Subliminal Talk

I just decided to post my offline journal after hesitating a lot and being lazy about doing it.

This is the first post, I will update the pdf files of each month in this first post.

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1...sp=sharing

Day 1
10/27/2017


Technical Details:
So first day, I used only 4 hour the first 4 days to clean a bit MLS, so that way the first Stage is less interfered by MLS still running in my brain, if it was actually running. After those 4 days I will use the first stage at 8 hours per day for 32 days, so it will be 36 days for the first stage.
Then the 5 other stage will be at 34 days per stage instead of 32 to be sure the stage is fully integrated.
I did all that because the 10/27/2017 was a special day which rarely happens (once in a year or so) and I think I will get better result that way (it's some esoteric thing)


Can skip:
The morning when I was half awake I had some thoughts about becoming fully myself, being genuinely on my path as a man. It made me think about AM6. On the other hand there is some kind of lightness in my thoughts, some light happiness or confidence or relaxation.
The night I first listened before being fully asleep I felt the subliminal influence a lot more than with 5.5G, it was obvious like I was bothered, a bit like what I remember feeling when I was using AM5.


So I can confirm now, I spent a little time with my family, and I realised I was more open, more socially confident. It is so subtle that I wouldn't have noticed if I wasn't paying attention to it.
One of the reason I want to run WM2 is because I'm sometimes too serious, and it takes me some social lubrication to get me in a good vibe. But when I'm in a good vibe I'm very good at being social and I talk easily with anyone. It's like there is 2 side in me, one who is super serious, grumpy, loner and one who is super social, funny, joking about anything. I have a hard time to pass in the happy social mood sometimes and I want that to be easy, effortless.  


Nighttime:

Girls feeling more comfortable around me, I feel more open to people in general, I feel more relax, and slightly more happy. A girl rested her hand on my shoulder while crossing path in a club, it never happened to me, it's like she trusted me, girls are usually avoiding every kind of contact in a club and it was the beginning of the night, she wasn't drunk either.
A guy touched my hair playfully in a dance class, a first too, it seems I'm less threatening. Also one cougar wanted to dance with me at the beginning but we couldn't at the beginning of the dance class, it's like she jump on me but didn't realized it. I got an invitation from a good looking girl for a “couple dancing class” next Sunday.
Also it seems I was so open that I maybe shared too much of what I know to my friends, fear seems lessened and I care less about hiding who I am.
No obvious attraction for now.  


Details:
I drank one beer and a friend offered another, he forced it on me as I didn’t want, I shouldn’t have drank that one.

Day 2:
10/28/2017
­

Dream, can skip:
I dream I was lost and couldn’t use google map, there was a lot of trip with my car.
There was a dream in a concert, they were shy and couldn’t sing in front of everyone, so they draw the curtain and sang behind it. After that they got a lot of success but not before.  

In town with friends, Can skip:

So I went in town to see some friends and do some errands. One of my friend bring up at some point that I must have a lot of girls. It’s strange because he never said that to me even when running DMSI. I remember I had another friend who said something similar when I was using SM3 stage 1.
We talked about sex and girls a lot, like we are used to do. We often talked about our sexual adventure but he never said once that I must have a lot of girls running after me.
Then 2 hours later he said it again, like I was hiding something behind his back.
I noticed a few girls looking at me but nothing compared to DMSI for now.
I still feel more relax but I’m getting use to it so I don’t notice it that much anymore.

Day 3:
10/29/2017

In the dancing class, Can skip:
The woman who invited me as it was a couple class at one point kind of complain as she thought we weren't going to switch partner and that she would stay with me. So when the teacher said go back to your partner she came in my direction instead of going toward the guy she had to dance with. I thought we weren’t going to switch too but it was better like this actually. And curiously I danced better with the one that was less pretty. There is this super curvy blonde, amazing body but her personality is rather sluggish, slow type personality like my GF actually. The one who invited me is a  pretty brunette, a bit too thin for my taste but she has pretty face with light eyes but her behavior is a bit too masculine. The least pretty made a comment about me, she said my face is very expressive, the way she said it she likes that a lot.
I don’t know if it’s me or WM2, it’s probably both. She invited me too actually but I was already taken, it was too late. She was very disappointed about that it seems, so much that she didn’t invite the other guys. I’m pretty sure we all thought we weren’t going to switch partners and I think she didn’t want to stick with another guy than me. Thanks to another guy who came alone her cousin told her to come and she came.
After the course I went to buy some bread, I forgot I didn’t have enough for money for the stuff I ordered, and I said I will take only half as a result, but the woman offered it, she asked me how much I have and she said it will be enough. It was only 2 euro but a nice gift still.
I didn’t notice anything new about my behavior, I feel peaceful, carefree and relaxed.

