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+--- Forum: Men's Journals (https://subliminal-talk.com/Forum-Men-s-Journals)
+--- Thread: Sean's AM Journal (/Thread-Sean-s-AM-Journal)
Sean's AM Journal - Sean - 08-27-2012
Hello,
I started AM 2011 Stage One on July 27. Today is the 31st day since I started, but I've missed a few weekends when I've had custody of my kids, so I'm not yet sure if I should switch to Stage Two tomorrow, or add a few days onto the Stage.
Over the past month, it's been rocky. There have been days of deep dark depression. Last Sunday, the 19th, I didn't leave my room for anything except the bathroom, until my buddy called me. I nearly passed on his dinner invitation, but some part of me said, "GTFO! You've been in this room all day, and you need to lean into your resistance to leaving. NOW!" That inner voice got me out.
Other days have been smooth and powerful. I'm more aware of my posture, and correct it. I haven't noticed a change in my walk, but eye contact is up 100 times over. I have always enjoyed flirting, but mostly with low-value targets, so there was little to lose. Also, it was mostly online, so there were no in-person pressures. Lately, I've just been slinging the flirty banter with strangers, walking away after without caring.
Sometimes, it's not even flirting, it's just the way I address a woman that is funny. Over the weekend, I stayed out of town for a trip with my boys. I had a fun conversation with the girl who made the reservations. She closed the conversation saying, "I'll see you in a few hours." When I got to the hotel, a guy was on the phone at the front desk while a woman was folding sheets behind him. I said I was there to check in, and she said he would help me when he was off the phone. Recognizing her voice, I said, "You must be Erica. I'm Sean." She stood there with her mouth half-open for a second, and I'm pretty sure I heard a tingling noise from between her legs. Then she stumbled over introducing herself, practically shoved the guy out of the way and got my check-in started.
I've become more calm over the past few weeks: dealing with my sons has become much more of a "Please do this" and they-do-it type of relationship, rather than frustration and yelling.
I feel like there are fewer obstacles in my life. When I have a decision to make, I spend less time thinking and more time executing on that decision.
And this is only the first stage. I'm eager to get into Stage Two, but I don't want to jump the gun: I want to get the maximum effect from this program.
RE: Sean's AM Journal - Shannon - 08-27-2012
And just think... you have 5 more stages to look forward to yet.
RE: Sean's AM Journal - Spiral - 08-27-2012
You sound like you are getting nice results so far. And it's good to see you are calm with your children as well. that's one thing I strive for when I have kids. Teach them right but do it politely of course while establishing authority when needed and only when needed.
As far as your listening.. count up how many days you missed and add that amount to the end of your 32nd day. so if you missed 3 days and you are on day 31 you should go up to day 35.
RE: Sean's AM Journal - Sean - 08-27-2012
OK. Six more days of Stage One, then I get to launch into Stage Two. Those custody weekends have been an obstacle I need to overcome. Usually we're all in the same room, and earbuds fall out when I'm sleeping. I'll figure something out.
RE: Sean's AM Journal - Sean - 08-29-2012
Something I've noticed the past few weeks: I'm waking up early, can't go back to sleep, and don't feel tired or fatigued. This happens when I've had the masked subliminal playing all night long, at an appropriate volume.
I've no patience for stupid or irritating things, but my reaction isn't disproportional. I have no road rage, but I do occasionally react with, "Dang son, that was !@#$ing stupid!" This is a change for me, as I would react to things (like my ex-girlfriend pushing a button) with repression and then eventual rage. Now it's just an unwillingness to tolerate these things. Either I shut her down by ending the conversation or I answer yes/no/lame/gay/LOL, which prevents her from getting any kind of access to The Buttons. The Buttons themselves are less potent than they used to be, and my external reaction is WAY more subdued.
Lately she played a power game about my visitation with our daughter. She didn't want me to use her trash can. Told her that was fine, and I'll take our daughter out instead of visiting at her house. Problem solved. WOW she didn't like that at all, and now she's trying to get me to return to the old way of visiting at her house.
RE: Sean's AM Journal - Benjamin - 08-29-2012
I more have the problem that I can't sleep for hours when I goto bed, then I sleep for a while and then wake up and can't go back to sleep like your talking about.
Very good on being more assertive, I have been at the frustration stage myself but it is an important part of it. Good job not taking her crap.
-Ben
RE: Sean's AM Journal - Shannon - 08-29-2012
Beautiful results, Sean. Just beautiful.
