SargeMaximus: Blooming to Alpha

[SargeMaximus]

Saving this so it doesn't get lost:

And that's why we gave up on you, Sarge. You just compared apples to asteroids to prove your point and not have to change. Have fun with that.

K, I'm trying here and this is what I get. *facepalm*

It's not about not having to change, it's about understanding how the world works.

Am I not correct when I say that if someone believed they could fly, went to the top of a skyscraper, and walked off the edge, am I not correct to say that their beliefs would not matter and they'd still be subject to gravity?

I don't see how women and attraction is any different. Maybe I just don't understand how it's different. Nothing you've said shows me how it's different.

There is what I was talking about, which is the psychology of perception, belief, choice and action resulting in a change externally (apples)... and there is arbitrarily deciding to believe the laws of physics no longer function on a whim. (asteroids)

You missed the point so completely that it's mind boggling, and this is exactly what I am talking about. You demonstrated my point in doing this. What you believe to be true, becomes your reality internally and thus externally as a result.

You believe that there is black and there is white, and no shade of gray exists. This is the only way to explain what results when I say what I do. The only way you can conceivably even try to compare apples to asteroids is if you see no difference between them.

Black and white thinking misses 99% of "what is" because 99% of "what is", isn't pure black or white.

You say that it disproves my point to say that beliefs create one's reality because choosing to believe that gravity doesn't exist fails to negate it. But I didn't say that you can change the laws of physics by simply trying to ignore them, which is what your example boils down to.

I said that by changing what you believe to be true, you change what you accept as true, and what you accept as true guides your point of view, your emotional and intellectual experience, your choices, actions, reactions and thus experience of the world around you.

If I believe that the world is black and white, then anything that is not white must be black by definition. All that is not good automatically becomes evil. All that is not perfect is infinitely flawed. All that is not an absolute... does not even exist. This creates a situation in which you try to force all things to fit into a binary expression, when they do not. Rainbows do not consist of black or white. Almost nothing does, in fact. Which means that you must necessarily misunderstand and mis-perceive all things that are not absolutes, and that's just about... everything.

I'll try to simplify this a bit.

Little boy A decides that he has no reference point for how he is or should be perceived by the group. Little boy B decides he's cool and doesn't care what the group thinks.

A will necessarily have to ask the group... "What should I think of myself?" The group, upon seeing that question, concludes that A is "not cool", because cool people never ask that question. They're cool and they know it.

B will simply assume he is cool, and the group will see that expressed in his actions, attitude, speech, body language, beliefs, choices and reactions. These all communicate "I'm cool" as a result, which the group recognizes as being the behavior of cool people, and assumes he is cool.

"Being cool" is a point of opinion. Nothing more. Everything else results from the belief that the person is or is not cool in response to what they communicate about that status. If I think I'm cool, most people will assume I am cool if I communicate that with a strong enough point of reference that does not fade when someone challenges it. Being uncool is only a state of opinion, and likewise only exists in the mind. It can only exist in the mind of the person if they choose to believe it is true. It can only exist in the mind of the perceive if they choose to believe that it is true.

Little boy A asks, "Am I cool?" and displays the behavior of someone other than the leader, and is therefore not "cool". The response is, "No, you are not cool." Little boy A believes what the group has told him is true (accepts an external reality internally) and then makes that reality true by accepting it as true and acting as if it is true.

Little boy B never asks, "Am I cool?". He simply assumes he is cool, and doesn't care what anyone else thinks. This is the behavior of a leader, which the group associates with "cool" and they therefore take his communication as true - he believes he is cool without us telling him so, and therefore he must know something we don't, so we accept him as being cool. The moment they do, they now believe he is cool and accept it as true, and their resulting choices and actions perpetuate that reality, thus making it true externally as a result.

"Cool" is entirely subjective. This means that A can later decide, "I'm cool and I don't care what others think." and have the same thing happen - others see the change in communication from "I'm uncool" to "I'm cool" and they accept it as true, thus making it true.

Vice versa can also happen.

Reality is not black and white. You cannot simply decide that the law of gravity no longer applies to you and float away without some pretty advanced mastery of the whole of the laws of the universe and how to use them. Since almost nobody has that level of knowledge or mastery, nobody has ever seen such a thing before, and their reality becomes: it's impossible. Let's presume for the sake of brevity that it is, indeed, impossible. Let's say that the laws of the universe are in fact perfectly understood by humans, all of them are known, and none of them can be bent, used against each other, transcended or broken. This leaves us with the state of affairs that one cannot simply decide to walk off a building and fly.

But there is more to the universe than black and white. There are laws and laws that govern laws and laws we don't know about yet. There are things we can directly change and control and things we cannot and things in between.

I can change what I believe. If I do, my point of view changes to match that new belief. That adjusts my reaction to the conditions of the world around me, and that adjusts my choice of actions. It also adjusts how the world reacts to me, and thus, what I experience.

The world is what it is at the same time it is what I think it is. One of them relies on things outside my control, and one relies on things within my control. But I am limited to what I can perceive and understand, and that is based on my beliefs and my limits which are created by my beliefs, and my beliefs and thus my limits are a choice I make. The universe is a blank slate, and what you believe creates the limits that shape your perception of it. Those perceptions result in your understanding of it, which creates the beliefs you form about it, which result in the choices you make and the actions you take and the way those actions affect the world around you and thus what happens because of and to you in response, which then feed back into that and are interpreted by you according to those points of view and understandings and beliefs, which then perpetuate the reality you think you perceive because of those beliefs and points of view.

Thus... what you believe is what becomes your reality. To the carpenter, everything is understood through the lens of carpentry. To the photographer, everything is about light. To the SJW, everything is about injustice. To the racist, everything is about race. In reality the world is none of these things, because all of these become a facet of the true whole. It just depends on what you believe to be true, how you therefore limit yourself, and what you create as your reality by responding to your beliefs and the world around you through those beliefs, and then the response from the world around you to those actions and choices and beliefs.

I don't think you're going to understand what I'm trying to communicate, but there it is. By insisting that apples and asteroids are the same thing, and that my point is therefore disproven, you are only demonstrating that because of your beliefs, you limit yourself to a point of view that cannot comprehend the difference between apples and asteroids, and this causes my point to be lost because it isn't black or white, and therefore becomes inconceivable and thus "wrong" to you.

Great post, gave me a multitude of "light bulb moments" specifically pertaining to women and how that all might work. I'm trying to put my thoughts down so I don't just snap back to my old way of thinking, but it occurs to me that if you act a certain way, people respond a certain way to you, and that alone may be enough to "get" the women you want. :o