SargeMaximus: Blooming to Alpha

[Determined]

Awesome progress man.

Besides sitting next to you, what other evidence do you have that she's "interested" in you?

[SargeMaximus]

Awesome progress man.

Besides sitting next to you, what other evidence do you have that she's "interested" in you?

Thanks, and good question. I guess none really. She did the "hair-behind-the-ear" IOI but that could have been just because she wanted to be comfortable.

She had dilated pupils at one point but it could have been the subject matter.

We talked a lot (and other people joined in. Something that hasn't happened to me without using DMSI)

Yeah, nothing really.

[SargeMaximus]

People talk to me a lot.

I've been invited to go drinking which I gracefully declined.

I also noticed I often have very negative assumptions about events. I just assume it's the worst, even if it doesn't make sense. Kind of crazy.

[SargeMaximus]

Some good notables:

- Talking is just normal to me now. I don't sweat too much about messing up but I also can perform some cool ninja moves in convos to keep from getting stuck in negative or dead topics. It's actually pretty cool when I catch myself doing it. Also, people talking to me so much means I can talk a lot without having to start the convos, which I love.

- It's like I can just be around people and convos develop naturally now.

- Messed up with that girl online but learned a few things, so it's all good.

- Still feel I'm missing a bunch of stuff. Reading and listening to all the material I can for social skills and PUA stuff.

- Noticing I'm thinking less about "accomplishing" things via convo and instead just riding the good vibes and not riding the bad ones.

[SargeMaximus]

Saving this so it doesn't get lost:

And that's why we gave up on you, Sarge. You just compared apples to asteroids to prove your point and not have to change. Have fun with that.

K, I'm trying here and this is what I get. *facepalm*

It's not about not having to change, it's about understanding how the world works.

Am I not correct when I say that if someone believed they could fly, went to the top of a skyscraper, and walked off the edge, am I not correct to say that their beliefs would not matter and they'd still be subject to gravity?

I don't see how women and attraction is any different. Maybe I just don't understand how it's different. Nothing you've said shows me how it's different.

There is what I was talking about, which is the psychology of perception, belief, choice and action resulting in a change externally (apples)... and there is arbitrarily deciding to believe the laws of physics no longer function on a whim. (asteroids)

You missed the point so completely that it's mind boggling, and this is exactly what I am talking about. You demonstrated my point in doing this. What you believe to be true, becomes your reality internally and thus externally as a result.

You believe that there is black and there is white, and no shade of gray exists. This is the only way to explain what results when I say what I do. The only way you can conceivably even try to compare apples to asteroids is if you see no difference between them.

Black and white thinking misses 99% of "what is" because 99% of "what is", isn't pure black or white.

You say that it disproves my point to say that beliefs create one's reality because choosing to believe that gravity doesn't exist fails to negate it. But I didn't say that you can change the laws of physics by simply trying to ignore them, which is what your example boils down to.

I said that by changing what you believe to be true, you change what you accept as true, and what you accept as true guides your point of view, your emotional and intellectual experience, your choices, actions, reactions and thus experience of the world around you.

If I believe that the world is black and white, then anything that is not white must be black by definition. All that is not good automatically becomes evil. All that is not perfect is infinitely flawed. All that is not an absolute... does not even exist. This creates a situation in which you try to force all things to fit into a binary expression, when they do not. Rainbows do not consist of black or white. Almost nothing does, in fact. Which means that you must necessarily misunderstand and mis-perceive all things that are not absolutes, and that's just about... everything.

I'll try to simplify this a bit.

Little boy A decides that he has no reference point for how he is or should be perceived by the group. Little boy B decides he's cool and doesn't care what the group thinks.

A will necessarily have to ask the group... "What should I think of myself?" The group, upon seeing that question, concludes that A is "not cool", because cool people never ask that question. They're cool and they know it.

B will simply assume he is cool, and the group will see that expressed in his actions, attitude, speech, body language, beliefs, choices and reactions. These all communicate "I'm cool" as a result, which the group recognizes as being the behavior of cool people, and assumes he is cool.

"Being cool" is a point of opinion. Nothing more. Everything else results from the belief that the person is or is not cool in response to what they communicate about that status. If I think I'm cool, most people will assume I am cool if I communicate that with a strong enough point of reference that does not fade when someone challenges it. Being uncool is only a state of opinion, and likewise only exists in the mind. It can only exist in the mind of the person if they choose to believe it is true. It can only exist in the mind of the perceive if they choose to believe that it is true.

