Wednesday 19th May 2021 - Day 1
I downloaded OF v3 to may laptop, to my s10 phone and also to my s7 edge old phone.
I plan to use the S7 phone to play through the speakers once im back at uni in my apartment there.
However I then just decided to play using my s7 edge phone.
As soon as I hit play which must have been around 5am or 6am UK time, I put my head on the pillow and felt so many thoughts run through my mind. Im not sure if this was placebo or the sub but I had negative thoughts, more as if I was hearing my parents shout at me when they were scared which would scare me but anyway the point is had this then fell asleep. - (I want to be clear, I hit play, put the phone down, put my head down and boom the thoughts started).
I woke tired, pretty tired and groggy as we say here in the UK and then realised I felt as if I needed more sleep.
During the day this tiredness went and I felt great and normal and relaxed as I usually do.
I have today felt regret and fear. Regret at how ive not done alot all my adult life and reached my potential and fear at how little life I have left and what will I do or achieve.
Other than this I then decided ok if I can ill jump on and update my journal which im now doing and i will then update my signature to state the date I started this sub.
Time is now 4.33am on Thurs 20 May, so soon enough Ill play the sub again but this time with the s10 phone, lets see if that makes a difference and it shall be 13/15 volume.
Ive quickly scanned that some are listening to this sub for the full hour with headphones so I may see if I can incorporate that into my regime when im back at uni; I cant fit that in here at home right now.
ps: I Dont know at all if this is relevant, but today I spent most of my day discussing how id love to get my dream sports car once I graduate. been discussing it with family and then if not that expensive car (with familys help ofcourse) then a cheaper more regular car for when I start work. The dream sports car is a car I want to have to then use as my babe magnet too if I can but also for my own pride.
i saw a used one in a beautiful red colour, and yellow colour, both bright cars shouting out "hey look at me". I showed my sister and she said im brave as it will draw lots of attention towards me. Now I didnt understand so I asked her to explain and she said well she wouldnt feel like she would want people looking at her especially during a bad hair day etc and I said well maybe its cos our personalities differ since I clearly want to make a loud statement that look at me ladies and gentleman... ive arrived.
This could be me or it could be the sub, I dont know but sharing for now.
I downloaded OF v3 to may laptop, to my s10 phone and also to my s7 edge old phone.
I plan to use the S7 phone to play through the speakers once im back at uni in my apartment there.
However I then just decided to play using my s7 edge phone.
As soon as I hit play which must have been around 5am or 6am UK time, I put my head on the pillow and felt so many thoughts run through my mind. Im not sure if this was placebo or the sub but I had negative thoughts, more as if I was hearing my parents shout at me when they were scared which would scare me but anyway the point is had this then fell asleep. - (I want to be clear, I hit play, put the phone down, put my head down and boom the thoughts started).
I woke tired, pretty tired and groggy as we say here in the UK and then realised I felt as if I needed more sleep.
During the day this tiredness went and I felt great and normal and relaxed as I usually do.
I have today felt regret and fear. Regret at how ive not done alot all my adult life and reached my potential and fear at how little life I have left and what will I do or achieve.
Other than this I then decided ok if I can ill jump on and update my journal which im now doing and i will then update my signature to state the date I started this sub.
Time is now 4.33am on Thurs 20 May, so soon enough Ill play the sub again but this time with the s10 phone, lets see if that makes a difference and it shall be 13/15 volume.
Ive quickly scanned that some are listening to this sub for the full hour with headphones so I may see if I can incorporate that into my regime when im back at uni; I cant fit that in here at home right now.
ps: I Dont know at all if this is relevant, but today I spent most of my day discussing how id love to get my dream sports car once I graduate. been discussing it with family and then if not that expensive car (with familys help ofcourse) then a cheaper more regular car for when I start work. The dream sports car is a car I want to have to then use as my babe magnet too if I can but also for my own pride.
i saw a used one in a beautiful red colour, and yellow colour, both bright cars shouting out "hey look at me". I showed my sister and she said im brave as it will draw lots of attention towards me. Now I didnt understand so I asked her to explain and she said well she wouldnt feel like she would want people looking at her especially during a bad hair day etc and I said well maybe its cos our personalities differ since I clearly want to make a loud statement that look at me ladies and gentleman... ive arrived.
This could be me or it could be the sub, I dont know but sharing for now.
OF3 5.75.7G 13/15Vol
1L-2O/3OF; (1L-2/2 5/6); (2L 19/6); (3L 27/6); (4L 9/7); (H4L 25/7)
W 19 May
MLS 5.5G: ≈70days x2, IYGSH: 54, E2: 78+48, DMSI 3.2: 56 & 22, UMOP1: 57+UMOP2: 33 = 90+10 US v12/15=100, OF: 45, OF2: 56days
1L-2O/3OF; (1L-2/2 5/6); (2L 19/6); (3L 27/6); (4L 9/7); (H4L 25/7)
W 19 May
MLS 5.5G: ≈70days x2, IYGSH: 54, E2: 78+48, DMSI 3.2: 56 & 22, UMOP1: 57+UMOP2: 33 = 90+10 US v12/15=100, OF: 45, OF2: 56days
