03-30-2018, 02:13 PM
03-30-2018, 02:22 PM
(....)
03-30-2018, 02:36 PM
Thanks man.
03-30-2018, 04:33 PM
Quote:A large part of my anxiety appears to come from the nightclub job as I look at every single person in the street as if they are going to hurt me, I can't walk past a single person without visualising how i'm going to be able to counter if they attack me.
Damn.. I understand this well. Do you do security?
I believe that contributed to some of my issues too. When I was doing it regularly, all the fights that I got into, i'd walk down the street hyperaware and paranoid. And i'd see people I threw out and combined with some things that happened I started to isolate myself.
I feel way more relaxed out of that job now.
Hope you can start to deal with it.
03-30-2018, 05:27 PM
Yeah it was the same job, I quit it 3.5 years ago but that's when I think it started, my brain finally had time to process everything as it was a second job alongside my full time work, I was so busy I never had time to process it fully I think. I was very good at turning off feelings while doing that job.
That sounds exactly like me, especially the isolation part, I never even realised it until a few months ago.
Thanks. How did you start to get over it? Or did it just stop when you left that job?
That sounds exactly like me, especially the isolation part, I never even realised it until a few months ago.
Thanks. How did you start to get over it? Or did it just stop when you left that job?
04-02-2018, 04:24 AM
Day 39 2/4/2018
I switched to A side at Day 36 (30/3/2018). I've been inside my house all weekend except for a couple of hours yesterday having dinner with parents and brother and his family.
I've just had a sudden urge this morning to completely clean my house for whatever reason and tidy everything up. I have decided to put my online dating stuff on hold for now definitely as I can see I need to work on some internal issues.
My thoughts during this depressive/down state seem to be becoming more rational and I perhaps can see what my future direction is going to be. I can now visualise how I want to be and how i'm going to be and it involves me doing what I want and not caring what others think.
A path I am looking at is stopping this sub for a couple of weeks and starting AM6. I really think it's what I need to start to take control of my life again, I think it will help me better than DMSI will for it's own goal on my current state and I mean that in the sense that I may get more benefit from the AM6 effects coinciding with DMSI goals. I think.
I'm generally a physically attractive person and i've never really had trouble catching girl's eyes but again I think true male confidence can help me more right now. I just keep remembering a time before I picked up my most recent ex that I was a lot more alpha-like confident in everything I did. I just feel like i've softened up over the last few years and the best way I can put it is I am quite tolerable of everything and anyone, laid back because I care too much about other peoples feelings, people I have never and will never even meet. And I don't believe that's an attractive trait for a male.
I may be wrong. I may not be. I don't want to be seen as just dropping a sub because I don't perceive it to be doing it's job. I'm going to continue listening and continue deciding if it's the best course for me to switch to AM for now. I would appreciate any advice on the matter.
I switched to A side at Day 36 (30/3/2018). I've been inside my house all weekend except for a couple of hours yesterday having dinner with parents and brother and his family.
I've just had a sudden urge this morning to completely clean my house for whatever reason and tidy everything up. I have decided to put my online dating stuff on hold for now definitely as I can see I need to work on some internal issues.
My thoughts during this depressive/down state seem to be becoming more rational and I perhaps can see what my future direction is going to be. I can now visualise how I want to be and how i'm going to be and it involves me doing what I want and not caring what others think.
A path I am looking at is stopping this sub for a couple of weeks and starting AM6. I really think it's what I need to start to take control of my life again, I think it will help me better than DMSI will for it's own goal on my current state and I mean that in the sense that I may get more benefit from the AM6 effects coinciding with DMSI goals. I think.
I'm generally a physically attractive person and i've never really had trouble catching girl's eyes but again I think true male confidence can help me more right now. I just keep remembering a time before I picked up my most recent ex that I was a lot more alpha-like confident in everything I did. I just feel like i've softened up over the last few years and the best way I can put it is I am quite tolerable of everything and anyone, laid back because I care too much about other peoples feelings, people I have never and will never even meet. And I don't believe that's an attractive trait for a male.
I may be wrong. I may not be. I don't want to be seen as just dropping a sub because I don't perceive it to be doing it's job. I'm going to continue listening and continue deciding if it's the best course for me to switch to AM for now. I would appreciate any advice on the matter.