RE: Sean's AM Journal - Sean - 08-30-2012
Day 35 of AM Stage One (I missed four days, so I am adding 6):
This Journal is going to be an excellent way to notice that changes: Because Shannon made this really smooth, it's not intuitive to remain conscious of the changes and what is happening.
I broke up with my girflriend in June, moving out of the rental house we shared on July 1. It's been pretty bad: fights, bitchy pot shots, power struggles, and other breakup-with-a-kid-involved bovine excrement. My ex recently sent an email to me that was intended for someone else. In it was a description of my personality as being rebelious, regardless of the need to rebel or consider the consequences. In the past, I'd have blown my top, fired back a reply trying to "get" her with a poke of some sort. Right now, I'm just leaving it unanswered.
Many will doubt whether this email was sent mistakenly or not. I lean toward it being so, since it was done with Gmail and their native interface makes this an easy mistake to make. Regardless, in this case, I feel the right move is to ignore it: There is nothing to be gained by responding: she sees me the way she sees me, and nothing I say will change that. "Never wrestle with a pig: you'll both get muddy and the pig likes it."
I've been studying alpha concepts, game, and improving my own attitude for a while. I think this has lent itself incredibly to the results I've been having over the first month of using this program. I'm so eager to get started on Stage Two. I'll be working very hard to ensure that I don't miss any days in the future, because I now know how frustrating it is to be at the calendar end of a stage and stil have "overtime" to do to finish the stage legitimately.
I'm already contemplating what I want to do following AM. BASE, WM, SM, and ASC all come up as potential candidates. I'm starting a company with a buddy to build an app for iPhone and Android, and BASE would be a wise choice. ASC comes up because confidence is something I've lacked throughout my life. WM and SM come up because I would love to be surrounded by beautiful women. I have five months to figure this out, and it may be educational in the future to look back and see what I've considered here.
I'm curious about the 5G effects available in WM 2.0, and seeing them 9.2x faster*, because I love to see how new shiny things work out. I'll be preordering this in the near future, so that places it on even footing with BASE, which I bought during the ridiculous sale earlier this month.
* I'd bet money that Shannon made that number up to keep people from asking how much more effective it is and being at a loss for an answer.
RE: Sean's AM Journal - Shannon - 08-30-2012
Worry about self confidence after you finish AM. It's in there.
As for 9.2x faster... 5G by itself is 9.2 times more data throughput. More data throughput is more exposure. More exposure is more impact. More impact is more power. Nothing is made up. When I don't know something, I say so, because the key to my success in this business boils down to having people TRUST me. So I bet $500 you're wrong. Pay up. ;D
RE: Sean's AM Journal - Sean - 08-30-2012
Hahahaha! Touché, Shannon.
For the record, my footnote was in jest, and I'd not call your ethics into question flippantly. Also, I'll send the $500 by mail. ;-)
RE: Sean's AM Journal - Benjamin - 08-30-2012
It's good that you don't feel the need to reply.
I think it would be entertaining to reply and agree with her but also make it more extreme, kind of like Ryans profile.
Or just be like "thankyou for the wonderful personality test, i'm off to join a nun convent".
Though it's probably better to leave it unanswered. If only I did and said all the things I thought of the world would be a crazy place for me!
-Ben
RE: Sean's AM Journal - Sean - 08-30-2012
Based on this post, I think I can eliminate SM as the next step. I like having the choice be mine whether the beautiful woman in question is going to share my bed or just be someone fun to hang around with.
I should have known self confidence would already be in AM: it's one of the defining characteristics of an alpha male. So from this early planning, I'm down to BASE and WM. It will likely depend on my priorities following AM.
RE: Sean's AM Journal - Shannon - 08-30-2012
(08-30-2012, 05:17 PM)Sean Wrote: Hahahaha! Touché, Shannon.
For the record, my footnote was in jest, and I'd not call your ethics into question flippantly. Also, I'll send the $500 by mail. ;-)
I know. I thought an amusing response was in order, though, just to clarify in case someone else comes across it and wonders.
RE: Sean's AM Journal - Sean - 08-31-2012
(08-30-2012, 09:26 PM)Shannon Wrote:(08-30-2012, 05:17 PM)Sean Wrote: Hahahaha! Touché, Shannon.
For the record, my footnote was in jest, and I'd not call your ethics into question flippantly. Also, I'll send the $500 by mail. ;-)
I know. I thought an amusing response was in order, though, just to clarify in case someone else comes across it and wonders.
We're on the same wavelength. I'm glad to know it!