Ampers&d: The Year of the Alpha (Male 6.0)

[Ampersnd]

Stage 4, Day 14,

This week was pretty cool. It was the last week of my one placement. I'm moving to a small town tomorrow afternoon. My stuff is packed up.

- Aced my placement; not only passed, but got 100% on the essential criteria.

- I wasn't able to meet with that doctor's daughter. Her reasoning makes sense; if we hit it off, or we're a perfect match, I'd be leaving anyways.

- I went for lunch with a work college; got a fancy Italian meal paid for;

- On Monday, I went to drinks for some ex-work colleagues (the job I left behind). I wound up having the hot girl drive me home. She got in my apartment, and she kept the conversation going. I went for it and made out with her. I got as far as having her boobies out, and my fingers rubbing her sex. She has the biggest and perkiest boobs I've had the pleasure of sucking on.

She kept saying, in fake-shock: "You're bad!". How I heard it: "I'm wet!"

She had to go home, as her, another co-worker, and her roommates, were going to smoke together, and the coworker was already at her place, creating a time constraint. She proposed a 'follow-up' for Wednesday, though I knew that it wouldn't turn out. Sure enough, she's on her period. My text response: "Are you bleeding from the mouth?". It got a laugh, but it didn't turn into anything after that.

- I'm realizing that I need 7.5-8.0 of sleep, and if I can get it, I wake up naturally before the alarm. Otherwise, I'm a zombie. I need to work on getting to bed earlier.

- Despite feeling good, I feel out of touch with where I want to go with my life, how I intend on getting there, how to become successful, etc. I'm still happy, so it's not a big issue.

- My Quarter 2 goals are coming along;

For one aspect, I do the Key Sound one day, and FaceBuilder, and maybe some stretching, the other. Key Sound: I experienced an intense rush of energy during a session, lasting one session. Rather orgasmic. This is working, after roughly 2 weeks.
FaceBuilder: I notice my face is more toned and movie-star-looking after using it. I look better overall.

Music: I can EASILY learn and memorize the lyrics of 5 songs a day. Takes probably 10 minutes of planning and 30 minutes upfront, plus 10 minutes for the following three days (about an hour). That said, the words of the song will stick after that period of time. I memorized 15 new songs over the last 5 days.

[FREAK4LIFE]

Stage 4, Day 14,

This week was pretty cool. It was the last week of my one placement. I'm moving to a small town tomorrow afternoon. My stuff is packed up.

- Aced my placement; not only passed, but got 100% on the essential criteria.

- I wasn't able to meet with that doctor's daughter. Her reasoning makes sense; if we hit it off, or we're a perfect match, I'd be leaving anyways.

- I went for lunch with a work college; got a fancy Italian meal paid for;

- On Monday, I went to drinks for some ex-work colleagues (the job I left behind). I wound up having the hot girl drive me home. She got in my apartment, and she kept the conversation going. I went for it and made out with her. I got as far as having her boobies out, and my fingers rubbing her sex. She has the biggest and perkiest boobs I've had the pleasure of sucking on.

She kept saying, in fake-shock: "You're bad!". How I heard it: "I'm wet!"

She had to go home, as her, another co-worker, and her roommates, were going to smoke together, and the coworker was already at her place, creating a time constraint. She proposed a 'follow-up' for Wednesday, though I knew that it wouldn't turn out. Sure enough, she's on her period. My text response: "Are you bleeding from the mouth?". It got a laugh, but it didn't turn into anything after that.

- I'm realizing that I need 7.5-8.0 of sleep, and if I can get it, I wake up naturally before the alarm. Otherwise, I'm a zombie. I need to work on getting to bed earlier.

- Despite feeling good, I feel out of touch with where I want to go with my life, how I intend on getting there, how to become successful, etc. I'm still happy, so it's not a big issue.

- My Quarter 2 goals are coming along;

For one aspect, I do the Key Sound one day, and FaceBuilder, and maybe some stretching, the other. Key Sound: I experienced an intense rush of energy during a session, lasting one session. Rather orgasmic. This is working, after roughly 2 weeks.
FaceBuilder: I notice my face is more toned and movie-star-looking after using it. I look better overall.

