05-09-2017, 11:31 AM
My advice is don't take advice of virgins... in any field.
ENTP-A
Subliminal Talk
by Indigo Mind Labs
05-09-2017, 12:07 PM
(05-09-2017, 05:49 AM)swisston Wrote: Just read RTBoss's journal about the capacity to have feelings for more than one person etc. I 100% an going through the same thing. The problem is not me, it's my gf. She's still firmly locked into the one person and anything else is cheating mentality. The solution is... Make up your mind, and pursue it. Choose her, and you have to stop using DMSI and stagnate for the rest of your life unless you can get her to change... and you can't change anyone but yourself. Choose DMSI and you're going to have to make another choice sooner or later: Break up with her before you have sex with someone else... "cheat" on her... or you can simply change the rules of the relationship and then let the chips fall where they may. In almost 100% of cases, you will have the woman walk away if you change the rules after they have been set, and especially in a long term committed relationship that is established. So it really boils down to... Quit DMSI and stay where you are... or leave her and find someone new through DMSI. Pick one. And the quicker, the better.
Subliminal Audio Specialist & Administrator
The scientist has a question to find an answer for. The pseudo-scientist has an answer to find a question for. ~ "Failure is the path of least persistence." - Chinese Fortune Cookie ~ Logic left. Emotion right. But thinking, straight ahead. ~ Sperate supra omnia in valorem. (The value of trust is above all else.) ~ Meowsomeness!
05-09-2017, 12:14 PM
My question is why aren't you just telling her that you're ok with more than one partner if that's where you're at?
05-09-2017, 12:47 PM
(05-09-2017, 12:27 PM)Blink Wrote:(05-09-2017, 11:31 AM)blackwing Z Wrote: My advice is don't take advice of virgins... in any field. Yeah was gonna say, dick move.
Your task is not to seek for Love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.
05-09-2017, 12:56 PM
(05-09-2017, 12:47 PM)Darwin Wrote:(05-09-2017, 12:27 PM)Blink Wrote:(05-09-2017, 11:31 AM)blackwing Z Wrote: My advice is don't take advice of virgins... in any field. LOL... So I mentioned that it's good to see progress from a woman with the program. And I mentioned what others have, that he will have to decide whether or not he wants this relationship, or if he wants to go after other women he's seemingly more attracted to. And that it's okay to feel want for them, when he has felt guilt for doing so in the past, and to not feel obligated to stay with someone who doesn't ultimately make him happy, that his own happiness needs to be at the forefront, as he's commented on before... And somehow ***I'm*** denigrated with a stupid troll comment, trying to start some 10 page derail fight. I'm not biting. This forum is going to shit, honestly. This is why I don't bother posting very often now.
05-09-2017, 01:04 PM
I just don't get how can u try and give this guy advice? That's malicious and dishonest af
ENTP-A
05-09-2017, 01:13 PM
(05-09-2017, 01:04 PM)blackwing Z Wrote: I just don't get how can u try and give this guy advice? That's malicious and dishonest af No it wasn't. The post was just an observation on how the program was functioning from Catman's perspective and presenting swisston with options, not advising him to do anything. Now if you wanted to go after Sarge for that, that would be more understandable. All of these guys are grown men though, I'm sure they're able to think for themselves though.
05-09-2017, 01:40 PM
(05-09-2017, 12:56 PM)CatMan Wrote:(05-09-2017, 12:47 PM)Darwin Wrote:(05-09-2017, 12:27 PM)Blink Wrote:(05-09-2017, 11:31 AM)blackwing Z Wrote: My advice is don't take advice of virgins... in any field. Come on, now. I know you have some mental and emotional fortitude, bro. Dust off, ignore the negativity, and keep it classy - like me! (LOL!)
05-09-2017, 04:40 PM
(05-09-2017, 04:17 PM)Benjamin Wrote:(05-09-2017, 12:27 PM)Blink Wrote:(05-09-2017, 11:31 AM)blackwing Z Wrote: My advice is don't take advice of virgins... in any field. Never said it's wrong. It's unnecessary. No need to rub salt into the wound.
INFJ
05-09-2017, 10:18 PM
(This post was last modified: 11-16-2018, 08:31 AM by Dr. Strangelove.)
05-10-2017, 12:10 AM
So... back on track.... I'm not in a rush to get rid of my relationship. For the most part it's really good. I know that I have a moan on here, but that's just me venting a bit. There are many good bits too, especially the companionship/partnership that many people never get to truly experience.
I still have a strong fear of the unknown without her. I have no idea who I am as a single person. A large part of me thinks that I would be an idiot to throw it away. I am NOT unhappy... I just think that things could be better maybe. It's a tricky position. It would be a lot easier if I was actually unhappy, or we were arguing, or she was unreasonable. Right now there's no stimulus to force me to take action either way. I'm still waiting to see any external effects from DMSI, and until something changes there, or until I have changed so much internally that the choices become more obvious/natural I am going to sit right where I am. We have a works night out on Saturday. The receptionist will be there. I'll see if there's any move towards flirtation. I'll be back on to B on the Friday night.
Fear Is The Mind-killer
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