AwesomeYoungDude's Alpha Journal

[Patti]

Stage 5 Week 3-4, Overcoming Procrastination 15-16, Week 4-5 Factor-A

• I've noticed that the sting of work is removed.  I don't know if its more exposure to AM11,  increase exposure to Overcoming Procrastination, Factor-A, or a combination of all three. This state is nirvana for me.  In this state work is not a chore or difficult.  Its work, but the challenges and fears of work, learning, reading, adapting, confronting, challenging, compromising, doing mundane task and work, work, work, etc are not a burden.  I don't fear or am bothered by tasks.  This state was my goal of using Shannon's subs along with other quests to improve myself over the past several years.  Hope this state has staying power.  Update: The phase lasted for 1.5 weeks and decreased with the decreased exposure to Overcoming Procrastination.
  
• Beginning to notice and understand "confidence in masculine core".  I'm not intimidated by things.  What use to be a blow to my ego or challenge which triggered a immediate defense is no longer.  I will tell you that I don't agree with you where in the past I would say nothing.  I'm refined in my approach.  
  
• I've been asked what's up with my voice and why has it changed.
  
• More notice from females.
  
• Way more romantic encounters with my wife :->
  
• I'm hearing the rustling of the leaves in the trees again.  The wind is picking up.  Maybe this time theirs pay dirt in that wind. Only time will tell.
  
• Started working out again and watching what I eat.
  
• I reduced the exposure to Overcoming Procrastination and found that my motivation drop to almost zero.  I will resume the use of it.  
  
• Strong desire to be my own man.  I have no desire to be a part of the herd and when confined to a herd, I'm marching to a different drummer.
  
• Strong confidence in my abilities at work.  I know I can make a change and I'm not afraid to "put  your money where your mouth is" on this.
  
• i'm very embolden in my communication with management and upper management.  A few months ago I worked to gain their respect.  Now I don't care if they respect me or not.  I don't care if I'm employed by this company or not, although I'm not looking to get fired, I'm just indifferent about working there.  
  

This stage had it's ups and downs. The ups where the best so far in this alpha journey.   The stage ended on the down side however.

Ok mister secret agent man, what the heck if factor A????? And why aren’t you sharing it with the class? Is it gender specific? Give me a hint….