07-17-2018, 01:38 PM
On the topic of control. I think I try to control my emotions too much. The energy of them at least. My response to them is absolutely something I can control, but the emotions themselves exist like strong ocean waves within me and trying to stand up and push them back is an exercise in futility.
I think at some point I confused the emotions themselves vs my reaction to them. So in an effort to move forward with my life I just shut it down completely. What I really should have done is accept how I feel and learn from it/improve it. But I pretty much threw the baby out with the bathwater. No wonder I've felt empty for these past few years, I literally denied myself permission to feel my emotions fully.
I think at some point I confused the emotions themselves vs my reaction to them. So in an effort to move forward with my life I just shut it down completely. What I really should have done is accept how I feel and learn from it/improve it. But I pretty much threw the baby out with the bathwater. No wonder I've felt empty for these past few years, I literally denied myself permission to feel my emotions fully.
INFP
