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+--- Thread: mat422 alpha journal (/Thread-mat422-alpha-journal)
RE: mat422 alpha journal - mat422 - 04-13-2011
So stage 4 has been affecting my dreams lately. Particularly the one last night where I made out with my best friend's girl lol. Things might feel a little awkward for me the next time I see her. But for the most part my dreams have been tame, the ones I remember anyway. I always forget what the beginning of a stage usually makes me feel like so when I make the change I encounter a little hiccup and feel like I don't transition that smooth.
So I have about 3 weeks left of classes until summer. This is usually my biggest problem with regards to doing my work. So close yet so far away lol, I just feel like a lot of motivation has gone out the window. But only for the classes I really have no interest in, which I guess shouldn't surprise me.
RE: mat422 alpha journal - Shannon - 04-13-2011
(04-10-2011, 03:20 PM)Ryan Wrote: I'm going through the same exact BS, at the moment. I feel so unfilled no matter how many women I get.
That would be because you seek the answer in quantity when the answer is not quantity. The answer is the experience of quantity not being what you wanted, and finally a turn to something else. Usually, quality.
RE: mat422 alpha journal - Patti - 04-13-2011
(04-13-2011, 12:21 PM)Shannon Wrote:(04-10-2011, 03:20 PM)Ryan Wrote: I'm going through the same exact BS, at the moment. I feel so unfilled no matter how many women I get.
That would be because you seek the answer in quantity when the answer is not quantity. The answer is the experience of quantity not being what you wanted, and finally a turn to something else. Usually, quality.
^^^^^
He's one wise cookie!
RE: mat422 alpha journal - mat422 - 04-13-2011
So this is gonna be a quick little insight on something I thought of over the past few days. As I progress in the alpha male set I become more and more in tune with my own intuition. I think one of my most self defeating behaviors is not trusting myself enough. Following my gut instinct is something that I'm working on and allowing that to guide me through life. My current path I'm taking, I should say exploring, is still questionable as to whether or not I will find a passion in it. Only time will tell.
I have this fire inside of me to do something, but I've yet to find something to channel that passion into. It's frustrating because if I had something that I could dedicate all my time and energy to, I would go at it 110%. I'm a horrible multi tasker, so when it comes to college I hate how I have to take all these different classes that don't tie together. In a way, yes I am lazy, but only because I have yet to find a passion powerful enough to keep my attention.
I don't see money as a goal, I never have. I know I need money, but my focus is on my life purpose. I feel if you are directly connected to your life purpose you are aligned with the universe and things will be provided to you as needed. It's like tuning into a radio frequency, at first there is static, then a garbled signal, until finally it clicks and the audio comes in clearly. It's just a matter of fine tuning your path in life and following your gut instinct in order to guide you into the best place.
RE: mat422 alpha journal - mat422 - 04-15-2011
So something I'm noticing in stage 4 is my appreciation for female beauty without actually any neediness attached to it, which is nice. Not like in the past where I saw a beautiful girl and then the only thing on my mind was how I could get her. I guess it's more of an abundance mentality. You see a good looking woman and then realize she's not the only one lol. I don't know I guess in the past I thought admiring the beauty of a girl was "giving your power away". Yeah, the pick up industry made me paranoid of stuff to an irrational degree. I've noticed now that I'm actually accepting the feelings instead of pushing them away, girls seem to be a lot more interested and I catch a lot of looks my way. It's definitely that whole eye seduction thing, it seems like I communicate 1000 times more just by looking into her eyes than actually saying something and I know she feels it too.
RE: mat422 alpha journal - mat422 - 04-19-2011
So stage 4 is making me feel more confident. But the best I can describe how I'm feeling is heavy, like there is a huge weight on my shoulders. I've been really tired the past few days and feel very restless during the night. The dreams I've been having are all about taking control and being a leader when things get out of hand. Overall I feel very upside down, much like stage 2, but without the intense moodiness and irritability. I'll see how it goes from here. Usually it takes a week or two before the sub starts hitting me hard, but that's how I know it's working.
RE: mat422 alpha journal - mat422 - 04-22-2011
I had the strangest dream earlier today. I got home from my class at college and was exhausted so I decided to rest my eyes for a bit. Well that pretty much turned into sleep for a good 2 or three hours. The dream I had was so twisted and surreal, also had me welcoming darkness or evil into my life.
Anyway I'm a little fuzzy on the details but it was one of those dreams, more like a nightmare where everything looks normal and really close to reality except weird stuff happens. All I remember was an evil presence around me and my willingness to show no fear and accept it. At one point in the dream the evil presence pretty much merged with my body and I had excruciating stomach pains like it was tearing up my insides. Still I didn't cower and I took the pain and integrated with it.
