Alrighty! I can finally share some positive stuff with you guys. I have had the feeling that much of my previous posts was (understandably though) about negative stuff. But as I feel that the clouds are finally starting to disperse, I can also start so see some positive stuff happening, and also in a way keeping the memories "in mind". Like there is a container where I can store my emotions and memories, where there previously haven't been one.
So:
1) Had some really good laughing with my dad over Fawly Towers (brittish comedy series with John Cleese) and some random stuff yesterday. Can't remember when I had that before. We relate a lot to each other through humor, so it feels good to know that the connection is still there.
2) I feel more confident in social interactions, even though that people don't always recieve me positively I can now carry the knowledge that it doens't have to do with just me, everyone has their stuff. And even though it could be because of that I am a bit awkward, that is fine, haha.
3) I feel more like myself in general. Like that the humor is back, and I feel like _me_ again.
4) I confront my fears, have had some big fears coming up especially during my muay thai practices but I face them, and feel stronger after I have done it.
5) I feel more grounded. Like today I took a chill out moment after my muay thai exercise and layed in the grass, and I could litteraly feel the ground underneath me more than usually, and just felt in some fundamental way content. I felt good!
So:
1) Had some really good laughing with my dad over Fawly Towers (brittish comedy series with John Cleese) and some random stuff yesterday. Can't remember when I had that before. We relate a lot to each other through humor, so it feels good to know that the connection is still there.
2) I feel more confident in social interactions, even though that people don't always recieve me positively I can now carry the knowledge that it doens't have to do with just me, everyone has their stuff. And even though it could be because of that I am a bit awkward, that is fine, haha.
3) I feel more like myself in general. Like that the humor is back, and I feel like _me_ again.
4) I confront my fears, have had some big fears coming up especially during my muay thai practices but I face them, and feel stronger after I have done it.
5) I feel more grounded. Like today I took a chill out moment after my muay thai exercise and layed in the grass, and I could litteraly feel the ground underneath me more than usually, and just felt in some fundamental way content. I felt good!
