Thanks guys. I'm not in the mood to reply/argue with each of your messages but I'll just say I appreciate the contribution.
So far SE is not doing any good to me at all. Starting to believe that Shannon puts shady programmings in his subliminals. Because I don't understand how, overnight I turned out to be in such a messy place.
So much to gain some Self Esteem. I'm don't "process" people...Can't even look at them nor start a conversion. When someone is trying to engage a convo with me I wonder WTH does he want to talk with me. Skipped class today. I never thought that could happen, studies being the only field in my life I'm proud of.
I'm finding myself in the worst depressional state I've ever been in years. Suicidal thoughts are back, 0 motivation for anything is back, negative thinking is back...Now the new stuff: isolation, asociality, being extremely reserved. Online chats seem to be the only "escape" gate because that's only when I feel comfortable enough to socialize.
And this doesn't even make sense to me if this is resistence. DMSI was supposed to be the most scary goal to achieve, especially for users without any prior experience. Does it make sense to you guy, that getting some SE is far more scary for the subconscious than getting laid ?
Pfff, anyway, going to take some time off the forum, I don't want to spread my negativity with you guys. Will stick to SE and see what happens but I'd have to bear fully the (negative) consequences.
So far SE is not doing any good to me at all. Starting to believe that Shannon puts shady programmings in his subliminals. Because I don't understand how, overnight I turned out to be in such a messy place.
So much to gain some Self Esteem. I'm don't "process" people...Can't even look at them nor start a conversion. When someone is trying to engage a convo with me I wonder WTH does he want to talk with me. Skipped class today. I never thought that could happen, studies being the only field in my life I'm proud of.
I'm finding myself in the worst depressional state I've ever been in years. Suicidal thoughts are back, 0 motivation for anything is back, negative thinking is back...Now the new stuff: isolation, asociality, being extremely reserved. Online chats seem to be the only "escape" gate because that's only when I feel comfortable enough to socialize.
And this doesn't even make sense to me if this is resistence. DMSI was supposed to be the most scary goal to achieve, especially for users without any prior experience. Does it make sense to you guy, that getting some SE is far more scary for the subconscious than getting laid ?
Pfff, anyway, going to take some time off the forum, I don't want to spread my negativity with you guys. Will stick to SE and see what happens but I'd have to bear fully the (negative) consequences.