Normally a dream like that would have me scared and waking up with a pounding heart, but that wasn't the case. It was a deep knowing that nothing could hurt me and fear was pointless.
RE: mat422 alpha journal - Jeff - 04-22-2011
(04-22-2011, 07:30 PM)mat422 Wrote: I had the strangest dream earlier today. I got home from my class at college and was exhausted so I decided to rest my eyes for a bit. Well that pretty much turned into sleep for a good 2 or three hours. The dream I had was so twisted and surreal, also had me welcoming darkness or evil into my life.
Anyway I'm a little fuzzy on the details but it was one of those dreams, more like a nightmare where everything looks normal and really close to reality except weird stuff happens. All I remember was an evil presence around me and my willingness to show no fear and accept it. At one point in the dream the evil presence pretty much merged with my body and I had excruciating stomach pains like it was tearing up my insides. Still I didn't cower and I took the pain and integrated with it.
Normally a dream like that would have me scared and waking up with a pounding heart, but that wasn't the case. It was a deep knowing that nothing could hurt me and fear was pointless.
Hmmm, I had a somewhat similar dream. I was somewhere in the Midwest, around people I've never met before. Very rural, and farmer type of folks. It was almost a Wizard of Oz Doomsday. Tornados were popping up left and right. I emerge from a cellar with people attempting to pull me back in. I brush their grips off like fixing a minor wrinkle in my shirt. I am standing in awe of the beauty, yet havoc these +100 tornados are causing. One spawns directly infront of me. I wake up. "Cool," I murmered getting up to go take my dog on a walk.
I think these subs are instilling fearlessness through dreams, the safest way and less time consuming. The pains are odd. Did you workout or do something else that caused it?
RE: mat422 alpha journal - mat422 - 04-23-2011
(04-22-2011, 08:41 PM)Jeff Wrote:(04-22-2011, 07:30 PM)mat422 Wrote: I had the strangest dream earlier today. I got home from my class at college and was exhausted so I decided to rest my eyes for a bit. Well that pretty much turned into sleep for a good 2 or three hours. The dream I had was so twisted and surreal, also had me welcoming darkness or evil into my life.
Anyway I'm a little fuzzy on the details but it was one of those dreams, more like a nightmare where everything looks normal and really close to reality except weird stuff happens. All I remember was an evil presence around me and my willingness to show no fear and accept it. At one point in the dream the evil presence pretty much merged with my body and I had excruciating stomach pains like it was tearing up my insides. Still I didn't cower and I took the pain and integrated with it.
Normally a dream like that would have me scared and waking up with a pounding heart, but that wasn't the case. It was a deep knowing that nothing could hurt me and fear was pointless.
Hmmm, I had a somewhat similar dream. I was somewhere in the Midwest, around people I've never met before. Very rural, and farmer type of folks. It was almost a Wizard of Oz Doomsday. Tornados were popping up left and right. I emerge from a cellar with people attempting to pull me back in. I brush their grips off like fixing a minor wrinkle in my shirt. I am standing in awe of the beauty, yet havoc these +100 tornados are causing. One spawns directly infront of me. I wake up. "Cool," I murmered getting up to go take my dog on a walk.
I think these subs are instilling fearlessness through dreams, the safest way and less time consuming. The pains are odd. Did you workout or do something else that caused it?
Yeah the dreams are all about fearlessness lately, which never happened to me before. In fact I'd say I was plagued by a lot of nightmares but it's like that saying "the only thing we have to fear is fear itself". I can see how a lot of the stuff in my life wasn't scary, it's just me making it scary.
The pain was a bit odd, but at the same time I'm used to it. I can't say it was from working out, it's just my twisted imagination haha. I've experienced a variety of pain in dreams. I've been stabbed, shot, fallen off buildings, punched in the face, flesh ripped off(zombies haha), and way way back in my childhood eaten by trees. Yes trees lol. If you have ever played Mortal Kombat II that stage with the trees that have faces is pretty much what I dreamed of haha.
So pain is quite real to me during my dreams and always has been. Is this the same for you or is there no pain in your dreams? Dreams are sometimes the craziest things for me because they feel so close to reality.