Music: I can EASILY learn and memorize the lyrics of 5 songs a day. Takes probably 10 minutes of planning and 30 minutes upfront, plus 10 minutes for the following three days (about an hour). That said, the words of the song will stick after that period of time. I memorized 15 new songs over the last 5 days.

hey dan,

How is memory going for you?

Is it as good as advertised or even better?

Could you elaborate on that a bit and how it is helping you out in your life?

Is it worth it or just some bullshit scam marketing?

[Benjamin]

My text response: "Are you bleeding from the mouth?". It got a laugh, but it didn't turn into anything after that.

Hahahaha classic! Awesome answer.

[Ampersnd]

FREAK4LIFE, it involves some planning, but it saves time in the long haul. I've applied it in a few areas and I am rather impressed. the real fun started with I could stop taking lessons, and start learning my own stuff. Not 100% sure how automatic reflex recall is, but a few experiences have shown enormous promise. Just do the lessons properly and you'll be well equipped

@Benjamin haha thanks man

[Shannon]

- On Monday, I went to drinks for some ex-work colleagues (the job I left behind). I wound up having the hot girl drive me home. She got in my apartment, and she kept the conversation going. I went for it and made out with her. I got as far as having her boobies out, and my fingers rubbing her sex. She has the biggest and perkiest boobs I've had the pleasure of sucking on.

She kept saying, in fake-shock: "You're bad!". How I heard it: "I'm wet!"

She had to go home, as her, another co-worker, and her roommates, were going to smoke together, and the coworker was already at her place, creating a time constraint. She proposed a 'follow-up' for Wednesday, though I knew that it wouldn't turn out. Sure enough, she's on her period. My text response: "Are you bleeding from the mouth?". It got a laugh, but it didn't turn into anything after that.

So in other words:

Smoking out > you, and she was trolling you. I'd have said, "You'd rather smoke weed than do this? Okay." And that would ave been the end of it. Anyone who prioritizes that sort of thing over being decent during what amounts to sex, is not respecting you and does not deserve your time. But that's just my oh-so-humble opinion. If she didn't want sex, then why not say, "I can't right now, I have to go hang with some people I planned to spend this evening with."? That would have been respectful. But to pull what she did? Troll. Disqualified.

Again... just my opinion.

[Ampersnd]

@Shannon: To her fairness, she spent the entire evening bugging the poor guy to join her roommates and her. He finally says 'yes' and has driven directly to her house. I was complicating things by throwing sex into the time-sensitive equation. She was respectful about letting me know. I see where you're coming from, and I myself will give her the charitable interpretation. Either way, I probably won't see her again.

Stage 4, Day 23 (but now 22 because I missed a day),

This portion of the stage has been pretty spectacular, in terms of personal development.
I mean, seriously; looking back to the person I am now compared to who I was two weeks ago completely boggles me.

Since my last post, my parents came back the next morning, and we packed the remainder of my apartment, and drove down to the new city. Felt a bit sad leaving, for the sake of my former sexual partner (the one I was seeing for months). I'm now living in this small town of 45,000 people until at least the month of July. I spent some time with extended family, and learned that my dad is willing to disown his dad if the relationship between his dad and his brother won't clear up. Boundaries! I could show him this subliminal.

I've since spent one week at my new placement, and it's been going great!

- I FINALLY owned up to the fact that I absolutely need to get enough sleep every night to function properly. For me, that number seems to be 8 hours a day. I set a steady bedtime on weekdays for 10pm, waking up at 6am. Since that change, I've had a significant increase in energy at work and after work.

- In the morning (6:05), I go straight to a playground behind the house and do hill sprints, chin-ups, push ups, etc. It helps me feel even more energy, awake, and charged. I listen to audiobooks while doing this, and also while having breakfast and doing other ablations.

- My placement is going kickass; I'm observing most interactions with clients. I had a writing board, and I fix Post-Its to them, writing new terms down when I don't recognize it. I'm writing so much down (new acronyms, terms, types of surgeries, medications, people's name) that I can fill a 1 page summary each day. The font size is 9 and the margins are very small (you could say 'marginal'). This has been impressing my supervisor, and I'm learning quickly. Calling people by their name makes them light up more than a nameless greeting. I walk around at work with a smile on my face.

