07-04-2018, 03:09 PM
Today has been a bit of a downer.
Listened to 4 runs on A.
During listening, saw a neighbor of mine get into a car full of his friends and it immediately brought me back to my younger years (5yrs ago) where I was massively depressed because I felt alone. I started to tear up.
Went to a street fair with ~5-10k people. Lots of cute women there too. No desire to approach, but I had a desire to want to be with people.
Part of it I think comes down to the goals I put on myself.
I am currently building a product that I hope takes off and gives me a life of freedom (where I do not need to rely on a job). Then I think that would unlock my potential with women since I feel hindered currently, living w/ my father.
I've got these forces pulling me in different directions.
One is saying:
"You're never going to be as young as you are, go approach women and seduce them. Who cares if your living with your dad."
The other says:
"Put all your energy into creating this business and then when it works out, you'll have women banging down your door and you'll be super attractive and sexy."
With DSMI, the second voice has been massively strengthened.
I am going to try lucid dreaming to see if I can get past my resistance too.
Let you all know how that goes.
Listened to 4 runs on A.
During listening, saw a neighbor of mine get into a car full of his friends and it immediately brought me back to my younger years (5yrs ago) where I was massively depressed because I felt alone. I started to tear up.
Went to a street fair with ~5-10k people. Lots of cute women there too. No desire to approach, but I had a desire to want to be with people.
Part of it I think comes down to the goals I put on myself.
I am currently building a product that I hope takes off and gives me a life of freedom (where I do not need to rely on a job). Then I think that would unlock my potential with women since I feel hindered currently, living w/ my father.
I've got these forces pulling me in different directions.
One is saying:
"You're never going to be as young as you are, go approach women and seduce them. Who cares if your living with your dad."
The other says:
"Put all your energy into creating this business and then when it works out, you'll have women banging down your door and you'll be super attractive and sexy."
With DSMI, the second voice has been massively strengthened.
I am going to try lucid dreaming to see if I can get past my resistance too.
Let you all know how that goes.
