(05-06-2020, 12:48 AM)Darwin Wrote: Hi Shannon, a couple of things clicked into place for me with two books I came across about fear and the experiences I've had with your subs.

I've spoken often here about MLS and SE - having recently read 'Finding Flow' by Mihaly Csíkszentmihályi I realise that with both of these subs I spent a lot of time in flow, and they helped me get into these states through different means, and that this is what I keep trying to get back to now (when I speak often about these subs).

With SE I entered flow because I had complete self acceptance and no inner critic bugging ; instead I had an attitude of 'whatever happens I can handle it, and my peace and happiness comes first'; with this attitude I could engage in any task, from creating a financial model  to cleaning the kitchen (for want of a better expression) like an artist, labouring with curiosity and for the sheer pleasure of the work I was doing.

MLS built upon this (I transitioned into MLS straight from SE) by giving me tools to enhance my skill level. Not only did I have no inner critic but I had the added confidence of possessing a power to learn to solve and enjoy engaging in any problem.

The self esteem and high level mental competence from MLS gave me an experience I've not experienced since or before; something like being the character from limitless. I felt that with enough time and focus I could do anything and be in love with what I was doing.

The relevance of this to the current discussion on FRM is I had no fear at that time and I believe absence was intrinsically linked to the freedom and the energy state of being in flow which in turn came from the acceptance that I could handle anything with the power of not being ego damaged by failure or criticism (from SE) and the power being able to overcome and even enjoy any obstacle (through MLS).

Now I come to the main point I happened to open up the book 'feel the fear and do it anyway' on a page which seemed to corroborate my experience of no fear and the trail which lead to that state (through the path of Self Esteem and MLS)

The book distinguishes Level 1, 2 and 3 fears; level 1 fears being fears of things which just happen or which you need to take action on such as being attacked (just happens) and losing weight (something you need to take action on). Level 2 fears however are those which challenge your identity/ego such as success, being rejected etc (I  personally place these fears in the realm of the death fear which we have spoken of).  Level 3 is really interesting - the 'I can't handle it' fear; and every fear can be traced to this fear - i.e. i can't handle being rejected, I can't handle being attacked.

What I believe is that if I feel I can handle anything as I very much did on the subs I mentioned, I would have no need for fear (and I didn't). I am able to give up control over what I can't control and enjoy focussing on what I can control, even be absorbed in it (the fearless flow state).

In summary fear in my experience was entirely dissolved by trust, and trust came from a huge sense of personal power and personal power came from competence, discipline and the ability to manage my emotional state.

I hope that's helpful.

(05-06-2020, 02:24 AM)Darwin Wrote: Oh I wanted to add on the relationship between power and fear; There are a few powers which I think are helpful to develop mentioned in the book which I think are strong antidotes to fear.  

(1) The power to create joy and happiness
(2)  The power to do what is needed (have discipline, overcome resistance)
(3) Power over how you react/and your understanding (the power to have choice over you emotional state)
(4) The power to act - I place this as a high level of consciousness about your level of agency in any given moment
(5) The power to Love !

I would break these powers down into several skills which I think have a good shot at raising power in these areas.

Skill 1: The skill of Flow

This means we confidently set goals and are able to immerse ourselves in those goals, be very present and engage with all tasks of life with high levels of presence. Research shows that the flow state is associated with the release of all the major happy chemicals (dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin and endorphin); so this skill covers joy and happiness,  as well as the power to act (and i believe the power to love).

Skill 2: The skill of resistance confrontation

I believe that regardless of how good we feel we need to acquire the skill of getting over hurdles and weathering discomfort, knowing that we can overcome discomfort and have a a high frustration tolerance leaves us confident that we can overcome any obstacle; this can help us to enter into flow,  as well as give us the confidence to act when external circumstance goes against us.

Skill 3: The skill of Consciousness

This is a tricky one, having a strong relationship to reality is necessary but also uncomfortable. We can't pick suitable goals without high levels of consciousness and realism - sure there is a place for fantasising, but when it comes down to the nitty gritty of goal completion as well as interacting with fellow humans and the planet we need to have a real sense of our place and have some humility else we choose goals which ultimately don't serve us (and I believe by definition that means they don't serve others) well, and we end up somewhere on the spectrum unable to comprehend where others are coming from.

OK rant over. Don't know what use if any this was but hey thought it was worth sharing my thoughts.

(05-06-2020, 06:26 AM)EvolvingPhoenix Wrote: Hey @Shannon I know I've been asleep at the wheel on this one, but the extreme focus thing? Awesome!

Great idea for a sub!

