In this for the healing DMSI v3.1 A

[kalmah0804]

@kalmah0804

Are you saying to live in the present and expereince the moment and dont destroy yourself over things you simply cannot control, past, present, or future.... but still try to work towards achieving these things such as a more fulfilling sex/love life, more success in music goals, and other stuff?

if you let go of the desires, then how do you continue pursuing music, women, or whatever if the desire no longer exists, and what's the reason for doing it if the desire no longer exists?

These are just my own personal beliefs right now. I can't tell you what works for everyone.

In an ideal state, you will want nothing. You should feel completely fully happy and content with yourself and want for nothing. Once all desire is truly dead inside of you, you can replace those old desires with the same things, but from a healthier standpoint.

The problem is that right now, for someone like me, my desires to be loved by a woman or to have success in my career and be respected by my peers all stems from a negative place. They're not actually desires or goals--they are treated by my subconscious as *needs*. The amount of control these *desires* have over my life is batshit insane. I don't feel this torn up about not having anything to drink despite being really thirsty as I do when I'm rejected or spurned by a girl I've taken interest in, and I don't feel as helpless and desperate and afraid when my career's taken a hopeless turn for the worse and I feel no control over my situation whatsoever. For me, I treat these major "desires" as more psychologically important and impactful than basic survival needs--there's something wrong with that.

I'd imagine that a lot of people on this forum suffer from the same type of thinking, hence the huge market for subs like AM or SM or DMSI or even something like BAMM. The subs are powerful tools and we shouldn't discard them, but we should also strive to find inner peace and total self-acceptance from within without ever feeling the *need* to achieve the goals.

We kill these *needs* within ourselves and focus more on being in the present. Create music because you enjoy creating music. Socialize with women not to fuck them but merely because you enjoy flirting with girls and making them laugh. Live in the present and learn to be content and at peace with yourself and kill off all of your needs. This is a really difficult thing to do. I'm still doing it right now. I'm horribly and miserable and depressed as fuck right now because a girl I've been going out with now for a little over a month is slowly starting to show less interest and (I feel) is blowing me off. I'm totally dismayed and destroyed by it because all I've wanted for as long as I can remember is to be totally loved by a woman in such a romantic, intimate light, and I really thought that this was going to be it. I'm not too optimistic about my chances with her anymore, and am destroying myself psychologically.

Even while recognizing this, I can tell you this is not ok. To be so mentally distraught over the rejection of a single woman makes no goddamned logical sense. So, I need to kill this "desire" of wanting a relationship. I need to go on dates to socialize and meet girls, not to find love and romantic companionship. I need to kill this desire so that rejection cannot hurt me and I can find some semblance of peace living by myself and supplying my own self-affection and self-love.

And once I've achieved this state, I can date women because I *choose* to, not because I *need* to. I can work in the film industry because I *choose* to. NOT because I NEED to.

Does this make sense at all?