After taking a few days of not listening to anything & really considering what my goals are & some comments on other AM6 journals I have decided that I am running AM6 starting today 5/20/18. I may listen to E2 after I run AM6 twice but right now I'm not thinking about that. I'm going to let AM6 be my initiation from being a boy into a man. Seems weird to say that as I will be 50 years old in less than two months but seeing as its something I've strived in one way or another to do for several years & as I realized more & more how my insecurities & resulting immaturity is & was holding me back , I said " fuck it" & until AM7 is released AM6 is what I will be running.
Like @
DavisMind91 is doing I'm going to have a book I will be reading with each stage. For stage one it's The Sigma Male by Dr John T Alexander.
I've been curious that one of the books Shannon recommends reading is by John Alexander. Same person?
Update - Slight change of plans. Tuesday 5/22/18 will be day 1. Should be interesting & necessary as I also start my 2nd job tomorrow evening. That's part of the reason I chose to run AM6 now. Because of my responsibilities & desire to drastically reduce the learning curve to become as good as possible at my main job so the 2nd job is as temporary as possible.
AM6 Stage 1 Day 1 - Not a whole lot to report. Was quite a bit anxious last night regarding a couple of mistakes I made at my main job yesterday because I was really tired from lack of sleep stressing out about the 2nd job & how I feel it will cause issues like what happened at work yesterday. For that reason I have decided not to do the 2nd job. I'm not running AM6 to attract women. I'm running it to become the best version of me that I can be. Along with that be as mature mentally & emotionally as possible. That & I'm done making bad or poor decisions based on fears & insecurities. I have such a huge opportunity at my job/career & yet I feel so often that I get in my own way of getting better faster because of those fears & insecurities I mentioned . Its weird to think that I'm almost 50 years old & I let things people say & do bother me. That's another reason why I chose to run AM6. To develop a thicker skin & not be so sensitive.
AM6 Stage 1 Day 2 - Given what I posted yesterday & what my goals are I now know running AM6 is the best choice. I was telling my wife last night how the thought of taking the second job didn't feel right. That I have to be the best I can for her & myself. That going back to doing something I did for a bit four years ago & the opportunity in place now just felt wrong. That said that because of the opportunity I mentioned that having my head on straight & not letting stupid shit impact me mentally & emotionally the longer I run AM6 the more focused I can & will be. More later
AM6 Stage 1 Day 3 - looks like the second job is a go after all. It's only Saturday & Sunday & will help ease the financial burden while I work on getting better at my main job. This is where the increase in wisdom & maturity I will gain from running AM6 will serve me well. Also this part
"Doing what needs to be done, because it needs to be done, and that is the way of the Alpha"
I've made excuses in the past for why I didn't sacrifice my time or energy when it shouldn't have been an issue. For a long time I've had this really silly case of FOMO
(fear of missing out) & now I know how ridiculously immature that is. Its excuse making behaviour & not something an emotionally healthy man would do.
AM6 Stage 1 Day 7 - Went back & read my last few posts. Nice reminder of why I chose to run AM6 . It's so obvious I have quite a bit of maturity to do both mentally & emotionally. Getting between eight & ten hours of listening time in a day. I haven't noticed much in the way of changes outside of an increase in self awareness. Part of why I'm not posting every day. I would rather look back see how far I've come. I am trying not to be attached to any outcome . Just let the sub do what it's meant to do
AM6 Stage 1 Day 7 update - One form of resistance I deal with constantly is fighting myself to take the time run this sub or any other as instructed. Especially one that has anything to do with healing or clearing. On an intellectual level I understand the purpose but I struggle with it so much emotionally. It's so silly because I know how dealing with the trauma & abuse I went through growing up has & continues to impact my adult life. It's that part of me that wonders why I'm not running E2 instead. I'm not going to stop AM6 but I know why I have not run E2. Its because I have yet to let go of my ego. That need to be right or in control is most likely playing a huge part in why I am not progressing at my new job as fast as I would like to. It's all my ego getting in the way.
AM6 Stage 1 Day 8- feeling incredibly anxious today & I'm not sure why. Short work week . Kept wondering last night when the confidence & IDGAF aspects of AM6 start kicking in?
(05-29-2018, 06:55 AM)JCasterlin Wrote: [ -> ]AM6 Stage 1 Day 8- feeling incredibly anxious today & I'm not sure why. Short work week . Kept wondering last night when the confidence & IDGAF aspects of AM6 start kicking in?
The moment u stop giving a fuck about it.
It can depend on the person and their specific issues. I was trying to find the thread that gives a description of the stages. I couldn't but I saved it in a text file.
Quote:That's not very easy to answer for two reasons. First, each year I try to make as many improvements as possible, and second, the script is so huge and complex. That' why there are six stages.
Most people respond to Stage 1 with a fairly polar response. Either they don't notice anything, or they notice they are really growing in self confidence and a few even start reporting impatience with the people around them playing mind games and trying to manipulate them. Stage 1 is clearing out the negative self image BS and laying a solid foundation for the rest of the program. Stage 1 specifically prepares you for Stage 2.
