.

What I do know is, I actually really like and appreciate some of these beauties but it's like there's a disconnect from what my mind and soul knows vs. what my body is responding with.

Anyway...

Based on those things, I've decided to switch to WM as I believe it will be in more alignment with what I want.

Let me know if you have more experience using AM and WM, tell me your thoughts.

The plan is to keep AM for total of 14 days and then switch to WM.

Hope you keep staying hungry!!

Bc once you feel how comfortable it is when you are full all the time, it's a hard challenge to become hungry again...

Talk to you soon!

-LM