@ Lionking
But this exclusivity-honesty issue is what breaks my open/honest/vulnerable "strategy", because that's not something I can be open with right from the get go. So after she gets to see who I am a little better, but the question is: is there a "moral limit" somewhere. I'd bet some would say its before sex, but really I think the getting to know each other only starts after that, when the pressure is off of her. That's the first occasion I think she might have a good feel of what I'm about, when we've typically seen each other 2 or 3 times. "When a relationship starts to form" feels like somewhere after our 2nd or 3rd hookup.
seeing other girls and delaying the actual verbals as long as you can and deflecting the first times she asks it, but I don't like it. I had one girl start to develop feelings for me, and when I told her I'm not looking for a relationship she said she knew that quite well, but that she still somehow made herself believe it might be happening. Haven't seen her since. And this was a girl who saw me with a few other women in clubs and knew our group of guys always talked to girls. Anyway, that creates internal conflict for me and takes the fun out of it.
The way I see it we are vulnerable 24/7 but its more of a do I choose to be more vulnerable. When approaching women it takes a lot of balls man , because your ego can only take so much.
Here is a formula that I came up with while overly thinking at work today ; Intuition - which is a feeling , then you have knowledge which is more of an acceptance thing , and then you have trust which is taking action. At some point in time that formula will pop - up. Its more of hey am I being true to myself and what do I really want ,the thruth starts with you. The relationship is being formed from the get go. if goes forward if doesn't it doesn't .
But this exclusivity-honesty issue is what breaks my open/honest/vulnerable "strategy", because that's not something I can be open with right from the get go. So after she gets to see who I am a little better, but the question is: is there a "moral limit" somewhere. I'd bet some would say its before sex, but really I think the getting to know each other only starts after that, when the pressure is off of her. That's the first occasion I think she might have a good feel of what I'm about, when we've typically seen each other 2 or 3 times. "When a relationship starts to form" feels like somewhere after our 2nd or 3rd hookup.
seeing other girls and delaying the actual verbals as long as you can and deflecting the first times she asks it, but I don't like it. I had one girl start to develop feelings for me, and when I told her I'm not looking for a relationship she said she knew that quite well, but that she still somehow made herself believe it might be happening. Haven't seen her since. And this was a girl who saw me with a few other women in clubs and knew our group of guys always talked to girls. Anyway, that creates internal conflict for me and takes the fun out of it.
The way I see it we are vulnerable 24/7 but its more of a do I choose to be more vulnerable. When approaching women it takes a lot of balls man , because your ego can only take so much.
Here is a formula that I came up with while overly thinking at work today ; Intuition - which is a feeling , then you have knowledge which is more of an acceptance thing , and then you have trust which is taking action. At some point in time that formula will pop - up. Its more of hey am I being true to myself and what do I really want ,the thruth starts with you. The relationship is being formed from the get go. if goes forward if doesn't it doesn't .
It always seems impossible until it's done."_ Nelson Mandela
"Continuous improvement is better then delayed perfection."_ Mark Twain
"We change the world not by what we say or do, but as a consequence of what we have become. " _ Dr. David Hawkins
