About me : I have been doing subs for a while so I see results quickly , previous to this I was doing maximum learning speed so I could learn faster stupid adhd.
I been following the pick up scene for a long time so my personal beliefs and some that I added to it are pretty solid.
Body language previous to am solid.
Socializing not the greatest I get kind of lazy listening and talking to others , I used to go out alone I eventually plan on doing that again.
Working out - I been doing insanity for about six months but I recently stopped got lazy and I usually avoid the gym ; but I have a membership im going to see if I can get motivated to go for at least 20 minutes and build up from there.
I have a woman I live with who I have a child with but I told her from the beginning that I didn't want to be in a relationship with her or anyone lets see how that ends.
Eating habbits - Decent but not great
Day 1
I don't think I missed anything if I did I will write back , but as far as today goes I feel good and a bit tired .
I wanted to write more but I don't what else to write so il update when I feel big changes or after I have an interesting day.
Day 7 - I feel pretty confident and I been rubbing off on some of the people I hang out with ; I also feel more comfortable around people and free to express my mind . I noticed that I don't laugh at peoples jokes or smirk like I use too if I don't think its funny like many around me do and I think it may be im getting more used to more social tension. Some guys were staring at me as I was coming out of a walgreens and I was ok with it someone needs to be in the spotlight.
If anyone who reads my journal can give me some more info on PSTEC that would be great, I am trying to add that to my lifestyle as well but I don't know if it works with AM since I don't know if a hypno session would affect Am , I believe not but idk.
Stage 2 day 35
Summarizing stage 1 just cleared some negative crap that have accumulated over time ; improved confidence also I stopped suppressing myself in order to accommodate others. I had this belief that I was intimidating others because my body language is so strong , I no longer care though.
Since I started Am I have been going to the gym a lot more , in fact when I don't go I feel like I am sabotaging myself from success.
Eating habits are improving a bit I have added more fruits to my diet.
So far what I have noticed from stage 2 so far its just random outbursts and my voice is getting a little louder could just be me overthinking though.
Stage 3 ( Day 6 of stage 3)
I am interpreting this stage as me being honest with myself and those around me and a balancing of my ego.
For example in day 2 of stage 3 I called out one of my supervisors on her behavior , she was talking down to me and those around her.
It pissed me off she was talking in this condescending tonality and as if I was retarded and stupid.
I called her out on it 2 times that day. I told her to work on it , today she seem like a better person I can see it in her facial expressions.
Also it feels like im doubting myself? wtf? im angry most of the time.
I was at a wedding on Saturday the 18th small wedding but fun kids were all over me , I was getting stared at a lot . Lol .
Most ppl seem pissed at me I wore shades in the reception room , not as if I was better the anyone but to me I feel like my eye contact is extremely powerful so it was my way of toning it down.
When it was time for the toast one of the grooms daughters didn't know what to say and I blurted out say something honest from the heart kind of like when owen Wilson said something similar to Claire from wedding crashers.
That's what I been noticing just transforming into a more genuine person and ask people for the same.
Also picked up a new habit. Tapping that's right , lol.
I plan on becoming a ( Tap Master)
Stage 3 Day 20
Prior to this day i almost got fired too for sexual harassment, i think it was like day 13 or 14 i downloaded a pamphlet on that ; anywayz one of the girls i flirted with got mad at me because i called her out on leading me on even though she has a boyfriend and i just wanted her to be speak the truth to me , i think her ego just couldn't let that go regardless im ok for now and will be leaving this job eventually. Because i was thinking if i don't take action now i will be stuck in this place for a long time and that's not what i want , which brings me to one of my future subs find my PERFECT JOB , and i shall stack that with Base see where that takes me its far away yet but an idea i can reflect on when the time comes.
Im counting down to stage 4 , 12 days. Anyways I feel great , extremely genuine like a brand new person. I was reading another post from someone that had depression and that was what I was experiencing subconscious resistance but I bypassed it all is good for now.
I had this feeling of going out to the bars I haven't been out in a while any who I was experiencing this intense sadness because I was feeling like everyone around me was stabbing me in the back. I called people out and learn to just accept things and I forgave them.
Do I plan on hanging out with them all the time , maybe , maybe not but what I do know it was just me accepting human nature and people. Can i forgive everyone what am i a priest? Still working on that.
As far as anger goes im in better control at least that's what im thinking as im writing this.
On a side note I messaged an ex FWB , I told her that I miss her which I do. In stage 1 I felt she was manipulating me so I needed to let her go, also I was expecting more from her but I killed those expectations I guess I was too attached which is ironic for me. But I let go of that. Considering she doesn't owe me nothing plus when you love someone you just accept that you have to let em go , sooner or later because the wanting to posses is just a way to control and fear of letting go.