Day 4:
10/30/2017

Day 5:
10/31/2017

In the dancing class:
Not much happened, the sexy blonde looked at me a bit more it seems. After the class I hang out with a group of friends. There was a girl staring at me and checking me out on the side, she was quite bold about it as she didn’t hide it at all. The waitress was too nice and looked at me very deeply in the eyes, it seems a bit too much to be normal. I talked with the sexy blond while dancing with her, conversation was better and more fluid. She seems more comfortable with me. She told me she has suffered depression and that she skipped school. I didn’t notice anything as she seems normal. Conversation with girls seems easier and more natural.

Day 6:
11/01/2017

11/03/2017

11/04/2017

11/09/2017:

11/11/2017:

11/12/2017:

This is not my complete journal as some details are not not authorized here. Maybe I will post the complete one in the other section of the forum if it's ok.
That's why some dates are empty.

Day 17:
I had a lot of dream in which I had sex with girls I know, my ex girlfriend was chasing me, I had sex with her I enjoyed it a lot. My ex dance class teacher was seducing me while her man wasn’t there. The other dream I don’t remember well but I remember a lot of sex related dreams here and there, some with stranger girls, some with people I know that are sexy.

Day 26:
Women magnet effect is subtle for now, I notice some attraction but it’s not all over the place.
I dream that I make the move on a girl at a dancing class. She was happy about it and kiss heavily on a couch. Later she ask me to kiss her again while she went home like she wanted to be my girlfriend, I told her I thought she got enough of that previously.

Day 32:
Recently (1 week) I noticed an increased amount of women looking at me. Last Friday and Saturday while going out I noticed more women showing sign of interest. A beautiful blonde I talk to regularly at my dancing class had a hard time talking with me, she was hesitating/struggling, and she never did before, it’s like she wasn’t at ease and she should be by now. Also my “GF” behaved differently too, more cuddling loving type behavior.
I feel very lazy to report right now, I don’t feel that much interest to the pretty girls in my dancing class, I still want them but I also realize that they may not be what I really want. For example with one blond or cute brunette I could talk to them on facebook right now, it’s almost effortless yet I’m not interested to do it, I have been pretty busy with cryptocurrency so this could explain why.
I get angry very easily since about a week or 2, in my dancing class there is a few guys I have a hard time no showing my contempt for them. I was talking with a friend of a friend last Saturday near a club, I really wanted to say to him how pathetic his behavior is, such bad belief he had on girls was making me go crazy, after about 10 minutes I left with another friend.
In that state I have a hard time controlling my impulse, it feels similar to SM3 actually or DMSI in one version I felt very badass.
I almost forgot another girl, nice pretty girl called me “cowboy” while I was leaving the dancing class. She was with her friend and wanted to talk, she noticed my vibe and that’s why she called me that, I do walk differently since doing WM2. I also invited 3 of those girls in that dancing class to a party every week, I will see what happens about that in the coming weeks. I know one of them is interested since about 3 month ago,her interest didn't drop even while on MLS.

I'm on Day 18 of Stage 1 and for the last few days I've been experiencing horrible rage, depression, worthlessness, panic, fear, and anxiety. Did you ever suffer through any intense negative emotions during Stage 1 of WM?

I like your journaling it is honest

editing

(11-27-2017, 02:23 PM)kalmah0804 Wrote: [ -> ]I'm on Day 18 of Stage 1 and for the last few days I've been experiencing horrible rage, depression, worthlessness, panic, fear, and anxiety. Did you ever suffer through any intense negative emotions during Stage 1 of WM?

Nope, nothing intense. Some little negative emotions but could just be normal life.

