Decided to just start up the absolute self confidence sub now. I couldn't wait any longer. I really want to run through alpha 2011 again, but I think I'm going to hold off on it. Right now I do have money to purchase alpha 5.0, but it's more of my savings I've held onto. I could buy it and then go through it, but I've got a different plan of action. I'm going to be listening to absolute self confidence to give me that push I so desperately need to get started.
So plan of action so far. Finding a job, but not some meaningless cashiering job. I'm just keeping an eye out for something that's relevant to my field in computers, but even if I find something else I'll be happy. I just can't stand cashiering, it's just too much interaction with people. So if I have a bad day where I'm feeling irritable or just want to keep to myself I have to deal with the non-stop interactions. I just need something I can tolerate and hopefully start moving towards becoming independent because right now I still live at home and it's killing me. I'm 21 and whenever I see other people my age getting out there and being independent I get depressed. I feel so damn helpless sometimes and I hate it. Anyway my reward for getting a job will be alpha 5.0.
I've also been thinking about the remove negativity within subliminal. I just don't know how much of an impact it made on me, it's really subtle. When I look at what I need to improve on it makes me realize that maybe removing negativity inside of me wasn't really going to give me what I needed. So hopefully I'll notice some more noticeable changes from absolute self confidence. I've got it playing right now and I can definitely feel different from it.
Also I've noticed a general feeling of being unworthy because of my anxiety issues. I tend to see myself as less than others because I have trouble in life. Especially with women, I just feel so undeserving of love. I just think this has less to do with negativity inside of me and more like negativity being created due to an already existing problem.
So plan of action so far. Finding a job, but not some meaningless cashiering job. I'm just keeping an eye out for something that's relevant to my field in computers, but even if I find something else I'll be happy. I just can't stand cashiering, it's just too much interaction with people. So if I have a bad day where I'm feeling irritable or just want to keep to myself I have to deal with the non-stop interactions. I just need something I can tolerate and hopefully start moving towards becoming independent because right now I still live at home and it's killing me. I'm 21 and whenever I see other people my age getting out there and being independent I get depressed. I feel so damn helpless sometimes and I hate it. Anyway my reward for getting a job will be alpha 5.0.
I've also been thinking about the remove negativity within subliminal. I just don't know how much of an impact it made on me, it's really subtle. When I look at what I need to improve on it makes me realize that maybe removing negativity inside of me wasn't really going to give me what I needed. So hopefully I'll notice some more noticeable changes from absolute self confidence. I've got it playing right now and I can definitely feel different from it.
Also I've noticed a general feeling of being unworthy because of my anxiety issues. I tend to see myself as less than others because I have trouble in life. Especially with women, I just feel so undeserving of love. I just think this has less to do with negativity inside of me and more like negativity being created due to an already existing problem.
