10-12-2019, 08:58 AM
My mood during this week's loops, until today, has leaned toward depressed, irritable, stressed, and angry. Yesterday was the worst of it - it felt like how I felt after the first few weeks of USLM 4.x and DMSI 3.1. I thought, "Here we go again." It felt like a chemically-induced depression, and oppressive. Lots of negative thoughts (movie quote of the day: "All I have...are negative thoughts.") and a few crying spells (mostly sentimental about my kids). I had thoughts of wanting to drink to mask it, but somewhat easily averted that and didn't drink any alcohol.
Today, no issues. Loops last night must have helped to break through something. Not sure what, just yet. Feeling relieved about that. I've also had some instances of trancing-out, and perhaps just a titch of morphine-drip (for the first time on this version).
Wife says I've been snoring while sleeping lately - more than usual. Usually it's only when I have a sinus issue or have been drinking alcohol. Perhaps I'm extremely relaxed while listening to loops, and it's affecting my airway like drinking alcohol would.
Something else, lately - wife's been getting baby fever. She's been "joking" about wanting another baby for awhile - something we agreed we weren't going to do (have a third child). Suddenly she's been putting on the full court press. Even so, still no sex. Wife's under considerable stresses lately, and whatever is being communicated through my DMSI aura is not overcoming it, so far.
We'll see what happens by Day 36. I figure 3 full rounds of loops & bloom should be a decent point to evaluate the efficacy of this version. Still planning a full 90 day run.
Today, no issues. Loops last night must have helped to break through something. Not sure what, just yet. Feeling relieved about that. I've also had some instances of trancing-out, and perhaps just a titch of morphine-drip (for the first time on this version).
Wife says I've been snoring while sleeping lately - more than usual. Usually it's only when I have a sinus issue or have been drinking alcohol. Perhaps I'm extremely relaxed while listening to loops, and it's affecting my airway like drinking alcohol would.
Something else, lately - wife's been getting baby fever. She's been "joking" about wanting another baby for awhile - something we agreed we weren't going to do (have a third child). Suddenly she's been putting on the full court press. Even so, still no sex. Wife's under considerable stresses lately, and whatever is being communicated through my DMSI aura is not overcoming it, so far.
We'll see what happens by Day 36. I figure 3 full rounds of loops & bloom should be a decent point to evaluate the efficacy of this version. Still planning a full 90 day run.