RE: mat422 alpha journal - Ryan - 04-23-2011
(04-15-2011, 11:04 AM)mat422 Wrote: So something I'm noticing in stage 4 is my appreciation for female beauty without actually any neediness attached to it, which is nice. Not like in the past where I saw a beautiful girl and then the only thing on my mind was how I could get her. I guess it's more of an abundance mentality. You see a good looking woman and then realize she's not the only one lol. I don't know I guess in the past I thought admiring the beauty of a girl was "giving your power away". Yeah, the pick up industry made me paranoid of stuff to an irrational degree. I've noticed now that I'm actually accepting the feelings instead of pushing them away, girls seem to be a lot more interested and I catch a lot of looks my way. It's definitely that whole eye seduction thing, it seems like I communicate 1000 times more just by looking into her eyes than actually saying something and I know she feels it too.
Wow I've pretty much been going through the same changes... I noticed I admire the beauty in women more and inside when I see them, it's as if they are a whole different creature, wanting love, protection, fun... Just overall, I guess I'm seeing them more as playful little girls/kids instead of intimidating women. I also got that feeling of stage 2 creeping back in during stage 4. Another thing I've been noticing is of course the increase in eye seduction.
RE: mat422 alpha journal - mat422 - 04-25-2011
Ok time for a little self reflection. So before I began my alpha journey I felt quite powerless, like I was less of a person, I lived life in fear. Everyday for me was difficult, I felt trapped. No matter what I did, self help, affirmations, meditation, it never made a lasting impact. But I did grow as a person and through those rough times I've gained insight that I wouldn't give up for the world. When you are in the darkest area of your life you learn things that people overlook and you come back from the experience with wisdom.
I've often wondered where I would be right now without the alpha set. How my life would have progressed, what I would have done, what other useless stuff I would spend my money on to fix me. It's surreal, I look at myself today and I feel like I've jumped into a parallel universe where I'm still me, but at the same time I'm a completely different person. It's that internal knowing that things have changed and you just have these behaviors on autopilot, it is you. It's still a little strange, I don't think I've grown into it all the way yet. Everything operates so smoothly but it doesn't feel right because my life has never felt like that.
But too often I don't give enough credit to myself. I've grown as a person and achieved a state of mind that I feel would have taken at least 10 years of experience or more to cultivate. It's an amazing thing and I went through hell to get here at times.
I think some people craft their beliefs from their experiences in life. Those fortunate to grow up with positive experiences develop positive beliefs. Those that grow up with negative experiences get the negative beliefs. Change through conscious effort is probably the longest most difficult way. But it all leads back to beliefs, you change your beliefs and your reality changes.
Subliminals are like shortcuts in a way. You always hear people say there are no shortcuts in life. Well it's true to some extent, but sometimes there are shortcuts. A guy can spend his whole life trying to get the mindset of an alpha male and still never achieve it. Subliminals can get him there in less than a year. That's not to say it's not hard work, subliminals really test your mental toughness. But it's all about working smart and utilizing what you can to advance your growth as a person. Those that cling to old ways and advocate willpower as a method of change need to wake up and understand how we have the technology now to reprogram our brains like a computer.
I'm still only on stage 4 so I look forward to my continual growth.
RE: mat422 alpha journal - Spiral - 04-25-2011
I can say that I was in a similar place as you were. I had almost lost it on the last girl that rejected me... And then I watched the secret again with a new outlook on it with more optimism because It was my last hope. And somehow I found affirmations which helped really get things started. I think it's just amazing how the universe could feel my pain and that I wanted change so badly finally that I understood what steps I needed to take to get there. I'm glad to hear your doing well, mat.
I can say that I'm almost through the alpha set and I've changed for the better.. there are still the ups and down days of course but all we can do is learn from them. I like reading your posts, mat.
RE: mat422 alpha journal - mat422 - 04-25-2011
(04-25-2011, 03:15 PM)spiralout1988 Wrote: I can say that I was in a similar place as you were. I had almost lost it on the last girl that rejected me... And then I watched the secret again with a new outlook on it with more optimism because It was my last hope. And somehow I found affirmations which helped really get things started. I think it's just amazing how the universe could feel my pain and that I wanted change so badly finally that I understood what steps I needed to take to get there. I'm glad to hear your doing well, mat.
I can say that I'm almost through the alpha set and I've changed for the better.. there are still the ups and down days of course but all we can do is learn from them. I like reading your posts, mat.
Thanks, I've always been introspective so writing has always been an interesting way to express myself. I'm glad my posts bring value to your life. Yeah I think ups and downs are unavoidable. It's human nature to want to be happy 24/7 but I just don't think that's possible. Once I accepted the downs, I learned to appreciate the ups that much more. Glad to hear you are doing well too.
RE: mat422 alpha journal - Shannon - 04-26-2011
All things happen in cycles. Without the down, up us meaningless; without the darkness, light is meaningless; without sorrow, joy is meaningless...