So what I realized is that I don't want to be in any committed relationships right now .i think i mentioned that before , I don't want any one feeling like they need to posses me , because i don't want to do that to anyone and i think a lot of people do that ; Btw. In general I feel great , more GENUINE and CONGRUENT. Im working out 3 - 5 days a week which is awesome too. My diet still sucks need to work on that for the long haul.
Long term goals
Achieve a high level of spirituality and understanding of life.
Master a style of martial arts , although I want to be a better person and individual along the path there will be disagreements and because I realize most people are not masters of their emotions I need to take precautions , so understanding and practicing martial arts is on my to do list .
I also choose to do SM3 next and that is all for now Congruency + Genuine = Manly im sure theres more to that equation buts that it for now.
On a side note does AM6 have the script develop an aura of sexiness?
Day 28 quick brief
Dammm I just had a bunch of awesome updates , posting of my phone and just delete lol. F*** it. Il keep it short. Started talking to FWB after brushing my ego aside . It's been a week since we started talking again. She's was blowing me off around stage 1 so i shut her down for a bit until recently we had a heart to heart truth for truth on Saturday night. We also had some great sex i ejaculated 5 times . One thing that Pisses me off is when she told me her ( confession) I didn't judge her at all. But when I told her that I have a daughter she judged me hard core for not telling her. The reason being is that I wasn't ready to tell her just yet since I'm living with the mother either way I let her know about my life and how much i care for her. I'm noticing the Alpha power expand from noticing people's insecurities to my responsibility burden , it seems being alpha Is a job In it self. That's all for now
In your previous post, you mentioned that you wanted to do the attract your perfect job subliminal stacked with BASE. Both are 5G subs, and neither can be used with anything else... just FYI. If you do a 5G, that's all you can run at that time.
Alpha would have made it clear from the get-go (or at least, very early on) that he had a kid, and was living with baby mama. The reason you didn't was fear of something to lose. I have found that being blatantly honest whenever possible, and letting the chips fall where they may right off the bat is a very good policy. You'd be surprised how many women come back to being interested after they get to know you when you do that. You can end up with multiple simultaneous girlfriends AND lovers at the same time, who all know about and are even friends with each other, that way. That's because they will develop trust for you, knowing they will get the truth from you if they ask, and that allows her to let down her guard a lot more than she would with other guys.
Trust is everything. Unadulterated, continual truth leads to trust. And IDGAF detachment leads to being able to blast people in the face with the truth, because there is nothing to lose by doing so. Owning yourself, your situation and your choices, beliefs and actions is the way of the alpha.
(11-11-2014, 10:18 AM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]I have found that being blatantly honest whenever possible, and letting the chips fall where they may right off the bat is a very good policy. You'd be surprised how many women come back to being interested after they get to know you when you do that.
^^I know that if I'm honest and they get to know me, it'll be alright because I've still got a lot more to offer even without exclusivity (and, in fact, I can offer more this way b/c I'm living the way I want to). And yes, honesty build trust and enables one to be open. The fear I still have around the issue is that I think if I lead with that, they assume all kinds of things about me based on their previous experiences with other people and media conditioning, and not take the time to get to know me further, which would eventually reveal that I am, in fact, "a good guy". And if I did want an exclusive relationship, I wouldn't lead with that on a date either, so why should I with the opposite? I'm guessing the right moment to bring it up is when it naturally comes to mind.. thoughts?
Sorry for sidetracking Jackpot. Its a general issue, though.
It requires that you balance common sense and discretion with your honesty, but you must be honest. Whenever I have had multiple simultaneous girlfriends, I always managed it by telling the first one up front, that others will be along eventually and that if that's not cool, she can be just friends with me. But I don't say that until we are on the verge of a relationship so she knows me a bit better than "Hi! My name is Shannon!" Likewise, whenever I meet a second, or third or fourth or whatever, and she expresses interest, I tell her, "Look, I appreciate your interest and I like you too, but I need you to know, I already have 1/2/3/4/whatever girlfriends, and if you're willing to be the next addition, that's cool, but otherwise we can just be friends." Again, I wait until she knows me well enough to be able to decide from a point of view of some understanding of who I am and what I have to offer, instead of just a blind, ignorant knee-jerk reaction.
But allowing it to go too far, you'll start losing trust when you reveal the truth. The best revelation point, then, is after she has some understanding, but before she would lose trust if you told her. Always use the truth as a way to enable her to make informed decisions, and let her decide what she thinks and wants from there.
