06-25-2017, 03:39 PM
Day 118
Decided to try out a new volume schedule. I found out that middle range volumes don't really work for me. It's either low or high, there ain't no middle path here.
Therefore, I'm going to be running and testing 5 days of low, followed by 2 days of high. My theory for this is that the 5 days of low will allow the subconscious to plan and prepare, start digging methodically, let the suggestions imprint.. and then hit it with the full force of DMSI, ordering it to act upon those suggestions and follow them.
Like a priming effect.
Yesterday was the first day of this cycle (after the day of really loud where I stuck through the terror), and man, the dreams were crazy.
I cannot remember all of them, but two of them stand out the most.
One was a flying dream. I remember how delighted I was at the freedom, and how sad I was when I woke up
There was definitely something else here, but I cannot remember.
The other lengthy one was a dream about escaping this prison with my dream girlfriend (I think it wasn't my real girlfriend in the dream, but I considered the woman as having "GF" status, whoever it was). The prison was greenish, moist and with green stuff growing, so it wasn't really appealing. Kinda what you would see in horror movies and such.
We were somehow separated, but could see each other perfectly fine, like one meter between each other. She was in a bath for most of the time for some reason, possibly tied inside it, only her shoulders and head above the murky water with a wooden shackle around her neck. Green mud was splattered all over the bathtub.
Anyway, we somehow managed to escape. I remember us running away on a highway, clouds covering the sky. Cracked, dry dirt was around the highway, with nothing else in sight except for the grubby, abandoned prison behind us.
Somewhere as we are running, we pop up into an empty bar of some kind, and start talking. She starts complaining..
- Where can we go now? You haven't thought this through.. we don't even have our passports!
- I was thinking maybe Canada.. but you are right, we don't have passports.. maybe we can sneak into Canada on boats?
- No. We are going back to the prison and taking our passports.
For some reason, when she said going back to the prison, I knew she wanted to return to her captivity. I accepted, for it felt right. As if being bound and imprisoned was a fate worthy of a man.
We went back to the prison, and I saw her shackled in the murky bathtub water again, a wooden plate covering the whole top, with just a small hole for her head.
But I knew in myself that this wasn't something I would accept. I was concocting a plan to get those scraps of papers. I would get out of there, and be free yet again.. even if nothing was keeping me in the prison, for there never were any guards, only me myself as the lone incarcerator.
And yet again, I saw myself running from the greenishly stained prison, down the highway, away from it's metal fences and high tower, cold wind hitting me in the back, only the endless road and wastes in sight.
The dark clouds signal the battle hidden inside the subconscious; not an inch back, for the battle is being won.
Absolutely.
Decided to try out a new volume schedule. I found out that middle range volumes don't really work for me. It's either low or high, there ain't no middle path here.
Therefore, I'm going to be running and testing 5 days of low, followed by 2 days of high. My theory for this is that the 5 days of low will allow the subconscious to plan and prepare, start digging methodically, let the suggestions imprint.. and then hit it with the full force of DMSI, ordering it to act upon those suggestions and follow them.
Like a priming effect.
Yesterday was the first day of this cycle (after the day of really loud where I stuck through the terror), and man, the dreams were crazy.
I cannot remember all of them, but two of them stand out the most.
One was a flying dream. I remember how delighted I was at the freedom, and how sad I was when I woke up
There was definitely something else here, but I cannot remember. The other lengthy one was a dream about escaping this prison with my dream girlfriend (I think it wasn't my real girlfriend in the dream, but I considered the woman as having "GF" status, whoever it was). The prison was greenish, moist and with green stuff growing, so it wasn't really appealing. Kinda what you would see in horror movies and such.
We were somehow separated, but could see each other perfectly fine, like one meter between each other. She was in a bath for most of the time for some reason, possibly tied inside it, only her shoulders and head above the murky water with a wooden shackle around her neck. Green mud was splattered all over the bathtub.
Anyway, we somehow managed to escape. I remember us running away on a highway, clouds covering the sky. Cracked, dry dirt was around the highway, with nothing else in sight except for the grubby, abandoned prison behind us.
Somewhere as we are running, we pop up into an empty bar of some kind, and start talking. She starts complaining..
- Where can we go now? You haven't thought this through.. we don't even have our passports!
- I was thinking maybe Canada.. but you are right, we don't have passports.. maybe we can sneak into Canada on boats?
- No. We are going back to the prison and taking our passports.
For some reason, when she said going back to the prison, I knew she wanted to return to her captivity. I accepted, for it felt right. As if being bound and imprisoned was a fate worthy of a man.
We went back to the prison, and I saw her shackled in the murky bathtub water again, a wooden plate covering the whole top, with just a small hole for her head.
But I knew in myself that this wasn't something I would accept. I was concocting a plan to get those scraps of papers. I would get out of there, and be free yet again.. even if nothing was keeping me in the prison, for there never were any guards, only me myself as the lone incarcerator.
And yet again, I saw myself running from the greenishly stained prison, down the highway, away from it's metal fences and high tower, cold wind hitting me in the back, only the endless road and wastes in sight.
The dark clouds signal the battle hidden inside the subconscious; not an inch back, for the battle is being won.
(06-24-2017, 11:59 AM)Shannon Wrote: We don't make progress by doing what has always been comfortable.
Absolutely.
