06-23-2018, 05:55 PM
Hey man, for what it's worth I know what you're going through. You just have to buckle down though and tell yourself you're doing it. Run DMSI A or E2, but stay consistent. That's all you have to do. Hit that play button every night and keep going. Honestly I'd go with DMSI A, and experiment with the loops. Up it by one a week, just push it, don't question it too much.
That emotional jail you've felt just sounds like fear. Your mind will come up with the most ridiculous reasons for not running the sub and you have to ignore ALL of them. It sounds like your subconscious didn't want to let go of past memories and emotional states, so it convinced you that what DMSI was doing was bad in some way. This is the sneaky stuff that happens. It'll be framed as being in your best interest, some powerful insight that will help you move forward (when in actuality it holds you back), and your mind telling you there's some better way that you're not seeing.
I've been through it all man and the only answer is to stop ruminating on it and keep pushing. You won't find the answers on this forum, trust me. I know how scary success and change can be, but it's all just excuses. And I'm not saying it's as simple as deciding to change, hell no. It's bumpy, lots of ups and downs. But these barriers aren't unbreakable, as long as you keep trying you'll improve. If you need someone to hold you accountable I'm always a PM away.
And you're not a wuss. I've hid all my life and it's because we've been saddled with shit most other people never experience. But you can choose to get better. Start by telling yourself none of this is your fault and you promise to do everything within your capabilities to get better. Being kinder to yourself is about realizing that it doesn't matter what you deal with as long as you promise yourself to get better for yourself. Not to overcome being a wuss, not to seem more confident to others, just solely for you. Do it because you want to lead a better happier life and you deserve it.
That emotional jail you've felt just sounds like fear. Your mind will come up with the most ridiculous reasons for not running the sub and you have to ignore ALL of them. It sounds like your subconscious didn't want to let go of past memories and emotional states, so it convinced you that what DMSI was doing was bad in some way. This is the sneaky stuff that happens. It'll be framed as being in your best interest, some powerful insight that will help you move forward (when in actuality it holds you back), and your mind telling you there's some better way that you're not seeing.
I've been through it all man and the only answer is to stop ruminating on it and keep pushing. You won't find the answers on this forum, trust me. I know how scary success and change can be, but it's all just excuses. And I'm not saying it's as simple as deciding to change, hell no. It's bumpy, lots of ups and downs. But these barriers aren't unbreakable, as long as you keep trying you'll improve. If you need someone to hold you accountable I'm always a PM away.
And you're not a wuss. I've hid all my life and it's because we've been saddled with shit most other people never experience. But you can choose to get better. Start by telling yourself none of this is your fault and you promise to do everything within your capabilities to get better. Being kinder to yourself is about realizing that it doesn't matter what you deal with as long as you promise yourself to get better for yourself. Not to overcome being a wuss, not to seem more confident to others, just solely for you. Do it because you want to lead a better happier life and you deserve it.
INFP
