02-16-2018, 03:42 PM
Well I'll say this, so far the TID effects from 3.2 have strengthened my ability to face the challenges in my life. I no longer feel that sensation where I wanted to give up on everything. Things are still difficult for me, but at least now my focus is on how I can improve. So whenever I find myself being down I'm able to remind myself that I'm not there yet but I will get there.
Overall I feel I'm being more real with myself and working on things that need improvement vs trying to develop this facade or false self that's confident.
Do I feel sexy and like I can get the girls I desire? Not really. But the difference is I'm not dooming myself to a fate of never being attractive. In the past I'd take situations where girls weren't into me and use that as evidence that I'll never be attractive. At least now I'm receptive to the idea of becoming an attractive person. Part of doing so is just being myself and to stop dwelling on trying to come across in the most favorable way possible.
Caught myself on the drive home thinking about this whole thing and getting thoughts like getting women is overrated. Which is 100% bullshit because I've never experienced it, so I have no frame of reference. The whole I'm bored of this game that my subconscious uses to get me to stop pursuing a goal. In actuality it's just fear, again. And a little bit of ego protection in there because I'm still self conscious about the whole fact that my experience with women is practically 0. It's easier to shut down a goal vs facing the truth that I've just been too afraid to push my comfort zone.
Overall I feel I'm being more real with myself and working on things that need improvement vs trying to develop this facade or false self that's confident.
Do I feel sexy and like I can get the girls I desire? Not really. But the difference is I'm not dooming myself to a fate of never being attractive. In the past I'd take situations where girls weren't into me and use that as evidence that I'll never be attractive. At least now I'm receptive to the idea of becoming an attractive person. Part of doing so is just being myself and to stop dwelling on trying to come across in the most favorable way possible.
Caught myself on the drive home thinking about this whole thing and getting thoughts like getting women is overrated. Which is 100% bullshit because I've never experienced it, so I have no frame of reference. The whole I'm bored of this game that my subconscious uses to get me to stop pursuing a goal. In actuality it's just fear, again. And a little bit of ego protection in there because I'm still self conscious about the whole fact that my experience with women is practically 0. It's easier to shut down a goal vs facing the truth that I've just been too afraid to push my comfort zone.
INFP
