LTU 5 yeah, I did it too.

[Paul1131]

Nice job man with the anger issues. The goal is to get to a place where it don't even bother you how she act. Then you have full control of your response, able to joke it off. That's my goal plan at least, to be in a place where I always can joke at the situation. That's happiness! I can really recommend you look into meditation, it have helped me to distance myself from stuff other people do around me.

Umm, Joking at a ticked off spouse often doesn’t go well.  I have been meditating for years.  It helps me to have outward control, but hasn’t done nearly what this sub has done.  

Normally, I try not to speculate too much about what part of this sub is doing what, but the anti clutter module is definitely working.  I’ve been pretty disorganized all my life, and while my wife was pretty neat when we met, she was no match for my messy.  Well, soon after I started LTU, I started to be bothered by the state of the house.  I won’t say it was distressing exactly, but I got a strong urge to do something about it.  I started in the kitchen three days ago, and now it’s really neat and clean.  I don’t mean just neat and clean for me, I mean by anyone’s standards.  This is going to be very helpful going forward because we have an appraiser coming out in a month or so Forbes the second refinance. I’ll have the whole house and yard squared away by then.  Awesome.

I didnt mean that you should joke from a place from sarcasm, that will surely just make someone even more angry and fuel the conflict. But more being unaffected and joking from a place of love. I’m not there yet as I said but I know it’s achievable when you are no longer affected by the moods of others but live in your own emotional equilibrium.

I’ve tried to do that.  It doesn’t work.  I have yet to find a way to diffuse the situation when she gets going.  Frankly I’m not sure the relationship is going to survive me developing real self esteem.