Little boy A asks, "Am I cool?" and displays the behavior of someone other than the leader, and is therefore not "cool". The response is, "No, you are not cool." Little boy A believes what the group has told him is true (accepts an external reality internally) and then makes that reality true by accepting it as true and acting as if it is true.

Little boy B never asks, "Am I cool?". He simply assumes he is cool, and doesn't care what anyone else thinks. This is the behavior of a leader, which the group associates with "cool" and they therefore take his communication as true - he believes he is cool without us telling him so, and therefore he must know something we don't, so we accept him as being cool. The moment they do, they now believe he is cool and accept it as true, and their resulting choices and actions perpetuate that reality, thus making it true externally as a result.

"Cool" is entirely subjective. This means that A can later decide, "I'm cool and I don't care what others think." and have the same thing happen - others see the change in communication from "I'm uncool" to "I'm cool" and they accept it as true, thus making it true.

Vice versa can also happen.

Reality is not black and white. You cannot simply decide that the law of gravity no longer applies to you and float away without some pretty advanced mastery of the whole of the laws of the universe and how to use them. Since almost nobody has that level of knowledge or mastery, nobody has ever seen such a thing before, and their reality becomes: it's impossible. Let's presume for the sake of brevity that it is, indeed, impossible. Let's say that the laws of the universe are in fact perfectly understood by humans, all of them are known, and none of them can be bent, used against each other, transcended or broken. This leaves us with the state of affairs that one cannot simply decide to walk off a building and fly.

But there is more to the universe than black and white. There are laws and laws that govern laws and laws we don't know about yet. There are things we can directly change and control and things we cannot and things in between.

I can change what I believe. If I do, my point of view changes to match that new belief. That adjusts my reaction to the conditions of the world around me, and that adjusts my choice of actions. It also adjusts how the world reacts to me, and thus, what I experience.

The world is what it is at the same time it is what I think it is. One of them relies on things outside my control, and one relies on things within my control. But I am limited to what I can perceive and understand, and that is based on my beliefs and my limits which are created by my beliefs, and my beliefs and thus my limits are a choice I make. The universe is a blank slate, and what you believe creates the limits that shape your perception of it. Those perceptions result in your understanding of it, which creates the beliefs you form about it, which result in the choices you make and the actions you take and the way those actions affect the world around you and thus what happens because of and to you in response, which then feed back into that and are interpreted by you according to those points of view and understandings and beliefs, which then perpetuate the reality you think you perceive because of those beliefs and points of view.

Thus... what you believe is what becomes your reality. To the carpenter, everything is understood through the lens of carpentry. To the photographer, everything is about light. To the SJW, everything is about injustice. To the racist, everything is about race. In reality the world is none of these things, because all of these become a facet of the true whole. It just depends on what you believe to be true, how you therefore limit yourself, and what you create as your reality by responding to your beliefs and the world around you through those beliefs, and then the response from the world around you to those actions and choices and beliefs.

I don't think you're going to understand what I'm trying to communicate, but there it is. By insisting that apples and asteroids are the same thing, and that my point is therefore disproven, you are only demonstrating that because of your beliefs, you limit yourself to a point of view that cannot comprehend the difference between apples and asteroids, and this causes my point to be lost because it isn't black or white, and therefore becomes inconceivable and thus "wrong" to you.

Great post, gave me a multitude of "light bulb moments" specifically pertaining to women and how that all might work. I'm trying to put my thoughts down so I don't just snap back to my old way of thinking, but it occurs to me that if you act a certain way, people respond a certain way to you, and that alone may be enough to "get" the women you want. :o

[SargeMaximus]

Today went out with some of the guys. I was actually going to a meeting with the one guy but ended up just hanging with the second guy. We talked for hours and walked around. Super easy to talk to him.

Then, at one point, this girl comes up to us and says "Hey boys, is there a bar in here?" (we were outside a hotel skyscraper) and I'm like "I dunno." she says "let's find out!" and walks inside.

We get inside and it turns out there is no bar there but the bellman says there might be one in the hotel across the street. She leaves.

Me and the guy ae texting with the other guy to find out when we should leave.

Long story short: we end up going into the other hotel and see the girl at the bar. I was gonna sit next to her but another guy swoops in and sits by her lightning fast. Damn. Oh well.

I guess that counts as an approach but I honestly don't think it was. She was just looking for ANY guy to party with, so I don't credit the snipers at all.

