09-01-2016, 07:09 PM
Day 43:
Hmm.. It's hard to explain what's going on with me right now. I definitely feel as though something has shifted deep within me. I guess this is what self worth and validation feels like. I'm not all the way there yet, but there seems to be a growth occurring.
I was out yesterday/today feeling pretty good, looking for female attention - got none. Now, this didn't hurt as much as it used to. I even had anger and worthiness issues come up and yet I'm still ok with me. The old and new beliefs are definitely playing ping pong in my mind. I have spent my whole life seeking validation/love/acceptance from outside myself, and I'm starting to understand why that's been so damaging to me.
I don't feel squeaky clean, that's ok. I'm caring a whole lot less about being 'perfect'.
Like fuck it, I'm me. That's beginning to feel like enough these days.
Hmm.. It's hard to explain what's going on with me right now. I definitely feel as though something has shifted deep within me. I guess this is what self worth and validation feels like. I'm not all the way there yet, but there seems to be a growth occurring.
I was out yesterday/today feeling pretty good, looking for female attention - got none. Now, this didn't hurt as much as it used to. I even had anger and worthiness issues come up and yet I'm still ok with me. The old and new beliefs are definitely playing ping pong in my mind. I have spent my whole life seeking validation/love/acceptance from outside myself, and I'm starting to understand why that's been so damaging to me.
I don't feel squeaky clean, that's ok. I'm caring a whole lot less about being 'perfect'.
Like fuck it, I'm me. That's beginning to feel like enough these days.
