12-09-2011, 07:33 PM
(12-09-2011, 11:10 AM)Shannon Wrote: Cortez, for some of us, "leaping outside your comfort zone" is far more traumatic than for others, and can cause lifelong scars. People like myself and Mat have typically become this way because we were "thrown" out of our comfort zones at least a few times when we were young, and genuinely needed the security it provided. Remember that not everyone will be affected the same way by what works for any one person.
Having grown a huge amount in the last five or six years myself, certainly more than I ever imagined I would, and primarily because of the Alpha set, I would say that my comfort zone now is miles further out, metaphorically speaking, than it used to be. That wasn't a quick transition, but with repeated use of the AM set and a steadfast refusal to be mistreated and trying to do the right thing, I got here and I'm still trucking. Just follow in my footsteps, Mat. Slow and steady wins the race. It won't happen overnight, but it will happen.
Thanks Shannon, I needed that. I need to stop being so hung up on the future and just enjoy the present moment. I think the one thing that's been causing me anxiety was this second stage of alpha male. I can't tell if it's resistance or the sub itself, but I've just been more irritable and kind of confrontational. But looking back this is exactly how I felt on my first run through and I feel like I had the exact same worry of becoming a jerk or callous and uncaring.
To me it makes sense though. Being a really sensitive individual, I would expect myself to have trouble with adapting to the role of a jerk. It's essentially me becoming the very thing that hurts me the most. I have noticed that I've stood up for myself more when needed so I'm thankful for that though. Still I've never really been able to go full blown jerk like some people. I'm just hoping I'm not negating the effects of this stage.
But hell any small change is usually enough to cause me a great deal of stress, so it shouldn't come as a surprise that this sub is having the same effect. Sometimes I just forget that my mind is processing a lot and I shouldn't feel bad if some days I don't feel as good as others. After all there is a lot going on behind the scenes that I may not be consciously aware of and I have to take that into account.
