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Well things are looking pretty good. I think my confidence is really starting to show in everything I do at a subconcious level. I do still have some anxiety on approaching women but If they approach me I'm perfectly fine. It looks like things will soon fall into place within the next month or two. My resistance in stage 2 is not much.. I have not been feeling great or amazing but more of just a neutral pleasant type feeling which is perfectly fine. I am feeling very lazy though and not driven.
I also had a weird dream which I will tell you about. I was out camping with my mom and dad which were not really my mom in dad. In fact they were a really alpha male and an incredibly gorgeous women but I guess they must have been married. Either way we were camping together and this part is quite funny.. I had to take a poop and we had this black balloon tub for pooping. and it was filled with poop. I got in and the the liquidy diaherra like poop was above my ankles thankfully i didn't smell anything. I only felt the nastiness of the poop and it didnt really bother me. I did my business then for some reason the poop tube pump busted (kind of like the mouth pumps on beach balls). Anyways all that poop started flowing down hill to our campsite and my tent was open so I was like SHIT. Either way I sucked it up and put my mouth around the poop covered pump and blew air back into that baby but then the world started to end or something. it was just a crazy shit storm with rain and poop and gusts of wind like 200 mph. either way i slid down to where my tent was and as I did one corner of the tent blew off of it's pitch. I fixed the pitch and connected it back to the ground. All this time I didn't know what happened to the other tent or my "mom and dad". Nor did I really care. then I woke up after I pitched my tent.
I think If I really disected this dream up into parts I could figure out what it all meant. but I think the jist of it is that I'm handling the shit storm in my brain pretty well and I am comfortable with it not putting to much thought on it and just letting it go about it's way... sound right? O.o
LMAO!!!
That was one funny story Spiral!
Have you been working on your Manifestor? I'm curious to see how the other testers are coming along.
(08-18-2010, 06:29 PM)K-Train Wrote: [ -> ]LMAO!!! That was one funny story Spiral!
Have you been working on your Manifestor? I'm curious to see how the other testers are coming along.
Heheheheheheheh
That is the best proof that when you do not care, s-h-i-t happens.
I want to make a quick update on how I actually feel. I feel very confident around people I already know and people I do not know.. in fact I am projecting very alpha type qualities however gazing into women's eyes I find hard to do. My confidence has dropped a little bit in that area and I started questioning myself while at the supermarket today on how women think of me but I am getting women to check me out all the time almost 100% time whereever I go at a subconcious level. My concious mind is just making me feel a little week I guess. so around new women I have some shy tendencies still.
And also my sexual arousal has spiked quite significantly. I've had to talk myself out of jerkin the chicken the last few days.
(08-19-2010, 03:08 PM)spiralout1988 Wrote: [ -> ]I want to make a quick update on how I actually feel. I feel very confident around people I already know and people I do not know.. in fact I am projecting very alpha type qualities however gazing into women's eyes I find hard to do. My confidence has dropped a little bit in that area and I started questioning myself while at the supermarket today on how women think of me but I am getting women to check me out all the time almost 100% time whereever I go at a subconcious level. My concious mind is just making me feel a little week I guess. so around new women I have some shy tendencies still.
And also my sexual arousal has spiked quite significantly. I've had to talk myself out of jerkin the chicken the last few days.
As a result of AM? I have some increases in libido, but interestingly, I feel repelled by porn.
And I even feel tendency not to masturbate too often, as if it meant I am giving some of my power away.
Spiralout, buddy, what happened to Cory Skyy's forum?
I started practicing Jiu Yang Shen Gong recently and part of this is I can literally never masturbate again. The thoughts that have gone through my head during this initial transformation are incredible. But they have an identical take on this in that you are giving away power.
Its been probably one of the most difficult things I've had to do in my life, but the results will be worth it once I can reclaim power over my mind with this constant tidal wave of chemicals and hormones attacking. My weightlifting has gone up tremendously, and my need for sleep has gone down an average of 2.5hrs a day.
(08-19-2010, 04:07 PM)subadmin Wrote: [ -> ]I started practicing Jiu Yang Shen Gong recently and part of this is I can literally never masturbate again. The thoughts that have gone through my head during this initial transformation are incredible. But they have an identical take on this in that you are giving away power.
Its been probably one of the most difficult things I've had to do in my life, but the results will be worth it once I can reclaim power over my mind with this constant tidal wave of chemicals and hormones attacking. My weightlifting has gone up tremendously, and my need for sleep has gone down an average of 2.5hrs a day.