- Key Sound has been satisfactory; each session is more intense than the last. During Friday's session, I had a series of what you could call very-mini-orgasms (1/10th of a normal one), as I was shuttering while making the sound, and feeling pleasurable sensations all around.

- FaceBuilder is going alright; I always look better than usual after the exercises. Hopefully, I can look like that most of the time.

- The most recent audiobooks I've listened to were 'The Talent Code' and 'The Compound Effect'.
o The Talent Code focuses on deliberate practice, so of course, I am practicing more and more accurately. I'm understanding that things that are difficult to play live are such because I didn't practice them well enough.
o The Compound Effect is about the gradual 0.1% improvement habits you make each day that add up over time - let's say, 3 years - to yield spectacular results. Habits like saving, losing weight, practicing, and so on. It's also big on the idea of tracking a particular metric. I'm considering doing it for guitar and the French language. I pretty quickly came up with a list of little tweaks I can throw into my day to make it 5% more effective. Things like climbing the stairs when first entering my job, speaking to my preceptor exclusively in French, writing down the tempos I can play a certain passage to be able to challenge myself adequately.

- Coming up with solutions for problems very easily; I was considering adding in a French-language related habit, so that I can speak more eloquently. I was bemoaning the idea, since I'm pretty strapped for time in the evening. Then, I realized that I can simply choose to speak in French to bilingual people as much as possible. Or listen to French language material. "But what happens to my audiobooks?!" I wonder, "..Maybe I just listen to French audiobooks". ¨Problem. solved.

- Learning about 15 song lyrics per week. If I keep the habit going for about 2 weeks, and I'll at 60 songs total. I'll stop it shortly thereafter, since I don't even know if I'll get to perform those songs anyways. Better off directly my pMemory skills towards guitar theory, which should be interesting.

- Today was Saturday; I got up at 8, starting working on my day around 9:15, and didn't stop until 5. I jumped back in at 7pm and went until 11pm. I WANTED to do that. Wow! I got a whole lot done.

- I've ACTUALLY cut out Facebook, Youtube, and pointless sites, during week day. I'll admit that I clicked on Sub Talk a couple of times this week.

It's as though my new environment acts as a signal and an opportunity to introduce as many new things as possible. So much more space than my small bachelor apartment, so it's easy to separate my laptop from my bed, and pull out the ironing board, etc.

Long winded, I know. But it's pretty incredible stuff.

[Ampersnd]

Stage 4, Day 29,

This week was also very disciplined, but my quality of character has taken a hit; this is definitely a temporary phase. I'm less focused, less assertive, less energetic, less grounded than I was the previous weeks.. or at least more aware about it than I was last week. I've been dousing my mind in the trickling stream this week.

The biggest indicator is my voice; I'm used to being able to speak deeply, and I often get comments about my baritone voice. Today, it's higher and nasally.

I shift around often and don't have great posture. I'm also pretty tired at the moment, so the change to come is requiring some energy now.

On the topic of productivity, I've had a couple of discoveries; the first is that a lot of the busywork that I'm doing yields very little, and in so doing, I'm leaving no time available to do the things that are truly important (Think 80/20). Allow me to explain:

Each evening, I sit down and practice songs on the guitar. That's fine and good, but I really don't need to learn any new songs, and it won't make me a better guitarist to the core. Instead, I'll use that time to learn scale patterns and some theory, and practice those patterns with a metronome so that I can learn the guitar neck inside and out, and be able to improvise.

I'm also using up a lot of time learning songs, which I realize that I won't need to use. In the next two days, I'll be finishing up the final songs on my list - just so that I actually finish what I started - and I'll allot that time in song writing. These new activities are much more high leverage, since in one year, I'll have developed those skills to a great extent. There's only so much that learning songs will do to my skill levels.

I've improved at work. Nothing much to say on that, but I'm more at ease with the process.

