01-29-2018, 12:56 AM
The journey continues. I'm starting to really overcome my PTSD, being able to be calm around other people, where they seriously stressed me out previously. My dad and mom both have their good sides, but they can be agitating to be around when being together. It's like they make each other worse of. And you can't just "be" and "chill" when they are around if you let them get to you. I think they are somewhat stressed themselves, don't know why, and giving in to their needs just make things go bad. So if I just care about my business, read my morning paper and don't care about their emotional cues that they want attention or so forth, things settle down. But before, I couldn't do that. I couldn't focus on my business because everything around me set me into a very disturbed mode, especially people who need attention. You can figure the nightmare situation I have been facing at home for a long time.
But as I said, I now can do things I couldn't before. I feel more comfortable in myself and in my body and can set the boundaries I need to stay healthy, previously there was no boundaries.
I can somewhat plan for the future, can keep a straight line of thinking and feel like I have a "congruent presence" in lack of a better description, rather than being drawn into different directions depending on things that happened around me before.
If anyone know that I talk about and read this, please leave a comment, would be awesome to know that someone reads what I write and just get some feedback on it. A bit of a monologue here.
But as I said, I now can do things I couldn't before. I feel more comfortable in myself and in my body and can set the boundaries I need to stay healthy, previously there was no boundaries.
I can somewhat plan for the future, can keep a straight line of thinking and feel like I have a "congruent presence" in lack of a better description, rather than being drawn into different directions depending on things that happened around me before.
If anyone know that I talk about and read this, please leave a comment, would be awesome to know that someone reads what I write and just get some feedback on it. A bit of a monologue here.