Wow. Googling it like crazy.
I already absorbed one theory on how orgasming distorts your brain neurochemicals, lowering down your dopamine and serotonine for at least two weeks after orgasm. Or rather, making your brain less receptive to what amount of them you have available.
Spend some time practising Kareza with a German woman at that time.
But I love passionate lovemaking too much to go entirely for abstinence.
I'm doing Women Magnet. And I have no idea about CS's forum. I think he may be finally updating the whole site.
They don't promote abstinence, just elimination of orgasm. I read a study that showed an increase in hormone from sex with an actual women, and net decrease from masturbation. Not sure where to find it again.
That's very interesting. I'm going to look into it... honestly there was a point in time during my life (first and second years of college) where I only did it a total of 10 times or less. I need to get back to that pace or to none at all. I'm sure as soon as the women start flowing into my life it will be alot easier to hold off on this kind of thing. I think since I stopped looking at porn (must be at least 5-6 weeks) I've had that urge much more.
Well looks like stage 2 is hitting hard. this morning I woke up and my whole face and head hurt.. it's been like that the last couple of days but it's alright I just know it's working hard. I went to church today and I had some anxiety and as much as I tried to relax there was still a tiny bit of anxiety. I then ate with my buddy's in laws and it was his wife's mom, dad, brother, brother's gf, and my buddy. We all had a great lunch and I was very grateful for it and I was very polite and socialized alittle. I did feel a little resistance in socializing with the brother gf and my buddy's wife but It wasn't that bad. There was some silent awkwardness at the table but I didn't let it bother me cuz they are a quiet family.. however they didn't ask me any questions or really include me on conversation. Last time I was over I was the one doing most of the socializing anyways so they may have expected me to speak up some more but all I did was enjoy the food. I think that's perfectly fine... you know, you gotta enjoy something if someone else put so much effort into making it good. I just indulged in eating that scrumptious food and wish now I ate some more.
Either way I do feel anti social still but not around the people I know well.. such as work... it's not a problem but anywhere else I'm pretty reserved which isn't much different than before. I'm sure this will soon turn around withint he next month or two.
The good news, you're subconscious is almost ready to start accepting things and you're reality will be changing very soon! When I first started stage 3 I began to notice a change in my social life and became more social and an all around fun person (which I displayed some during stage 1), this time it was more natural. Now I'm 2 weeks into stage 3 and I'm getting my social life back in order and making reason to go out and do things on my own (store, lunch, tanning, etc.), my anxiety is actually clearing up completely! It's going to be more enjoyable very soon!
It seems that I've been posting alot of posts about my results into Ryan's thread haha but I'm going to have a quick update here.
I have definitly become more aloof lately so the neediness is going away now. However, the confidence is what's low right now. It's not too bad but it was lower yesterday than it ever has been. I remember I was up front talking to our front desk secretary where the hot high school seniors work and I felt my heart was racing for no reason at all. But I had asked my question to the secretary very confidently while I gazed into her eyes and I had no problems at all with that and it came out just fine. The whole time I was just a nervous wreck. It's really hard to explain but I think this is alot of what Ryan had experienced from stage 2.
also Today and the last couple of days I've been giving off the dickish vibe. Or at least I'm afraid I might be so people do seem intimidated by me right now. But it is proven to me that when I do talk with them or they talk with me that vibe completely changes. I think I'm just not as smiley as I was a week or two ago.
Man I'm so happy I got through stage 2 before school started, today I just realized how bad it is going to college with that anxiety popping up. Sure I've had it in the past, horrible anxiety, it was easier to control, however, on my old mindset because it was my 'reality' and any counter thought I had it was easier to accept, now when it comes from the subliminal, it eats me alive until the subconscious pushes it out, I think that's what make it's so difficult. Anyways, I remember going through all of those things. It wasn't until just recently in stage 3 I started to stop being so arrogant and a dick around others because I'm no longer battling myself so much that I can learn to relax and enjoy everything around me, including people. I was reading this in a book about women today, it's regarding periods but I think this is a great quote for us subliminal addicts as well
Oh and BTW, now you know what a woman feels like when PMSing!
"We are turning into robots, and the only time we seem to feel anything is premenstrually, when the tide cannot be held back and we release in a flood of emotion. Done this way, however, it's like throwing up. We have no control over what's coming up, but we need to purge. This volcanic eruption is a result of our constant repression, and it cannot serve or support our growth when it expresses itself in this way"
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