11-19-2011, 06:44 PM
So the jerk has emerged once more haha. I'm definitely noticing my intolerance for people who try to take advantage of me or people who don't respect me. Like the other day I was walking on this paved path on my campus and noticed these two girls walking my way. Both these girls were taking up the entire walkway, like they owned it. I'm walking minding my own business expecting these girls to at least clear some amount of room so I can walk through without having to step into the grass. Nope, doesn't happen. So nice guy me would have walked around into the grass, but jerk me had other plans. Basically I just shoulder bump this girl and do not give a crap. I don't ask much from people, just show a little respect. There was no reason why they couldn't have made room for me.
Overreacting? Maybe. But I honestly don't care. I'm gonna do whatever the hell I want from now on. I think my prior run through of alpha I didn't let enough of that jerk out. I shouldn't feel bad about asserting myself. That's been my one mistake over the years, I felt guilty about telling other people no or standing up for myself. I also think a lot of my mind resisted the changes because they felt "wrong". This time around I'm just going to let go and stop trying to control so much. Whatever happens happens and it is part of the programming.
Overreacting? Maybe. But I honestly don't care. I'm gonna do whatever the hell I want from now on. I think my prior run through of alpha I didn't let enough of that jerk out. I shouldn't feel bad about asserting myself. That's been my one mistake over the years, I felt guilty about telling other people no or standing up for myself. I also think a lot of my mind resisted the changes because they felt "wrong". This time around I'm just going to let go and stop trying to control so much. Whatever happens happens and it is part of the programming.
