E2 after E1 (100 days)

[TheWeapon]

Day 96

I had some type of breakthrough since last post but I can't explain it well or at all. I can see a pattern going and right now I am in a bit of a lull. I had my first dream last night for a while that affected me, but before that it was all static since the last "breakthrough". I don't even bother trying to understand it but I know overall that good things are happening. I do feel in a bit of haze/daze at times, especially when I am resisting, but I am noticing the cycles more now. The lulls where nothing much happens slowly ramps up with more vivid dreaming, then there is usually a bit of resistance where I want to return to old behaviors or thoughts to make myself feel better, but I keep pushing, listening even more before I have some enlightening dream that normally makes little sense, but I know it changes something deep in my mind, like releasing a fear or changing a belief. It goes something like that anyway, who knows though, it's hard to consciously process something that happens deeper.

I've had thoughts to try a new subliminal, but not for the purpose to run away from E2. I think for now I will stay with it because I wonder how many layers does this onion have. I peel back one layer, feel alight, then start working through the next layer. But overall a lot of my anxiety are gone or at least less now in respect to how I am perceived by others. Before E1, I was completely fixated worrying about what other people thought of me, but now after E1 and now E2, I am so much different and it seems to continue getting better all the time.

I can relate to the "peeling off the onion" you are talking about. Nice to hear about your progress! I also run E2 and will upgrade to E3 when it comes out to get the FRM and other nice technologies Shannon have developed since it was released.

I did not use to frequent the forum on a regular basis but lately I have been following Shannon's journal almost daily because of the new stuff happening. I don't understand the upgrades as good as the forum regulars but the FRM from what I remember sounds good. If it's able to bypass fear/resistance and allowing us to execute more easily that would be awesome.

I don't notice huge resistance doing E2, but perhaps the lull periods I describe happen because I am not ready to progress due to the go at your own pace nature of the subliminal. All just speculation, but overall I feel better within myself than I have in a long time and I also have a lot of new healthy habits that I began adopting during E1. The whole rigid all or nothing, success/failure, black and white mindset is a thing of the past, and I am able to flow a lot more through life now in both my actions and thoughts. I had a lot of dreams where I was in situations where I "failed" and rather than contract in shame, I was able to accept that it is no big deal.

Even though I am getting on in age, almost 39 now. I think I still have a lot of potential to achieve some things in life. I am not sure which direction to take with the subliminals, but I know I will keep using them from this site. They are too good to ignore, but I will need to think what direction I want to take in life. Stick with E2, upgrade to E3 or try something new like USLM4. LTU would be cool but I don't have that type of cash to spend on a subliminal. Maybe if I was single and didn't have kids I would, but I'd feel a bit selfish spending that much on myself.