Stage 2 is not as polar usually, but some people still don't see enough to notice a difference. Most people begin noticing this stage and this is where most people start showing the self confidence, desire to stand up and do one's own thing, and the irritation with the BS of others really starts manifesting here. Stage 2 is designed to get you up to speed and ready for Stage 3.
Stage 3 is aimed at bringing out the Big Guns. This is where you'll be ready to get serious about becoming an alpha, but it also aims to balance and temper the previous stages. Thus while there may be irritation with the BS of others, your response will tend to be more refined and less crude. Big Guns means this is where the core of the Alpha/Dominant programming really takes focus. Stage 3 is where most of the most important and obvious work is going on because it is here you are learning to accept an internalize the Alpha core you couldn't have handled dealing with previous to using Stages 1 and 2. It also prepares you for Stage 4.
Stage 4 is a combination of extension of Stage 3's teachings and concepts, and a refresher for Stages 1 and 2. It also refines the Alpha/Dominant social response and makes you more self sufficient and less likely to feel the need to prove anything to anyone. Self reliance. It also prepares for Stage 5.
Stage 5 is a further extension of some of the concepts introduced in Stage 3 and Stage 4, and further polishes the attitude, aiming for a sort of cool "James Bond" effect. The primary goal of this stage is to polish and refine what all the previous stages have been introducing and building.
Stage 6 is a "finalizer". It is like the varnish coat. The "final polish and sealant", designed to put a high gloss on everything that has been built so far and make it as long term and permanent as possible. It also acts as a stabilizer, balancer and refresher for Stages 1 through 5.
(05-29-2018, 04:49 PM)Benjamin Wrote: [ -> ]It can depend on the person and their specific issues. I was trying to find the thread that gives a description of the stages. I couldn't but I saved it in a text file.
Quote:That's not very easy to answer for two reasons. First, each year I try to make as many improvements as possible, and second, the script is so huge and complex. That' why there are six stages.
Most people respond to Stage 1 with a fairly polar response. Either they don't notice anything, or they notice they are really growing in self confidence and a few even start reporting impatience with the people around them playing mind games and trying to manipulate them. Stage 1 is clearing out the negative self image BS and laying a solid foundation for the rest of the program. Stage 1 specifically prepares you for Stage 2.
Stage 2 is not as polar usually, but some people still don't see enough to notice a difference. Most people begin noticing this stage and this is where most people start showing the self confidence, desire to stand up and do one's own thing, and the irritation with the BS of others really starts manifesting here. Stage 2 is designed to get you up to speed and ready for Stage 3.
Stage 3 is aimed at bringing out the Big Guns. This is where you'll be ready to get serious about becoming an alpha, but it also aims to balance and temper the previous stages. Thus while there may be irritation with the BS of others, your response will tend to be more refined and less crude. Big Guns means this is where the core of the Alpha/Dominant programming really takes focus. Stage 3 is where most of the most important and obvious work is going on because it is here you are learning to accept an internalize the Alpha core you couldn't have handled dealing with previous to using Stages 1 and 2. It also prepares you for Stage 4.
Stage 4 is a combination of extension of Stage 3's teachings and concepts, and a refresher for Stages 1 and 2. It also refines the Alpha/Dominant social response and makes you more self sufficient and less likely to feel the need to prove anything to anyone. Self reliance. It also prepares for Stage 5.
Stage 5 is a further extension of some of the concepts introduced in Stage 3 and Stage 4, and further polishes the attitude, aiming for a sort of cool "James Bond" effect. The primary goal of this stage is to polish and refine what all the previous stages have been introducing and building.
Stage 6 is a "finalizer". It is like the varnish coat. The "final polish and sealant", designed to put a high gloss on everything that has been built so far and make it as long term and permanent as possible. It also acts as a stabilizer, balancer and refresher for Stages 1 through 5.
Thanks Ben. I've read that a few times.I'm fighting the impatient & immature parts of myself that desperately wants to hang on even if it's those parts of me that are or have made me sabotage myself no matter how hard I tried consciously not to. I know I'm still early into AM6 but its becoming increasingly apparent that unless something drastic changes over the next six plus months, that I'm going to run AM6 at least three times total. That's not a complaint. It's the awareness that given my current situation & where I want to be, there's a lot of work that needs to be done. I am honestly ok with that because I would love to run AM7 a couple of times after three runs of AM6. Providing it's been released at that point. If not I may run AM6 a fourth time
(05-29-2018, 07:11 AM)Zane Wrote: [ -> ] (05-29-2018, 06:55 AM)JCasterlin Wrote: [ -> ]AM6 Stage 1 Day 8- feeling incredibly anxious today & I'm not sure why. Short work week . Kept wondering last night when the confidence & IDGAF aspects of AM6 start kicking in?
The moment u stop giving a **** about it.
You're probably correct
AM6 Stage 1 Day 9 - Feel quite a bit different than I did yesterday. Almost zero anxiety. Not concerned with drama at work or what other people are doing. The change could easily be related to the way I was listening while I slept. I set it up so one of the masked versions would be playing. Not realizing that the default player on my phone was playing the ultrasonic version. So I accidently had two versions playing at the same time for eight hours. Probably closer to nine. The other two things I noticed is that I'm more relaxed & I feel zero need to seek any validation from anyone
Good results so far, keep going my man.