(11-12-2014, 10:20 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]It requires that you balance common sense and discretion with your honesty, but you must be honest. Whenever I have had multiple simultaneous girlfriends, I always managed it by telling the first one up front, that others will be along eventually and that if that's not cool, she can be just friends with me. But I don't say that until we are on the verge of a relationship so she knows me a bit better than "Hi! My name is Shannon!" Likewise, whenever I meet a second, or third or fourth or whatever, and she expresses interest, I tell her, "Look, I appreciate your interest and I like you too, but I need you to know, I already have 1/2/3/4/whatever girlfriends, and if you're willing to be the next addition, that's cool, but otherwise we can just be friends." Again, I wait until she knows me well enough to be able to decide from a point of view of some understanding of who I am and what I have to offer, instead of just a blind, ignorant knee-jerk reaction.
But allowing it to go too far, you'll start losing trust when you reveal the truth. The best revelation point, then, is after she has some understanding, but before she would lose trust if you told her. Always use the truth as a way to enable her to make informed decisions, and let her decide what she thinks and wants from there.
Thanks for your input Shannon , lion - king and anyone else in the future. I agree . Its like revealing your hand to someone either they choose to go with you or not. Another concept would be something like a ring , would the woman prefer a genuine diamond or non - genuine diamond and from this concept im withdrawing love , the power of her choice is based on nothing but choice itself.
^^I know that if I'm honest and they get to know me, it'll be alright because I've still got a lot more to offer even without exclusivity (and, in fact, I can offer more this way b/c I'm living the way I want to). And yes, honesty build trust and enables one to be open. The fear I still have around the issue is that I think if I lead with that, they assume all kinds of things about me based on their previous experiences with other people and media conditioning, and not take the time to get to know me further, which would eventually reveal that I am, in fact, "a good guy". And if I did want an exclusive relationship, I wouldn't lead with that on a date either, so why should I with the opposite? I'm guessing the right moment to bring it up is when it naturally comes to mind.. thoughts?
Sorry for sidetracking Jackpot. Its a general issue, though.
Yea the right moment to bring it up is when you choose to become vulnerable. Vulnerability is strength that is perceived by many as a weakness. In my case scenario I decided that I wanted to express myself and say hey , I miss you because I taught she was and is a worthy person to have around in my life. Since we hadn't seen each other in a while because of pride , ego etc... I was thinking if I want us to develop a genuine relationship I need to let her know but in return I expect her to be vulnerable as well and not lie.
(11-11-2014, 10:18 AM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]Trust is everything. Unadulterated, continual truth leads to trust. And IDGAF detachment leads to being able to blast people in the face with the truth, because there is nothing to lose by doing so. Owning yourself, your situation and your choices, beliefs and actions is the way of the alpha.
I don't understand a lot of the abbreviations here on the forum , what is IDGAF ?
(11-13-2014, 02:51 AM)Jackpot_100 Wrote: [ -> ]Yea the right moment to bring it up is when you choose to become vulnerable. Vulnerability is strength that is perceived by many as a weakness.
Actually the way I've been going about it now is to be as vulnerable as I can right from the start. That's my "game" atm, only talking this way to girls I find really attractive and then being very open with that.
But this exclusivity-honesty issue is what breaks my open/honest/vulnerable "strategy", because that's not something I can be open with right from the get go. So after she gets to see who I am a little better, but the question is: is there a "moral limit" somewhere. I'd bet some would say its before sex, but really I think the getting to know each other only starts after that, when the pressure is off of her. That's the first occasion I think she might have a good feel of what I'm about, when we've typically seen each other 2 or 3 times. "When a relationship starts to form" feels like somewhere after our 2nd or 3rd hookup.
Its just that my upbringing is raising its head somewhat, saying that there might be a moral issue with that. There isn't for me, but I can't help projecting that there might be for some girls. After 1-3 hookups has been ok in the past, as in they've been ok with it and continued to see me. And I don't lie before that, btw, I just don't bring it up. Its just that when I'm so open about everything else and deliberately not bringing this up, it almost feels like I'm lying. I think they must see that I'm pretty open about sex, but still it bugs me.
Blackdragon advises placing hints that you're seeing other girls and delaying the actual verbals as long as you can and deflecting the first times she asks it, but I don't like it. I had one girl start to develop feelings for me, and when I told her I'm not looking for a relationship she said she knew that quite well, but that she still somehow made herself believe it might be happening. Haven't seen her since. And this was a girl who saw me with a few other women in clubs and knew our group of guys always talked to girls. Anyway, that creates internal conflict for me and takes the fun out of it.
EDIT: I think the most troublesome belief behind my moral worries is "I have nothing to offer (to women)". But I'll continue in my journal, go Jackpot!