Shannon's Journal Discussion Volume 3

[DarthXedonias]

Hey Shannon--I've been taking a bit of a break from the forums, so I apologize if this question has already been answered, but I figured it's worth a shot asking, because I think at least someone needs to report this type of stuff:

I'm wondering if it's possible to resist or self-sabotage a script so much that you in fact execute and manifest the polar opposite of what you're trying to attract. When I was on DMSI3.01A, I noticed, albeit slowly, beautiful women manifesting themselves for me, and grew to a place of extreme happiness. Friends and coworkers were all treating me a lot more nicely, and also with a lot more respect. When I began DMSI 3.1A, I quickly experienced high-threat regular (generally daily) anxiety and panic attacks... the dream job and opportunity I had manifested as part of my growth on DMSI 3.01A turned into an absolute nightmare--a quintissential hollywood horror story--my best friend, and the only person I've felt really close with since my Dad died, had to move out of the city I was living in because he suffered his own personal tragedy (which I admittedly don't think had anything to do with DMSI), and I eventually suffered a series of mental breakdowns and anxiety attacks which led me to impulsively quit my job and move across the country back home on a total whim, since which I have never fully recovered.

I recently moved back to Southern California to pursue my dreams when DMSI 3.2 was released. I started with the B side and immediately noticed all of my old anxieties, insecurities, fears and paranoid emotions all returning at once. Since running DMSI 3.2 A on and off now for the past several months, I have been sexually assaulted by an old, disgusting gay man, sexually violated/harrassed by a disgusting elderly african american woman who was disorderly and drunk, and I have been physically attacked by an enraged taxi driver who grew upset with my friend/co-rider and eventually turned all of his physical aggression on me (For no apparent reason at all), got out of his cab, chased me onto my property and began to push me down and punch me before I was dragged away and into my home by my friends. I have seen about 3 sure-thing guaranteed job offers for me come onto the table, only to somehow get pulled away from me for no clear-cut reason ever identified. The only commonality in all of these instances is that I had been actively listening to DMSI 3.2, either A side or B side, the current day or the evening/day beforehand.

Just yesterday, after re-starting DMSI 3.2-A for about 4 days, our neighbor's schizophrenic bipolar son apparently returned into their custody. He's 450lbs, completely delusional and insane, and is obsessed with coming to our house and asking if I'm around. He's tried to gain entry into our house several times, and the family is not taking any responsibiltiy for his behavior. He's threatened my roommate because he thought he was smiling (my roommates and I are all very scared of this person and were not smiling). I legitimately fear for my safety, and the only logical connection I can make between all of the terrifying events I have lived through in the past 6 months is that I have always been running DMSI during these times.

I understand that this is a seriously loaded question, but I want to make clear that I realize that I'm trying this sub at my own risk, and that if my subconscious is indeed self-sabotaging or resisting by manifesting only insanity, danger, and violence into my life when all I want more than anything right now is financial, professional, mental and emotional security, I can stop the sub at any time and have always noticed these manifestations resolve themselves/go away after a day or two.

I don't know if what I'm suggesting is even possible--but since you've been getting (mostly) positive feedback, or at least strong growth and results, from almost everyone on this forum, I wanted to see if anyone else had experienced strong symptoms of manifesting things/people you are subconsciously/consciously afraid of in the early stages of running DMSI3.2, or if such a thing (the counter-manifestations of the script) is even theoretically possible.

Not Shannon, but I can tell you its very possible. I know on B my mind pretty much did the same tactic. It felt similar to when Shannon would talk about his "cycle". Pretty much I was constantly on an emotional roller coaster ride and anything bad that could happen would happen. It was constantly one bad thing after another. I figured out that most likely it was my mind trying to manifest bad things to use that negative energy to power resistance to the sub and in general make my mind less "stable" so I couldn't execute properly. A kind of scorched earth tactic being used.

On A I didn't notice that tactic used. What I noticed on A was that my mind played a different game. It made me generally feel nothing and care about nothing really. When I ran A long enough this turned into full blown nihilism. This was done especially towards women so that none of the snipers would activate and I'm assuming this effected manifestation somehow as well. Since I had no interest, no women would manifest because there were no women to be interested in. The only exception to this seemed to be OE pushing me to better myself in the Philippines and then it seemed I was able to execute over there to a degree. Now that I'm back I'm still noticing the same games though played with regards to local women. I just don't really have any interest and any time I have felt myself close to sniping its like something artificially comes up in my mind that is just "barely" holding it back by artificially suppressing my interest. It seems like on A the sub is powerful enough with the healing that my mind can't summon negative energy in order to feed off it to power the resistance. So it went to the tactic of just totally removing interest in anything so I won't achieve the goals.

Either way it is totally possible for your mind to be reacting this way because I noticed some of the same stuff happening, especially on version B.