My experience with EPRHA

[Greenduck]

Hi there Asanti!

What are the issues you have been dealing with? Not really following your post. (If you want to share)

Hi Greenduck :-) I've been dealing with all that I've been made up of, which is:
1. unhealthy overgrown idealism (seeing greatness out there in others and not giving attention to myself - this alone has been very taxing on my energy levels)
2. the tendency to get pumped up and egocentric whenever I succeed in sth (working in the direction of calming that down and balancing it out)
3. lots of unhealthy attachment, the connections I've been making to other ppl have been shallow and energy-consuming, by detaching I've been creating more space and regaining trapped energy
4. and on top of all that complete lack of self-validation, zero here, been very clingy to others. That's pretty much it.

And in all those years I've been just dealing with various layers of those issues. I'm getting to the core now and it gets more challenging. The present moment is our best friend as everything can be changed and redirected in the now.

Interesting with your dream, I don't have any experience in reading dreams, but if you are interested in that maybe you should read freud's famous book on that topic. Can't remember the name of it right now but google is your friend!

I sometimes can get really dragged into my dreams and keep thinking on then throughout the day, but I at the same time know that if they have any symbolic meaning, I can only see it after a while when I got some distance to it. So I try not get to involved in what they were, just making a mental note and coming back to them later to see if there can be any insights drawn from them.

Yes, that's interesting, first distance yourself to the dream and then the meaning may occasionaly pop up in your mind, had that in the past. Cool

I've read little bit of your journal and I've seen that you too are going through some challenging stuff.... Good luck with your healing&clearing :-)

Very well put there. I recognize myself in some of the things that you mention. We need do allow ourselves to create distance to others to get to know who we are and create real relationships instead of just mirroring other people and being who they need us to be.

Good luck to you to! And hope you look into the TRE-stuff i recommended before, it's really great

EDIT:
Thought some your post and when meeting my brother who visited my family. I have been raised to help other people and cater them somewhat, to be kind, but the ability to care for myself without guilt is somewhat foreign for me. You know, to feel like "i am great" or whatever. Still is. But I am learning, and the most important thing, I am learning that it is OK to root for my own team in a balanced manner.

Checked out the TRE-method. Looks interesting. Do you learn this by yourself?
Does it help? Some positions look like yoga (I train yoga and calisthenics), although I understand that there is something more to it than just simple exercises. Looks little bit funny when people start to tremble while in a position I guess they release some deep stuff.. hmm:idea:

I created lots of tension in my body by focusing way too much on external results, whereas it's actually "the why", "the intention" behind the action that matters... So my tension has been a long-term tension, a marathon-tension, not sure if TRE would help... but maybe I should give it a try in addition to my simple mindfullness practice

Btw if you would feel like you could check out My Big Toe by Thomas Campbell. I've found lots of answers to my questions, and yet so much more, in his books. Beautiful trilogy. Didn't finish yet, still reading

How many brothers do you have? (just curious, you don't have to share if you don't feel like). I have only one brother and no sisters. I always thought that we two are so different, but as I've been recovering from my depression&anxiety I have seen that we actually have a lot in common emotionaly... much more than I ever would be willing to admit, funny... I have seen that we actually are somehow connected, me, my brother and my parents.

Yeah they warm-up exercises are inspired from yoga, I seldom do them, but just go on with the tremors as I can set them of at will now days.

TRE will take care of that to. Just as with subliminals the tremors works in layers, some days I just lay there and breathe slowly and deeply, and some days my body really want to get rid of some serious tension and the tremors become pretty wild and intense. But done long enough, all tension in the psoas-muscle (which stores the fight or flight/stress-related tension) is relaxed and you will enjoy the benefits of that.

It's on my reading list. I'm in que for it in my local library (after I read about it here in your journal actually).

I have two brothers. They are much older then me (could be my dads, haha) and they didn't live with me as I grew up, but they were around often.

Well same here. When depressed I wanted to distance myself from people, seeing all their faults and often portraying them as the cause for my depression, but as I heal, I can see (and feel) our natural connection and realize that the bond we share are the strongest I have with anyone.

If you are interested you can read some about chakras, you probably have come in touch with them as you practise yoga. Our root-chakra is where our family bonds are stored, and as that become unblocked we have a easier time to relate to our family (and nature for that sake, animals, everything that is "basic-human" stuff).

EDIT:
I learned about TRE by the book by David Berceli who invented the method.