(05-06-2020, 09:59 AM)Shannon Wrote:

(05-06-2020, 06:26 AM)EvolvingPhoenix Wrote: Hey @Shannon I know I've been asleep at the wheel on this one, but the extreme focus thing? Awesome!

Great idea for a sub!

Are you saying you just realized we have LFC sub, or that you just used it and like it?

(05-06-2020, 09:50 AM)Shannon Wrote:

(05-06-2020, 12:31 AM)Zubrowka Wrote: Shannon, could you give example of a time when you had use of the leadership training from AM and how it helped you?

A lot of what I would talk about has to do with having it transition me from refusing to allow myself to be led by my girlfriend, and leading her instead.  At that time, I was dating a model, not the hottest woman I ever dated, but she looked like Gabriel Union.  This woman was strong willed and used to getting her way through sex, manipulation, lies and whatever else it took to achieve, but she was also really good at self deception, so I couldn't tell when she was lying for the first year of our relationship because she genuinely believed her own lies.

When the dam broke, I was in a bad place emotionally.  I had a situation I could not accept (cheating, being lied to, etc.) forcing me to deal with a fear I could not face (being alone).  I remember one day before she came home from work realizing in no uncertain terms that I had to give her an ultimatum: stop cheating and get serious, or get out of my life.  That scared the hell out of me, and while I was taking a shower I remember I broke down crying out of fear of her walking out.  The only reason I had the courage to actually stand up with no tears and genuinely deliver that ultimatum without flinching was Alpha Male.  

She walked in that door and I hit her with it like a lead brick, drill sergeant style.  No fear, no hesitation, nothing but my way or the highway.  Looking back, had I been further along in my development, I would simply have told her that she blew it, and get out.  But for me to go from so terrified of being alone that I would let a woman do anything she wanted to me and behind my back, to giving an ultimatum without hesitation was a huge change for me.

She bent to my will.  Unfortunately, she was the type who loved a strong man, but would never stop trying to test, push boundaries and get away with shit, and it wasn't long before she was back at it.  Lying, cheating, stealing, drugs, etc.  That second move was even harder, but I did kick her out.  

You might be asking yourself, "How does this apply to leadership?"  Well I was, for the first time in my life, leading myself through and past my biggest fears, and that took a lot of leadership.

Later on, we tried to get back together (because I was being willfully delusional) but she kept doing it, and even after she stopped, the fallout was just too much.  And I ended it for good, another very difficult thing to do, because some part of me was willing to do and accept and believe anything to keep her.  I think part of that was that she had some sort of way of manipulating my emotions and sex drive that I didn't understand for a long time.

So the AM leadership training got me this beautiful girlfriend who loved sex like she loved to breathe, and got me out of that relationship with her when I would not have had the strength or will to otherwise.  Without AM, I firmly believe that I would have ended up either dead or in prison as a result of that relationship.  As it turned out, I was fine, and she ended up in prison.  (And for something incredibly stupid, too, which you would never guess in a million years unless you knew she was an active alcoholic at the time.  Which, somehow, I hadn't figured out.)

(05-06-2020, 09:30 AM)Shannon Wrote:

(05-05-2020, 06:53 PM)KingDavid93 Wrote: @Shannon

Hi,

Out of curiosity what are you currently using yourself?

Right now I am using Life Tune-Up 5.  Need to keep from getting depressed with all the time being stuck indoors because of the lockdown, leaving me few to no options for anything to do outside the house.

Quote:And with regards to MIR 3.0- if you are using it to target any latent infections or other infections that you carry but don’t have any blatant symptoms how long should you be using it for that effect and how do you know when to stop/when any latent infections have been taken care of?

Doesn't it detail that in the instructions for that program?

(05-07-2020, 06:02 AM)KingDavid93 Wrote: 1. That’s interesting considering you mentioned that MIR was having some serious effects on you

Quote:2. What I meant to ask is if you have latent infection or any other type without any actual symptoms how do you know when to stop without getting tested for it, since you probably wouldn’t know what to get tested for- therefore using mir as your test, is it as simple as monitoring your energy levels and then when you feel that it isn’t using too much energy anymore then you’re good to go?

(05-07-2020, 01:06 PM)LiquidMind Wrote: Good to see frm is progressing for you Shannon
I'll never quite know what these models do exactly or what they show but it sounds like frm 4.9 is gonna be good

(05-07-2020, 01:09 PM)ncbeareatingman Wrote: Shannon's quote
"FRM 4.9 is definitely interesting... getting some results I didn't expect coming through the models. "  

Me: No shit? Like what?   lemme guess Super secret KFC special ingredients? Oh well...least it was worth askin'
Im shure its good stuff,whatever it may be!