06-22-2012, 11:47 AM
I'm going to post part of a pm I sent to Spiral
My dad has been in contact with me after 4 years of not speaking and is basically trying to take away 1 millions dollars and my home lol and I also just fractured my ankle. This is a rough year indeed..a very transitional one and it seems like a lot of us are in a bit of a bardo state. I do indeed have to re-evaluate some priorities..getting the results I wanted with woman so consistently and suddenly left me realizing that my sole my focus, or rather the largest driving factor, in some form or another has been to get to that level and when I actually had it I was like sweet this is all there is do lol. I switched to stage 3 alpha and the freedom and confidence I experience from it is fantastic but having a life filled with sexy gorgeous woman and being the kind of man who is their fantasy seems unshakably a primer motivator in my life. I kept wanting only to keep feeding that...sure enough I started expecting...and expectation leads to disappointment..and frustration. I've starting losing track and getting caught up in whats not working rather than what is. I can't help but get results anymore because I know where to focus and my core mindset and physiologically has been forever changed..my experience and lack of mind bs makes it easy.I just love that kind of love in my life.
two nights ago after after I hurt my foot playing basketball and then I stopped because I couldn't hobble any longer, I was sitting on a stoop and a sexy cougar literally seduced me right off the street. I was minding my own business texting she gets out of a cab and comes sits next to me and next thing I know after 2 hours of buying me drinks and making out she tells me she wants to bring me home and then..... she just bails when I go to the bathroom lol. The bartender said she had an early morning..I got super angry then started laughing because who cares I'm grateful that kind of stuff happens anyway but pissed this theme of nothing sticking is really showing up.The theme has been change..change..I can't control anything..ever...no security lol Those are my lessons until I make something more substantial in my life.
Anyway I am running Alpha stage 3 for a refresher now for 2-3 weeks and then a week of stage 6. with either winners mindset/everything is possible/or overcome self sabotage-have not decided yet. Then will be doing WM 4g with a different set every stage. Including ultra success 3g, ASC, gratitude, RNW, Extreme self esteem, and possibly carepe diem or seek the challenge.
I'm really enjoying alpha again and how it always de-fixes this myopic focus I have in life but on the other hand there is just something that feels really off with it..this was the case as well running it the first time. Its like all my motives comes from my mind instead of my heart or gut on it. I am also definitely being aware of certain things that are bothering me again and after feeling so ego-less and carefree it is very strange...its like I have been cast out of the palace of my own life to walk the warriors way again lol.
My dad has been in contact with me after 4 years of not speaking and is basically trying to take away 1 millions dollars and my home lol and I also just fractured my ankle. This is a rough year indeed..a very transitional one and it seems like a lot of us are in a bit of a bardo state. I do indeed have to re-evaluate some priorities..getting the results I wanted with woman so consistently and suddenly left me realizing that my sole my focus, or rather the largest driving factor, in some form or another has been to get to that level and when I actually had it I was like sweet this is all there is do lol. I switched to stage 3 alpha and the freedom and confidence I experience from it is fantastic but having a life filled with sexy gorgeous woman and being the kind of man who is their fantasy seems unshakably a primer motivator in my life. I kept wanting only to keep feeding that...sure enough I started expecting...and expectation leads to disappointment..and frustration. I've starting losing track and getting caught up in whats not working rather than what is. I can't help but get results anymore because I know where to focus and my core mindset and physiologically has been forever changed..my experience and lack of mind bs makes it easy.I just love that kind of love in my life.
two nights ago after after I hurt my foot playing basketball and then I stopped because I couldn't hobble any longer, I was sitting on a stoop and a sexy cougar literally seduced me right off the street. I was minding my own business texting she gets out of a cab and comes sits next to me and next thing I know after 2 hours of buying me drinks and making out she tells me she wants to bring me home and then..... she just bails when I go to the bathroom lol. The bartender said she had an early morning..I got super angry then started laughing because who cares I'm grateful that kind of stuff happens anyway but pissed this theme of nothing sticking is really showing up.The theme has been change..change..I can't control anything..ever...no security lol Those are my lessons until I make something more substantial in my life.
Anyway I am running Alpha stage 3 for a refresher now for 2-3 weeks and then a week of stage 6. with either winners mindset/everything is possible/or overcome self sabotage-have not decided yet. Then will be doing WM 4g with a different set every stage. Including ultra success 3g, ASC, gratitude, RNW, Extreme self esteem, and possibly carepe diem or seek the challenge.
I'm really enjoying alpha again and how it always de-fixes this myopic focus I have in life but on the other hand there is just something that feels really off with it..this was the case as well running it the first time. Its like all my motives comes from my mind instead of my heart or gut on it. I am also definitely being aware of certain things that are bothering me again and after feeling so ego-less and carefree it is very strange...its like I have been cast out of the palace of my own life to walk the warriors way again lol.
1. There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness.
2. A thinker sees his own actions as experiments and questions... Success and failure are for him answers above all.
3. I would not know what the spirit of a philosopher might wish more then to be than a good dancer.-F.N.
2. A thinker sees his own actions as experiments and questions... Success and failure are for him answers above all.
3. I would not know what the spirit of a philosopher might wish more then to be than a good dancer.-F.N.
