Mateunio's Life Tune Up 5G 3.1 Journal

[Mystic Pymp]

Day 21

I just saw Poland winning Volleyball World Championship. I'm sure this wouldn't be possible without Shannon's subs! I can't wait to see Polish team winning Football World Cup 2018!

Seriously though, I feel much better now. Negativity decreased significantly and proved to be nothing but temporary bad humor. It left me however a bit unmotivated and procrastinating.

[Shawn]

I just saw Poland winning Volleyball World Championship. I'm sure this wouldn't be possible without Shannon's subs!

How do you mean that?

[Mystic Pymp]

I just saw Poland winning Volleyball World Championship. I'm sure this wouldn't be possible without Shannon's subs!

How do you mean that?

I was making fun of Shannon's marketing hacks, especially those quotes he takes from testimonials and journals. While I read those I wonder how come he still didn't figure out cure for cancer or way to send people to the Mars. Oh well, I'm sure 6G will do that AND MORE, with highest quality unlike anyone else in this industry

[Mystic Pymp]

Day 25

It's hard to believe I'm listening to this sub for almost a month now. I never managed to stay loyal to one track for this long and I can see why - there is definitely something to it. There are a ton of changes I've noticed, all of them minor and on its own insignificant, but when you look at the big picture it all presents itself very nice and promising. I think next update will be some sort of summary for past month to see how much progress was made and what I can hope for after 4 months of listening.

Anyhow past half-week went quite well. All my stresses are gone and I am just to wait for beginning of the academic year. I will provide me with new challenges, some old and familiar and some of them new, but I think I am ready to face them. Right now I'm very optimistic and in a very good shape overall. To be honest I can't remember when I felt like this last time, but whenever it was it must have been a long time ago.

[Mystic Pymp]

Day 33

I wanted to do a summary, but I simply couldn't. The reason is simple - it's hard for me to evaluate my progress. It's all been very varied recently. Sometimes I feel great, optimistic and over the moon, but other times I fell down and I want only to be left alone. Because of this it's hard to say if there was a progress of how much of it there was.

This week had been good so far, or at least as good as I could hope. Moving into the new flat and start of academic year brought some stress and in this situation LTU is of little help, but when stress free everything was quite good. I befriended my new flatmates and it's easy for me to find common tongue with them. I got used to new environment quickly and soon I'll feel in there like home.

I listen to LTU less than in September, only about 10 hour per day. I try to listen to it whenever I can, but playing it on speakers isn't good idea and I can only listen so much on headphones. I still listen to it during the night. I think it's still enough and maybe it's even for the better because I will have now studying and social life to focus on, but I'll try to catch up a bit during the free weekend.

One interesting thing I've noticed in my thinking is that I am quite optimistic that I will find a girlfriend during this academic year. And it's not a wishful thinking, it's more like an intuition. I'm not entirely sure if it's a good think because since forever it's been source of my complexes. One of the reasons why I started LTU was to understand that I don't need to prove anything by having a girlfriend, and instead I'm confident I'll find one.

[Mystic Pymp]

Day 40

This was quite a week. I was much more sociable than before and other people gave me much less stress and discomfort. I'm finding it very easy to get along with my flatmates and it's almost as if I knew them since forever! There are arguments, it's obvious with so much testosterone on 60 m^2, but nothing major or lasting. I was certainly worried it would be much worse. Also I got used to new places and classes very quickly, typically it would take me at least a month to fell comfortable.

The most important thing that happened by far was me going to the concert on Thursday. I went there almost against myself and I'd almost back out as my friend was sick and didn't want to go, but we went anyway and it was great decision. I had very good time and even though I didn't met new people my friend said he never saw me so relaxed and open. To be honest I didn't felt that different, but he knows me well so there must be something to it.

Things are not so good at my classes though. I fell more distant and awkward there now. It's harder for me to get along and have conversation with people there. I don't know why, I hope with time this field will get better, because I'd certainly appreciate good relations with my fellow students and it's hard to do when you feel like an intruder in most conversations.

[Mystic Pymp]

Day 44

Earlier update, but there are some things I wanted to save for future reference.

I've had much better contact with people past few days. Awkwardness that marked my interactions at my University vanished, at least with some of the people. I was much more sociable and even volunteered to take part in my students research circle, but I don't know if I'll be able to deliver. Why?