I'm considering investing in Mike Gillette's Strength Psychology program, since I often lose my cool when things get real. Seems like a good deal for 39$.

[Ampersnd]

Stage 4, Day 29,

Have been cutting out useless things from my life, and I've noticed that I have more time in my day than I realize. Useless stuff (learning new songs lyrics that I won't use, and new songs on guitar) won't make me a better player. The lyrics end after tomorrow; I'll just have to review them for a few days straight, which will take up less time.

Instead, I'm working on theory, motor skills, and improvisation, using pMemory to help me. I've already created a system that I can start using on Tuesday.

I've been using a daily tracking sheet that I've been using on weekdays, which allow me to track my French language, my guitar playing, and my voice exercises.

Not a whole lot else is different.

Edit: Oh yeah, I fixed a major Internet issue that I had, in which my Internet connection kept reactivating a proxy server, making me have to stop what I was doing, go back to the control panel, and tick off the box. Fixing this issue will open me up to faster action, saving time.

[Ampersnd]

Stage 4, Day 32,

Ironically, I'm ending Stage 4 feeling worse about myself than I did at the start of the program; my posture is bad, my voice is weak, and I'm shifty. I keep staring at women at work, and I'm not all that composed. I keep making uncalibrated statements to my bosses.

Not complaining, cause I know it's going to change when I switch on Stage 5.

[Ampersnd]

Stage 5, Day 4,

If my life continues as it's going, it will become incredible in two years.

Let's talk about the main difference; my habits.
I've got all the good habits in place, but I'm now cutting out the unnecessary to have more time for the high-leverage things.

- I'm feeling the compound effects of the actions I've started taking in the past three weeks. My stomach is tighter from all those hill runs, my guitar theory is much better, and my daily habits are becoming easier and easier to do.

- My books came in through the mail; Maximum Achievement by Brian Tracy, and Winning Through Intimidation by Robert Ringer. I'm about 60 pages into the book by Brian Tracy.

- I'm doing pMemory exercises for guitar theory; I'm working on the notes of the fretwork. I've just made a list of motor skills I want to practice on the guitar.

- I've decided to push all 'catch-up' work to the weekends, so that I waste less time on daily tasks. I just take care of all of it at once on one day. For example, I learn pMemory things on the weekend, and then review it each day of the week until it's deep in my subconscious.

- I've removed song learning (as mentioned before) and other time wasters.

- I'm using Anki flashcards again (was using them back in 2013) for French and medications, both areas where I'm not going to schedule blocks of time. I'm currently learning 15 new units a day.

- More grounded, deeper voice, body language kicked up a notch. Sense of humor kicked up a notch.

- Productive and hard working; I just spent all of Saturday tackling all my goals. Playing some Banjo-Kazooie was written on my goals list, and I forced myself to play at the end of the day. It's fun, but the damn crab from Treasure Trove Cove killed me at 89 notes. I guess I could move on to the next level next time.

Some challenges:

- I'm coming up against the issue of "I can't" more and more. I feel that the subliminal is pulling up my issue to the surface, and so I believe I will soon overcome it.

- Near zero sex drive, which could be in some way a VERY good thing, as I'm in a small town with very few attractive, single women. I'd go crazy if I had the opposite issue. I can focus on my tasks, so I must be channeling that energy.

[Ampersnd]

Stage 5, Day 6,

I'm starting to notice the effects of Stage 5..

Reading Brain Tracy's Maximum Achievement has help me realize that the inner world is tantamount. The outer world is a big mirror, and I am able to make changes to my subconscious mind without needing subs (though it's a slower process).

My thoughts and attitudes are more 'straight-lined'. I've created real goals that are specific and attainable (but slightly tough to attain), as opposed to ubiquitous goals that can be interpreted one of several ways. I'm feeling more optimistic, but my feelings are teeter-tottering; I feel that my attitudes towards various areas are improving, but my subconscious is trying to pull me back. I'm making sure that I'm exposed to more positive things than negative.

- I've decided the general city in which I want to live, because if I don't choose a city, someone else will pick it for me. I'll pick a more specific area after consulting with people who have lived there.

