mat422 alpha journal

[mat422]

A little self reflection and insight into what I'm going through. Progressing through these stages I've become less interested in women in general. Maybe this is just the upside down feeling that will go away after I'm done, but my emotions in general are very stoic. Prior to alpha the main reason I'd want to get girls is for the feel good feeling, like a drug. Well, basically those feelings don't come up anymore unless I interact with a really authentic awesome girl and I feel that connection. Whatever image I had of women before starting this set is long gone, and while it presents me with absolute freedom I also feel a loss in a way. I think most guys have these ideas or fantasies of what love is or how relationships are and it's just all been reinforced by the media.

But seeing as how I started stage 6 recently, the beginnings are always a little bumpy. Right now I want to do away with that war of the sexes thing that has become so popular. Women blaming men, men blaming women. It's a toxic discussion to get into and right now I'm still trying to purge myself of the stupid advice I've internalized over the years from pick up. A girl with high self esteem and being secure in herself wouldn't fall for those stupid tactics anyway. Yet a lot of pick up artists just assume that women are irrational or bitches.

Bottom line, quality and not quantity for me. One amazing girl would easily trump 50 mediocre ones.