05-18-2019, 08:05 AM
(05-18-2019, 04:21 AM)CatMan Wrote: Okay...so first seven days of E3...
Day 1
-Within minutes of the first loop on day 1, felt a weird sensation in my chest, like a "blockage" or "weight" feeling. Still happens on and off now, I notice it randomly. Happening right now in fact. Strange sensation, I've had a few other times on some subs.
-First half of the first loop on the first day, I felt tired, sleepy and dozy. Pretty potent feeling. Either that's the program itself's power, or it already started hitting some serious stuff underneath, I don't know. I just know it was tiring me out from that first half loop at the time. Naturally, you assume since it's EHPRA it will be a "light" sub, but it seems to hit hard from the get go, don't be fooled. I was, and continue to be, surprised by it's potency and ability to make me feel dozy while listening even. Drains me of energy often, I've been surprised at it's power.
Day 2
-Called out some annoying, repetitive, high maintenance energy vampire behaviour from someone close to me on day 2. I was more forceful than usual, much less buffering of words if any. Felt good to do. And surprisingly wasn't met with hostility as I expected it to be after the sermon/riot act read to them, lmao. Since then, even at day 7 now...they've massively chilled out on that behaviour, which is fantastic news to me. I was considering "downsizing" that connection...
-Started having severe trouble sleeping. This was beginning to become a problem. Even listening during the day on hybrid headphones still didn't help it. I suspected it was either some turbulence, or some deep fears underneath being worked on. Either way, I had to ride it out and pushed through. I had to call in "sick" one day to do so, however. I had about 5 hours of sleep over two days...not sufficient at all.
Day 3
-Had a dream about a well-known social media influencer that in waking life, I have the opportunity to work with among others that I'm selecting currently, that I am very attracted to. I actually was viewing her profiles before going to bed the night before, so it's clear my mind was thinking about her while I slept, lol. Amusing. "Girl dreams" are generally very rare for me, regardless of program. So I felt that was worth noting. The dream itself was her being on a TV I was watching, and something about NLP was on the screen. The audio were these voices, speaking super fast, I couldn't make them out. I've had a dream similar to the voices thing LONG ago while on a sub, that time it was a radio. I suspected somehow I was able to tap into some kind of perspective where I could actually hear the sub in my mind audibly. Or...it was just a dream itself, and gibberish on purpose, who knows, lol.
Day 4
-Slept crappy AGAIN. 3 hours of sleep. Forced myself to take care of business this day. I had to. It was obviously a bit of a grind to do so. I started becoming quite surprised my sleep schedule was being wrecked so bad on E3. However, I still wanted to continue pushing with it.
-I have a weird feeling of being "dead" mentally. Like huge exhaustion somehow. I would tend to just "veg" while the loops played in my headphones, on hybrid flac. I again pondered that it must be digging up serious shit already. So I wanted to keep going, but was shocked with how hard it hit, and how early in the run.
-During the loops here, I started feeling a weird buzzing or tingling feeling in my torso. I've felt this before on a couple subs, but any physical sensations for me are always odd and notable when they happen.
Day 5
-Been drinking pop as I enjoy it, I thought maybe that was hurting the sleep schedule even though it wasn't out of ordinary consumption. I decided to at least start to observe how much I intake each day consciously to be sure. So overall here, maybe some UD, or maybe just further evidence of the war going on between E3 and the stuff in my mind, wrecking my sleep schedule this much. I figured I'd keep an eye on the pop consumption anyway, couldn't hurt anything at all at a minimum.
Day 7
-I just slept for 20 hours! WTF! I was very steamed about the big back and forth I was involved in, in another thread recently before bed...maybe something about that it was to do with, or some serious stuff underneath E3 was chewing on, and caused such massive exhaustion I slept for all that time. Shocking to go from almost zero sleep for days at a time, to massive coma. One extreme to the other, lol. Bit hard to build a life around as an entrepreneur...lmao. I'm trying my best, though! Obviously there's a ton of stuff going on underneath...surprising so much turmoil so soon. Can't be a bad thing in the long term. Short term...not so much fun...lol...
-Also...possibly TMI, but I've noticed something interesting. My annoying GI issues I've struggled with for a very long time on DMSI, have "seemed" to have gone away now. I don't want to jinx it, but there it is. They've been bad enough, where if I'm out at a function, and they "proc" on me, I need to bail asap. So far, they only happened on the first day of listening, which can be easily explained away as E3 barely had any "skin in the game" at that point. After that point, I don't think it's happened once. HUGE relief if that continues...
-While on this sub, I often feel a weird kind of "heat" inside me. I've felt it on DMSI at times. It's like...not a heat from turning up a thermostat...it's different. It feels deeper, internal, not from an external source. I feel it right now, this "heat". Tough to describe, not sure what that's about but it's odd enough that I felt like posting it, haha.
-Even today still, while doing my loops in headphones, hybrid flac, I feel dozy and my energy goes down low. Have to kinda fight to keep my eyes open during the loops. Again, I've been surprised by the program's power being that you assume EHPRA will be a "light touch" by nature.
-I have again now been unable to sleep at a "normal time". That is in part to the 20 hour coma, the day before I bet. I've stayed up all night as a result, and now have to be up all day! The sleep schedule is so chaotic and wrecked, very hard to maintain my routine and normal performance in my duties! I'm surprised again by the level of disruption to sleep, and hope that can dissipate over time...
That's about it for now. Thank you for your time, and for reading.
INTP-A
When you imagine something vividly... your subconscious will bring it into reality.
When you imagine something vividly... your subconscious will bring it into reality.