03-16-2018, 08:26 AM
I read some of stuff in Shannon's journal discussion. I found this quote to be resonating.
After reading this, it made me better understand some of my fear about achieving the goal. Probably, the consequence of achieving the goal is the scariest part, then the unidentified, unknown territory being the next. Third would be, not knowing how to get there, and the last thing, may be women themselves, although I think I don't have that much fear about women. (It definitely decreased overtime from the past.) Strangely, I am not entangled with with the frame/paradigm that a man must do all the work, such as chasing, initiating, going on dating, escalating, and etc. Also for me, it isn't all that difficult to imagine women chasing me, although I don't remember having that experience/memory (maybe, I did have that experience, but). Still, I think that I sorta deny the possibility of that (women chasing me and escalating) happening to me.
I also think that logistics (although it's important) has become an easy excuse to not fully achieving the sub's goal. Perhaps, it's also something that's an easy escape from fully executing. At the same time, it's very silly to think logistics issue. For instance, I don't have a place for sex. (Home is not an option where I can bring a girl and have sex), nor I have enough money, or my own secret finance that I can book a room. Yet, this is quite silly. A girl, whom I may have sex with, could have her own space. Time wise, there's always a weekend, and if the girl's great, my parents would be welcoming me seeing her. (Although I'm not sure how they would feel about having premarital sex. One part of me thinks that they would seriously be infuriated, at the same time, I think they may look away.) Or, the girl may have enough money so that she can do all the financial work (i.e. buying condom, booking a room.)
There are endless possibilities of making that goal (i.e. getting amazing sex consistently), and it shouldn't be that hard. Yet, somehow it feels very hard, and I feel very lost at how to get there.
Now that I better understand about some of my fear, and can name them (before, I knew there was something uncomfortable for me, but I couldn't pin point which ones ). I wonder what I can do next, other than listening to the sub itself.
(03-14-2018, 08:16 AM)Shannon Wrote: I think the two biggest things holding you guys back are the prison bars you have created for yourselves from fear of succeeding at the goals (not knowing yet how to get from Point A to Point C, with Point B being scary because it is undefined), or being afraid of women, sex, the potential consequences of having sex, or maybe even your own sexuality;
...and the prison bars you have created for yourselves concerning what it means to "be a man". A lot of you have so built your core identities on "Me man, me must hunt, me must be initiator, me must be aggressor, me must do all work, me man!" that you cannot conceive in your own heads of being a man and being so high value that none of that is actually necessary. The really high value males, the real top level guys, the guys who are truly the cream of the crop, they do not chase because they never have to! You instead are stuck in the logical fallacy of insisting on the past: 1. It has never happened to me before that way, so obviously, it never will. 2. I have never seen a woman come on to a man in real life, so obviously that is impossible. 3. I have never been that high value before to a woman, so obviously, I never will.
These are the final barriers we face for almost all of you. Think about them. Realize how much YOU are stopping yourself by accepting these as true. I already have programming in the script that tries to deal with all of this, but you guys are fighting it so hard in a lot of cases that you refuse to allow it to execute, and refuse to open yourself to the new reality in which these beliefs are no longer limiting you.
After reading this, it made me better understand some of my fear about achieving the goal. Probably, the consequence of achieving the goal is the scariest part, then the unidentified, unknown territory being the next. Third would be, not knowing how to get there, and the last thing, may be women themselves, although I think I don't have that much fear about women. (It definitely decreased overtime from the past.) Strangely, I am not entangled with with the frame/paradigm that a man must do all the work, such as chasing, initiating, going on dating, escalating, and etc. Also for me, it isn't all that difficult to imagine women chasing me, although I don't remember having that experience/memory (maybe, I did have that experience, but). Still, I think that I sorta deny the possibility of that (women chasing me and escalating) happening to me.
I also think that logistics (although it's important) has become an easy excuse to not fully achieving the sub's goal. Perhaps, it's also something that's an easy escape from fully executing. At the same time, it's very silly to think logistics issue. For instance, I don't have a place for sex. (Home is not an option where I can bring a girl and have sex), nor I have enough money, or my own secret finance that I can book a room. Yet, this is quite silly. A girl, whom I may have sex with, could have her own space. Time wise, there's always a weekend, and if the girl's great, my parents would be welcoming me seeing her. (Although I'm not sure how they would feel about having premarital sex. One part of me thinks that they would seriously be infuriated, at the same time, I think they may look away.) Or, the girl may have enough money so that she can do all the financial work (i.e. buying condom, booking a room.)
There are endless possibilities of making that goal (i.e. getting amazing sex consistently), and it shouldn't be that hard. Yet, somehow it feels very hard, and I feel very lost at how to get there.
Now that I better understand about some of my fear, and can name them (before, I knew there was something uncomfortable for me, but I couldn't pin point which ones ). I wonder what I can do next, other than listening to the sub itself.
