05-17-2018, 04:52 AM
I just had a really good talk with my therapist about my problems with my mother and my previous relationship.
I have always been really good at "reading" other people and understanding what they feel, and this stems from my relationship with my mother. I have not been feeling comfortable with feeling my own emotions, as she is very reactive on that and can't acknowledge other people emotions, and have not affirmed my emotions. Therefore I have developed a reluctancy towards my own emotions and focus more on other peoples emotions.
Talking about this really triggered something in me, a deep anger towards my mother for how she have treated me. How she have manipulated me because of her own insecurities, and her need to "spread her world view" as I put it. That shit really is really deep down with me, it's an infinginment of my self.
I know that I like myself, but I have always felt somewhat uncomfortable with that. Partly because of my mother but also because of my previous girlfriend, who also was insecure and wanted me to "adore her".
Really good session, interesting and it helped me to reach some deeper stuff that I have not been able to process or reach before.
And this anger, I know it will guide me back to myself and will protect me from that kind of behavior. I really feel it in me, but also towards all those f*ckers out there who mess with other peoples way of living, just because they are so insecure themselves.
I have always been really good at "reading" other people and understanding what they feel, and this stems from my relationship with my mother. I have not been feeling comfortable with feeling my own emotions, as she is very reactive on that and can't acknowledge other people emotions, and have not affirmed my emotions. Therefore I have developed a reluctancy towards my own emotions and focus more on other peoples emotions.
Talking about this really triggered something in me, a deep anger towards my mother for how she have treated me. How she have manipulated me because of her own insecurities, and her need to "spread her world view" as I put it. That shit really is really deep down with me, it's an infinginment of my self.
I know that I like myself, but I have always felt somewhat uncomfortable with that. Partly because of my mother but also because of my previous girlfriend, who also was insecure and wanted me to "adore her".
Really good session, interesting and it helped me to reach some deeper stuff that I have not been able to process or reach before.
And this anger, I know it will guide me back to myself and will protect me from that kind of behavior. I really feel it in me, but also towards all those f*ckers out there who mess with other peoples way of living, just because they are so insecure themselves.
