09-24-2020, 05:37 AM
Third Cycle Day 2 - Feeling even less anxious. Almost more determined weirdly enough. Quite a bit of regret as well over bad decisions. Hopefully one of these days I will learn not to engage in conversation people who insist on wasting my time. I honestly think I am also learning to accept a lot of things that I would usually ignore or blow off previously. I am just very much hitting that point where I don't see the reason to cause unnecessary problems or headaches by doing something or wanting something for silly reasons. For example say I want to learn a martial art. Do I really want to go somewhere all the time and hang out with what most likely will be a lot of sweaty guys yelling at each other or doing a lot of technical hugging if it was say juijitsu? Definitely not. I now understand on an emotional level that yeah something may seem really cool but I have to really look at the trade offs. Something I haven't done in the past much to my detriment