- I've decided the field and the salary that I want. Though it's "low", it's more money than I've ever made in my life, so it's challenging AND realistic to strive for it, until I get it, and I'll start shooting higher. I've been applying for jobs in the aforementioned city.

- I've focused on specific skills that I want to hone, with VERY specific things that I want to hone, and how I will go about achieving them.

- I need to figure out how to learn recording engineering, especially as I'll be jumping from city to city.

- I have a goal to buy BAMM by the end of my 2nd run of AM6. I strive to be an ideal candidate (i.e. I get accepted).

Will keep you all posted

[Ampersnd]

Stage 5, Day 10,

More subconscious pushback for my new way of seeing things.
This morning, I had a woman conducting a discussion group; she happens to be the sexual assault program manager (probably ardent feminist), and made some wise cracks, likely as innocuous jokes. My brain came up with a set of talking points, and I was getting pissed off. I was taking the whole thing out of proportion; I kept telling myself: "I'm responsible. I'm responsible".

I start my mornings by saying: "I believe something wonderful will happen to me today". I'm noticing that I'm integrating into the social group at work a bit better, but I'm changing departments next week.

I got my review for the first rotation; turns out I've had an issue with focus. If I'll be honest with myself, I keep checking out the girls in the pod. There are so many attractive women who are nurses, cleaners, occupational therapists, etc. All of varying ages. I can look but I can't touch.

I decided to stop the cycle and focus on my focus muscle, as this shortcoming will obviously appear in every other element of my life (reading, self-improvement, studying, guitar, singing, etc.) Ive been using Mike Gillette's 'Strength Psychology' exercises, which involve intense focus for short bursts. Today, at work, I was much better with focusing on my job.

My sense of humor is pretty good; I can get plenty of people laughing at various topics.

I'm entering a new realm of guitar playing; I'm entering into a more 'advanced' ability. I've begun something called Economy Picking, which will make fast playing much easier. Learning theory, the notes of the fretboard, the scale forms; things that I tried to learn before but was not disciplined enough to make it work.

Plus, I'm applying my guitar motor skills to integrate into future playing situations, making me prepared for new playing situations. It was one of those realizations where I said to myself: "I wouldn't be on this level of thinking even 12 months ago". I'll have this feeling towards singing soon, as I'll be dedicating more time to it at some point. I'm currently doing singing drills every single day of the week.

Life is pretty good. I can't complain. If I think of new things, I'll add them this weekend.

Oh, one complain. I feel like more voice got higher. Or it was always that way, and I was deluding myself. I'll consider the masculine voice sub if it's ever available.

[Benjamin]

Cool, I got that Mike Gillette course but so far i've only listened to the intro. He comes across as a legitimate badass and that's not something i'd say often. How you liking the course?

[Ampersnd]

@Benjamin; there's a lot of fluff. Quite frankly, there's a lot of "what to do", and not enough of "how to do it". The only practical video is found under 'mind strengthening exercises'. I've been applying some of the steps for a couple of minutes everyday. I'll have to set my alarm a few minutes earlier to do more of it

He is a complete badass, which is why I'll test his exercises out before I dismiss him.

Stage 5, Day 11,

Realizing that I probably should become more adroit; I should draw the line at down syndrome jokes. Sure, they're funny.. to me. But who knows who I'll be offending. Same with interrupting, even when the person is completely wrong or on the wrong track. My interpersonal skills require a tune-up. Gonna read some books on it.

Finished Maximum Achievement; it's worth re-reading. I tried the exercise to activate the superconsciousmind; I sat on a rock for 60 minutes in stillness, and nothing really came from it, except I had the idea of trying a couple of things on the loop pedal, I was looking at a new battery powered amp today, and I just finished watching a documentary of buskers. So perhaps that's the direction I'll be headed in; Hello, old friend. Wait till you see what I've been up to..

Going to start reading 'Winning Through Intimidation'; I hear it's a great book, so I picked it up on Amazon.

I'm becoming more uncertain and realizing what I don't know about my job, which I realize is a good thing. It shall motivate me to pass my internships.

Still in the midst of working on guitar skills and singing skills; another area where I'm realizing there's always more to learn.