Because I got sick. I was thinking about using MIR, but I barely have money to buy it now, and anyhow according to Shannon's description it's to late to make use of it. I'd rather stay in bed as much as possible and drink hot tea with honey and lemon. It's just a cold attacking my nasal sinus, nothing life threatening.

After I read instructions for BASE I keep thinking every now and then what should I listen to after I end my LTU. I still have 2.5 month of it (at least), but still having a plan will help me setting some goals and knowing what to focus on. At the beginning I was planing to go LTU->AM(If LTU worked)->WM(if necessary). But now with BASE it's not that easy, not to mention 1000$ for AM+WM is quite a lot for poor student like myself. There are other options, but I like those "packages" like AM and BASE. Something to think about during long, autumn nights, it will depend on what I will want to focus on. So far AM+WM option wins slightly.

[LogicMan]

Hi Mateunio, I have enjoyed very much reading your updates and am glad you have carried on through the tough times when they have happened, I think that is the key to most things in life. Very much look forward to see how things go for you in the coming months!

Dave

[Mystic Pymp]

Thanks for kind words demo84 It's good to hear someone enjoys reading this journal.

Day 46

Short update as something almost strange is happening. Sickness is almost gone now, in big part because I had day off today and I could lay in my bed whole day under warm blanket, as I should have from the start. Anyhow as sickness of body is leaving sickness of mind came and I'm not sure why. I fell like lying in bed is the only thing I want to do and I'm almost paralyzed. The only comparable feeling I can think of is having a broken heart, but without any visible cause. I don't know if it's LTU working and breaking some resistance or Autumn's weather taking it's toll, but I hope this will pass and will leave me stronger than before.

Night update

This feeling went away and in the evening I was able to easily socialize with my flatmates. I even was invited to a party, but I refused not to risk being sick again. I fear it may come back though.

[Mystic Pymp]

Day 48

I almost feel as if all my progress with LTU went to waste. Procrastination scored great victory today and the only thing I accomplished was completing some missions in "Shadow of Mordor". I was listening to music on Youtube in the evening jumping from one suggestion to the other and even though I started with cheerful Indie Rock the only song I vibed with was "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" by Green Day. I didn't want to go further than that. I feel weak and scared, weighted even though my burdens aren't really that heavy those days. I'm even tired from writing this post. I almost want to stop listening to LTU, to give myself some rest but I know I can't. It's still early and response like that is only natural if LTU does it's job. I think I need to find a goal, a purpose to keep me going when simple surviving isn't enough, but how to find it? No sub can help me with this.

On other topic I've read some topics and journals on the forum and I've decided 100% percent to go with Alpha Male. BASE sounds great, but it won't help me develop as much as AM will I think. I fear though that my foundations are way to weak for AM and even next 2.5 months of LTU won't prepare them well enough for me to be able to do something with AM.

[Mystic Pymp]

Day 49

Hola Mateunio,

this feeling will pass in a day or two. Your foundation is not too weak for anything. You question yourself; good. This will happen on and on but with every time you will detach a bit more from the associated feelings. You will experience them non the less, but you will realize that they are not you. They are like rain or storm. In time you will start to smile and laugh about those emotional waves as you become aware that you are not some leaf afloat on top of them but rather a strongly rooted plant swayed by them.


All the best.

Raz

Thanks Raz, I see you say it out of experience what makes it so much more valuable. I think you are right, I am well rooted but I'm scared storm might turn me over as it sometimes does with giant trees. But I'm not big tree, am I? I'm still growing and I'm still flexible.

[Mystic Pymp]

Day 50

If two days ago was terrible this day was wonderful. I was really optimistic and up-beat, I've done almost everything I was to do (which were quite a lot of things) and I was easily able to fight my procrastination. I've made my schedule for entire weekend busy with all kinds of social events (something I'd shy away from normally, now I take them as an opportunity), one of them totally unexpected and it felt I almost manifested it. People we kind and sun was shining. I hope it's not another crest of the wave, but start of a trend that's gonna continue indefinitely

[Mystic Pymp]

Day 51

Sinusoidal reached bottom again as I met my nemesis today. All suppressed memories, wasted chances and lines better not crossed have stricken me and wounded me where used to be healed scars. I will heal again now and sinusoidal will rise again, for longer this time I'm sure.

[Shannon]

Waves of conflicting experience indicate that there is a growing dichotomy within you with the new/positive gaining strength against the old/negative. It gains momentum until it breaks through and permanently overpowers the old/negative, but as the old/negative fights for survival, the process can be somewhat "sinusoidal" as you put it. Keep going.