10-17-2018, 03:51 AM
Thinking about all this lately and I'd like to run AM again. But we've come so far with the tech and in all honesty I don't want to go back. So I thought about the goals of dmsi and whether or not they'd overlap with other goals. To me I feel like being sexy is having a strong life goal, not caring what others think, and not being afraid to go against the grain when it comes to living life. So I don't know if OE would take care of those for me as well. Certainty felt like it with 3.2 and 3.1, it's how I got my current job.
I would like to be more alpha, just for the sake of being able to deal with life and the shit it throws your way. I can't keep going in life just being afraid of everyone. I want to be tougher without throwing away my good traits like compassion, empathy, and being a mediator. Basically I'm the type of guy to let stuff go until it gets to the point where I have to do something. Unfortunately I feel like I let people go to far and I should have the courage to metaphorically "bite" back before they go too far. People go, hey here's a guy who just takes it let me see how much I can get away with. I lied to myself for years just saying I was a peaceful person and it didn't bother me, but when push comes to shove I want to know that I can put my foot down and end the bullshit.
When you're afraid you come up with all types of excuses to justify your behavior. For me I felt anger was bad, being assertive was bad, being dominant was bad. Basically anything that would mean me facing conflict head on was bad. This way I didn't acknowledge I was afraid and didn't feel like a coward, which is basically what it was.
I would like to be more alpha, just for the sake of being able to deal with life and the shit it throws your way. I can't keep going in life just being afraid of everyone. I want to be tougher without throwing away my good traits like compassion, empathy, and being a mediator. Basically I'm the type of guy to let stuff go until it gets to the point where I have to do something. Unfortunately I feel like I let people go to far and I should have the courage to metaphorically "bite" back before they go too far. People go, hey here's a guy who just takes it let me see how much I can get away with. I lied to myself for years just saying I was a peaceful person and it didn't bother me, but when push comes to shove I want to know that I can put my foot down and end the bullshit.
When you're afraid you come up with all types of excuses to justify your behavior. For me I felt anger was bad, being assertive was bad, being dominant was bad. Basically anything that would mean me facing conflict head on was bad. This way I didn't acknowledge I was afraid and didn't feel like a coward, which is basically what it was.
INFP
