Im walkimg very cocky, slow and carefree in public, dominant and at ease. Its like being in the zone.
I have some strong turmoil coming up. One girl directly proposed netflix and chill, asking directly when. I have this old pattern now surfacing which basically catches me off guard and my being being freezes up. No surprise now that Im running A. Its staring right in my face.
She started to call me "good boy"
I called her out.
Challenge followed a bit, and I said to her "Im far from being nice"
She: "okay, so when is the coffee date/netflix and chill?"
The fuck. When im with N, J and what not, it flows. But the intensity of this stirrs up a response. Im feeling torn apart for some reason. Like, my subc goes into resistance and heels in the sand. The intensity of this coming up is raw. Like screaming right in my face, grasping me whole. Could be that it triggers powerlessness, lack of control.
So, next is, that my life is to be putted upside down. Like, restructuring through DMSI. total shift in lifestyle. Perhaps DMSI is cofronting me in the area of leading, and letting her lead is something coming up, her desiring me more then I hers. It is something that I also had thinking about, how DMSI seems to be the flipside of AM6. The opposite of leading so to say, her working and ending up to sex.
Im also having thoughts popping up of SM3 and AM6 and being a sexual barbarian.
What now stirrs up is anxiety. An feeling of "I need to act on this, I have to/obligated/pressure" but my bodylanguage is just total swag, dominance and alphaness.
Edit: I also when finished my workout, the guy I met on AM6, pro-boxer, we vibed strongly. Our energy was blasting and autopilot made it a party to behold. Talked a bit, he complimented me on my growth, it was really great. Its like walking in a venue and neing a superstar celeb. The other guy, a friend of his, or a familiar of his, kept blending in, complimenting on my arms, yet this caused me to ignore him.
Im peaking on my social abundance. Its skyhigh and skyrocketing. The girl at the gasstation was swooning just yet and I was really calm, slow, controlling and composed as I paid for my stuff. Like in the zone. Im digging autopilot. It happens more and more that I directly and instantly engage with people in smooth effortless ways.
Im wondering how this total non neediness is also some sort of resistance blend. It surely causes me to be icecold at times yet also not really caring on pushing things forward women wise. The pattern that surfaces does make question it, like it becomes to real or something.
I have some strong turmoil coming up. One girl directly proposed netflix and chill, asking directly when. I have this old pattern now surfacing which basically catches me off guard and my being being freezes up. No surprise now that Im running A. Its staring right in my face.
She started to call me "good boy"
I called her out.
Challenge followed a bit, and I said to her "Im far from being nice"
She: "okay, so when is the coffee date/netflix and chill?"
The fuck. When im with N, J and what not, it flows. But the intensity of this stirrs up a response. Im feeling torn apart for some reason. Like, my subc goes into resistance and heels in the sand. The intensity of this coming up is raw. Like screaming right in my face, grasping me whole. Could be that it triggers powerlessness, lack of control.
So, next is, that my life is to be putted upside down. Like, restructuring through DMSI. total shift in lifestyle. Perhaps DMSI is cofronting me in the area of leading, and letting her lead is something coming up, her desiring me more then I hers. It is something that I also had thinking about, how DMSI seems to be the flipside of AM6. The opposite of leading so to say, her working and ending up to sex.
Im also having thoughts popping up of SM3 and AM6 and being a sexual barbarian.
What now stirrs up is anxiety. An feeling of "I need to act on this, I have to/obligated/pressure" but my bodylanguage is just total swag, dominance and alphaness.
Edit: I also when finished my workout, the guy I met on AM6, pro-boxer, we vibed strongly. Our energy was blasting and autopilot made it a party to behold. Talked a bit, he complimented me on my growth, it was really great. Its like walking in a venue and neing a superstar celeb. The other guy, a friend of his, or a familiar of his, kept blending in, complimenting on my arms, yet this caused me to ignore him.
Im peaking on my social abundance. Its skyhigh and skyrocketing. The girl at the gasstation was swooning just yet and I was really calm, slow, controlling and composed as I paid for my stuff. Like in the zone. Im digging autopilot. It happens more and more that I directly and instantly engage with people in smooth effortless ways.
Im wondering how this total non neediness is also some sort of resistance blend. It surely causes me to be icecold at times yet also not really caring on pushing things forward women wise. The pattern that surfaces does make question it, like it becomes to real or something.
The trials you encounter will introduce you to your strengths. - epictetus