Stage 2

Day 3:

WM2 vibe is not as strong/dark as SM3 but I still feel super angry. Things that would normally be just a little upsetting I still think about it for weeks. It’s driving me crazy, I’m a very calm person usually, I don’t get upset very easily, I have a very high tolerance for hardship. But under this influence which seems very similar to SM3 I get upset very easily. There is a girl that have a not open minded philosophy about how the world should work, I’m getting to know her more and I have a hard time not showing my angry feeling toward her as she is very disrespectful without knowing it. I don’t even want to talk to her anymore, it’s disgusting me. Intellectually I know it’s not really her fault or that there is bigger scheme behind all that. But I can’t let go of all this rage building up. I have seen this king of behavior before and I know there is no way to get around it, only way is just to ignore them, which make me go even crazier as I know I can’t do anything about it, I can only wait, and my patience is near zero.

****************:
Death of johnny, learned who he was. Problems finding a reliable pool for ETN. Trying to buy IOTA.

Day 6:
********* bought some Tron around 0:50pm

***********************. I went to a dancing class of 2 hours at 7:30pm, there wasn’t a lot of people but I had a lot of fun. I made some jokes with the dance teacher. Also one girl seems quite enamored by me as she went to ask me out of nowhere what I wanted for a drink and then later she went to take a chair for me to sit, her friend was surprised by her behavior.

Then I went to a club. I didn’t notice much at first, I thought maybe I was wrong about this ***************, “maybe it won’t be as great as I thought” I said to myself. Then a half drunk cougar came to my table (I was alone eating on a table) she asked me if she could have some fries, she said she was super angry ( she just wanted to talk with me) I gave her some fries, we talked a bit and she kissed on my upper cheek heavily while she said we will see each other on the dancefloor, she was quite interested it seems. I ignored her after that but I noticed she was looking at me from far away.
I went on the dancefloor then, I was feeling proud and confident, I have been that way for at least 3 weeks now. I noticed some women looks but nothing out of the norm I could pinpoint yet.
Then later as the alcohol flowed more into the girls veins things started to happen. I think the first obvious one was a group of blonde girls,partying hard, a bit drunk but not wasted. I came to dance near them, but not completely close. 10 seconds later one of them grab me me from behind to dance, I dance a bit with them but I expected nothing from them,( a bit too young and too crazy)
Then I moved to another place and one girl caress me on my spine with her finger very sensually, I look back to see who it is, and I see a girl looking at me with a big face saying “I’m trying very hard to seduce you”. I look at her proudly (raised eyebrow) then I ignored her as she wasn’t attractive enough. Later on another part of the dance floor a black cougar was staring at me with the same kind of seducing look. Later when I saw them again she did it again, and her friend too, it was around 3 of them I think looking at me directly. I also noticed some pretty girl being bothered, and turning shy and timid when I was there.
There was a very beautiful blond by most standard, but cold type, when I was looking at her at the beginning of the night I didn’t see her once looking at me but maybe she hid it very well. But while dancing I caught her looking at me from far away, she was surprised and tried to hide it.
Also later while sat and talking with a friend a friend girl came to say hi and talk with me, while all this happened I noticed in my side vision that this cold type girl had an emotional reaction, is this jealousy ???, that’s cute.
There was also 2 nice girl being interested in me but there were with a group of jealous male friend trying to protect them from the “threat” that was me.
There was another pretty girl, she didn’t look at me directly but she was getting near me on purpose, putting her hair on my face, and touching me too much as she passed near me to see another of her jealous male friend. I think she was very interested but her male friends were too jealous for her to show any direct sign.
This was a fun night, I don’t think I ever got this level of direct approach from girls before in a club. There were 2 very obvious one, the group of blond directly dancing with me while I did mostly nothing but just go near them. And this alone girl directly touching me seductively.
It’s only the beginning of stage 2, and it’s already better than SM3 to me, even the latter stage of SM3 didn’t produce that kind of obvious seduction. I feel much better too, there is too much to describe but I can express my emotions more naturally with my body language, face expression, etc.

I'm really glad I'm not the only one experiencing strong bouts of anger on this sub. The way everyone talks about this sub, I really thought it as just gonna be like 6 months of straight good vibes and positivity, but no, so far I've experienced a fair bit of anger and sadness, just like normal resistance. I definitely do get days of pure positivity and sexual attraction, but the anger is very real on this sub, just like in AM6.

Yep the anger was there for me too. From what I remember it was kind of similar to AM in that it was anger towards society, feminism and stuff that is attacking men.