10-08-2011, 07:51 AM
It doesn't feel natural to approach or talk to women? In that case, you're framing it the wrong way. I consider it nothing more than a simple social interaction. I'm just talking to her, nothing more, no expectations. If she's giving me indicators of interest, she obviously wants to talk, right? So talk. You're probably putting too much into it - "oh, it's going to lead to sex, and if it doesn't, I've failed somehow...".
Forget that. Just talk to her. No expectations. Think of it this way: you are going to make her day better by giving her the pleasure of some decent conversation. And, in the process, you'll enjoy it too. And hey, if it leads somewhere, fine... but really, it doesn't matter, because you enjoyed some conversation with her. You made her day more enjoyable, you made your own day better, and you opened doors, even if you didn't necessarily go through them.
Remember also that she knows people you might find compatibility with. So what if it doesn't go beyond talking or friendship? Maybe her sister, cousin, or a friend would be more your style. And you still have her as a new friend to boot.
When you stop putting expectations in the mix, when you just approach with something entertaining to talk about and let things flow where they may, you'd be surprised how much better things go.
It sounds to me like you are restricting yourself out of fear, and you're seeing the results in nothing happening.
Forget that. Just talk to her. No expectations. Think of it this way: you are going to make her day better by giving her the pleasure of some decent conversation. And, in the process, you'll enjoy it too. And hey, if it leads somewhere, fine... but really, it doesn't matter, because you enjoyed some conversation with her. You made her day more enjoyable, you made your own day better, and you opened doors, even if you didn't necessarily go through them.
Remember also that she knows people you might find compatibility with. So what if it doesn't go beyond talking or friendship? Maybe her sister, cousin, or a friend would be more your style. And you still have her as a new friend to boot.
When you stop putting expectations in the mix, when you just approach with something entertaining to talk about and let things flow where they may, you'd be surprised how much better things go.
It sounds to me like you are restricting yourself out of fear, and you're seeing the results in nothing happening.
Subliminal Audio Specialist & Administrator
The scientist has a question to find an answer for. The pseudo-scientist has an answer to find a question for. ~ "Failure is the path of least persistence." - Chinese Fortune Cookie ~ Logic left. Emotion right. But thinking, straight ahead. ~ Sperate supra omnia in valorem. (The value of trust is above all else.) ~ Meowsomeness!
The scientist has a question to find an answer for. The pseudo-scientist has an answer to find a question for. ~ "Failure is the path of least persistence." - Chinese Fortune Cookie ~ Logic left. Emotion right. But thinking, straight ahead. ~ Sperate supra omnia in valorem. (The value of trust is above all else.) ~ Meowsomeness!
