I met with my ex girlfriend yesterday and we talked about the last years, we have been together for about 1,5 years and been meeting on and off for maybe 1,5 longer. I have been ill during the time, and really been out of it, mentally and emotionally ill, but she have stayed with me. All the talk I have done about her sexually manipulating me and stuff haven't really been her, but my own insecurities being manifested. I realize this now, and I know this is the only healthy way to look at it. Something I have to grow out to, just like Shannon have stated when I have brought the matter to his attention.
Anyway, we talked and it felt really good just talking things through, I realize how much I really like her, even though I know we can't be together. She is a wonderful person and I am so happy that I got to know her, but also that I'm able to start to see this. She really has a wonderful way of looking at people, and this is something that I will bring with me, to always see the positive things in others and seeing their goodness.
That she stayed with me really helped me, but also caused problems for her, creating a kind of co-dependency. We talked about that and I think that it may have helped her to bring the thing out and just talking about it.
We decided to say goodbye to each other and I couldn't really take it in at that moment but man what I cried on my way home from her and during the whole evening. It really felt like something ended there, and that made me so sad. I have a bit of a hard time to put words on my feelings but I know that my heart is a bit broken right now and I need to grief some more before being open to meeting someone else in the future.
Anyway, we talked and it felt really good just talking things through, I realize how much I really like her, even though I know we can't be together. She is a wonderful person and I am so happy that I got to know her, but also that I'm able to start to see this. She really has a wonderful way of looking at people, and this is something that I will bring with me, to always see the positive things in others and seeing their goodness.
That she stayed with me really helped me, but also caused problems for her, creating a kind of co-dependency. We talked about that and I think that it may have helped her to bring the thing out and just talking about it.
We decided to say goodbye to each other and I couldn't really take it in at that moment but man what I cried on my way home from her and during the whole evening. It really felt like something ended there, and that made me so sad. I have a bit of a hard time to put words on my feelings but I know that my heart is a bit broken right now and I need to grief some more before being open to meeting someone else in the future.
