02-28-2018, 08:38 AM
Day 5&6
Over the past three days, one emotion has been running rampant inside me: Anger.
In a nutshell, it's like I'm expecting girls should just be attracted to me and throw themselves at me, or at least make it easy for me to game them, i.e. cooperate. When the reality is they don't, I get really pissed off. Throughout the date on day 4, I was constantly annoyed that she didn't show attraction to me. After we parted, I felt like throwing her off a cliff.
Yesterday, a new girl who I was supposed to see flaked. She had a fever. I don't doubt that it's legit, but it still didn't stop me from calling her and persuading her for a good 5 minutes. I even stated in no uncertain terms that if she didn't see me today, there's no next time. I knew it's bad game, but I just couldn't help myself.
The anger issue was worse when I had less sleep. Last night I only had 4 hours of sleep. Today I fuming the whole day. I was supposed to see another new girl but this one flaked as well. She had to work overtime. Again, this one is legit, in fact she got off at 11pm, and she promised to treat me drinks next time, but I still got really pissed off. I managed to stop myself from scolding her, even though I wanted to.
This is the clearest effect I see with 3.2B right now. It's even clearer because I came off MLS. With MLS, it felt like I could direct my emotional state with logic and conscious will. When a girl flaked, I knew it's part of the game and I wasn't butthurt. I found something else to do instead or I had a backup girl to call up. I was also able to get into sexual state when I wanted to. But right now, my emotional states are out of my control.
Over the past three days, one emotion has been running rampant inside me: Anger.
In a nutshell, it's like I'm expecting girls should just be attracted to me and throw themselves at me, or at least make it easy for me to game them, i.e. cooperate. When the reality is they don't, I get really pissed off. Throughout the date on day 4, I was constantly annoyed that she didn't show attraction to me. After we parted, I felt like throwing her off a cliff.
Yesterday, a new girl who I was supposed to see flaked. She had a fever. I don't doubt that it's legit, but it still didn't stop me from calling her and persuading her for a good 5 minutes. I even stated in no uncertain terms that if she didn't see me today, there's no next time. I knew it's bad game, but I just couldn't help myself.
The anger issue was worse when I had less sleep. Last night I only had 4 hours of sleep. Today I fuming the whole day. I was supposed to see another new girl but this one flaked as well. She had to work overtime. Again, this one is legit, in fact she got off at 11pm, and she promised to treat me drinks next time, but I still got really pissed off. I managed to stop myself from scolding her, even though I wanted to.
This is the clearest effect I see with 3.2B right now. It's even clearer because I came off MLS. With MLS, it felt like I could direct my emotional state with logic and conscious will. When a girl flaked, I knew it's part of the game and I wasn't butthurt. I found something else to do instead or I had a backup girl to call up. I was also able to get into sexual state when I wanted to. But right now, my emotional states are out of my control.
