Subliminal Talk

Fencing huh? How is it? How do you get into it? I'm always looking for new hobbies =)

Ryan

Fencing is a decent sport. Form and delicacy is stressed to the extremes, although it is fun bouting with others. I had to select a P.E. credit for this semester, and thought trying something new would be interesting. I must say my footwork and balance have improved significantly.

This week has been great and a nightmare all at once. I had to visit my doctor today to get sleeping medicine. I am having a nasty case of insomnia lately. Walking up at 4:00pm during school days is not helping me either.

The nice thing is I feel like I am finally pulling myself back to acceptable state. My biochemistry or mindset must have been doing something right today. Everywhere I went, women were flirting and being far nicer than ever to me. This also got progressively better throughout my day. I hit this outstanding connection with this gorgeous nurse taking my blood, which I have never done before. She was a few steps down from my dream girl, but her personality was off the charts. I honestly do not see how her and I were laughing and having a good time while she was draining me dry XP

So far no signs of my perfect job, but my thought process has took magnificent leaps. These are some of my exact thought throughout the day...
-(Driving by what seemed to be a man in his fifties holding a sign for Little Caesars Pizza)
"Man, I wish everybody could have their perfect job like I will"
-(Thoughts about future) "I have no idea what lays ahead of me, but with my perfect job my opportunities will be unbounded."
-(Questioning the subliminal) "How will I get my perfect job if I don't know what it is? No worries, it will show up soon enough."

The rest seemed to echo a matter of when and not if. I am further convinced that I will have my perfect job as soon as I tie up some loose ends. I even thought about types of job. A job is not limited to any company or boss. I could be in the performing arts, in corporate, salary base, hourly, or by whatever means.

My sleep with this medication has been spectacular. I feel completely rested, energized, and all systems functioning at far greater levels. Except for tonight... But that is not important.

You also have subconscious wants that you are unaware of that I believe deep down is what you want to do with your life...however, I would imagine it coming to the surface shortly? During Sex Magnet for some reason I kept having crazy days thinking about what I wanted to do with my life, where I was going, etc. etc. and random things I used to be interested came up that I reconsidered.

Ryan

I would like to find away to find out what they are =P lol. Only two weeks have past. Shannon mentioned that it may take two-four months, which I am am thankful to have with low stress. I am getting that like there is no tomorrow. I feel very torn between my potential outcomes. I would like to live in so many places, but each take a considerable amount of adjustment time. I also want to enlist in unending amounts of activities/groups, but I am not very sure where to start and when I will have free time for them.

In addition, I am having very bizarre, lucid dreams. 50% reflect my desires and the rest I do not have words to describe or understand. The strange part is my dreams are becoming so life like (with the exception of pain), I will literary wake up and be puzzled how I went from location X to my bed. I just wonder how I can take instant manifestations from my dreams and hyper-speed my conscious attraction.

I have been thinking a lot about my ex-girlfriend. I miss the happiness she brought me, but her jealousy and bitterness made her and I fight a lot. I am pretty sure I saw her today. I want to move on and find another girl for however long I am here, but I think part of my mind is dwelling in the past :l

Before you say just let go... how can you do that without blocking out any of the good times if possible. I would like to keep some of the good moments, and I have grown from the others. What would be the best way to go about this consciously because my sub queue is fairly long at the moment =P

You don't need to forget the good times but forget the old times. You can understand they made you not enjoy the relationship and forget about it because you only deserve the best. It's not easy and usually takes time like everything else.

Quote:Before you say just let go... how can you do that without blocking out any of the good times if possible. I would like to keep some of the good moments, and I have grown from the others. What would be the best way to go about this consciously because my sub queue is fairly long at the moment =P

Don't forget the good times but forget the bad times.

I love the good memories I had with the girls I've met in my life and even though the person have caused me pain, I still treasure and am grateful for those amazing moments...

the key is to not obsess about it but just be grateful and happy about the great memories....

Learn what you can from your experiences, and then foster gratitude for the lessons they taught you, allowing you to improve yourself. Then let them go, and move on. It allows you to circumvent negativity and self destruction, while moving much faster in life to the good stuff.

I am getting there slowly. I have been flustered about everything. I don't want to call it soul searching or trying to find my identity, but I am trying to create the perfect version of myself with the least amount of drawbacks that also don't interfere with my moral code. This process has been fairly difficult, and I have been very distracted.

I desperately want to move somewhere to the East; China, Japan, New Zealand, South Korea, or Australia. I have no idea how I will get there, but I have a feeling those are good spots for me. As far as perfect job... I am clueless. I have a few ideas, but no idea how I will make the income I desire or how to make some sub-par skill into expert level.

I am contemplating switching to absolute confidence for two months then get back on board of Perfect Job. I do not feel confident. I feel like I have to combat insecurity and neediness here and there. Unshakable confidence would be nice. I still have nine months of time before I make any big decisions. That gives two months for absolute confidence and two to four months for perfect job. Then I have three to five months for whatever.

The past two months I have developed solipsism. I am not sure how, but I just learned what it was today in my philosophy class. In a way, it makes using the law of attraction basic and easy, yet it is weird to think about living beings. That + LoA + Metaphysics and quantum physics = my mind in a fog. This may be from loneliness, I haven't got out of the house that much lately. I am starting hibernation slightly early =P

My insomnia still has a slight grip on me. Despite the fact I have missed 80% of my morning and afternoon classes I am passing with A's and B's. I do not see why colleges use memory based learning. I use holistic which works like a charm for me. Even if I forget the information, I usually have several other references to back me up.

My dreams are bizarre as of late. Extreme vivid pictures sporadically manifest in a chaotic manner. Some of which interact with each other, while some fuse into new images. This happens even during my Timeless Oceanic Meditation.

Confidence is gradually rising and pools of aggression are flooding my sensory. Intimidations are now challenges.

You can use ASC with MYPJ, you know...

(10-17-2011, 11:01 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]You can use ASC with MYPJ, you know...

Yes, I am aware. I would like to have the full effects of each one at a time.