[SargeMaximus]

Today I had some brief moments of DMSI aura (I think) but it's so hard to tell. I'm just "setting and forgetting" it at this point. Running the prescribed 2 Loops a day.

[SargeMaximus]

So today was kind of testing a PUA technique out (mostly just maintaining strong EC) on the girl who's training me and the aussie.

She seemed to get annoyed at one point. She was circling things on a paper and she did it so viciously she tore the page several times.

In sales it was a HARD fought battle. I didn't get as many as I wanted. I still did good but every one was a struggle. It was exhausting.

Also, it was cold out and I didn't realize. I wasn't even freezing up but when I got in the car, the aussie's hands were going numb he said. Could be he's just not used to the weather, or it could be DMSI aura.

Also, was at the door with one guy who didn't want to do the thing. I was like "Think about the next people who'll have this house. Help a brother out" (I was trying to get him to do it for the people after him who'd benefit from it) But he says "Oh well if it's to help you out that's a different story" which I guess was him saying he'd do it for me, but I was like "nah man, just for the next people" then he was all like "no, I gotta go, I'm on the phone" (he did have his phone and earbuds/microphone hooked up and in his ears. But I dunno, just him seeming to entertain it IF it would help me out was strange.

Anyhow, not much else to report.

[SargeMaximus]

Today in training I got a bit flustered. I was trying to point out an issue I had but everyone was taking it as me just "bashing the training". So I decided to shut my mouth because I didn't know how to communicate in a way that wasn't taken as criticism. It was awful.

Our trainer says to me "Sarge, is there anything else you need? Anything you need explained?" and I just kept my mouth shut and waved my hands in a way that said "I'm not saying anything". Shortly thereafter she printed out a ton of material which helped a bit. So that was good.

I would have liked to be able to communicate my thoughts better though. I have no idea how to do that. People always seem to just take offence. That pattern is starting to annoy me and I know it means I have to change my approach, but I'm not sure what to change it to.

I wanted to tell her that we didn't have time to wait for me to write notes and it would be better to just have all the relevant info printed out, but like I said, they took offense to that suggestion so I just stopped talking.

The tragedy is: if I can't say what I need to say in a way that doesn't cause offense, my needs and thoughts go unheard because I'll just not say anything or people will be too focused on defending themselves than on what I'm actually talking about.

[4Kingdoms]

Hi Sarge. This was recommended to me through an Amazon.com email. Not sure why... not into "sales".
The Belief Economy: How to Give a Damn, Stop Selling, and Create Buy-In
https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/ref=...1619618044

I know you are a salesman, so I thought you might want to take a look.

[SargeMaximus]

Hi Sarge. This was recommended to me through an Amazon.com email. Not sure why... not into "sales".
The Belief Economy: How to Give a Damn, Stop Selling, and Create Buy-In
https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/ref=...1619618044

I know you are a salesman, so I thought you might want to take a look.

Cool man I'll check it out, thanks!

[SargeMaximus]

Just saw "The Last Jedi" with my aussie mate. It was AWESOME! By far, my favorite Star Wars Movie. Luke was SUCH a badass.

Not much else to say in that regard.

[SargeMaximus]

Craving junk food is full throttle. I want burgers, pizza, chips, fries, I also want lots of fruit. I just want to eat and eat and eat some more.

Looking into "Bulletproof Diet". It's supposed to be super good for your productivity, energy levels, cognitive abilities, and mood. Hoping it helps.

Got the day off and never celebrated Christmas so I'm just hanging out doing what I do.

I also want to start picking up girls but am terrified about learning PU methods because what if they work? What if they DON'T work, and all that. Just terrifying.

Part of me just wants to stay inside and watch movies, living vicariously so I don't have to face my fears, which is I'm sure what most people do.

I also want to become a great salesman and make a lot of money, so that I can eat, eat, and eat some more.

/random thoughts

[SargeMaximus]

Today noticing something I've noticed for a while but never really thought much of it. Today it's more pronounced, basically it's noticing how I'm getting more connected to positive stuff. Feelings, mindsets, outlooks, perspectives.

It's like my whole life I'm dooms-daying (expecting shit to hit the fan at any second) but now I'm starting to have thoughts about how actually life is pretty chill, fun, and positive.

It only comes in short bursts, then the dark clouds of "dooms-daying" cover it up, but it's getting more and more frequent, which is pretty cool.