I was on vacation in Egypt last week. Internet access was bad, I only had the hotel wireless network, and it was too slow to play OGSF. I've missed an entire listening cycle.
It was a difficult and challenging week emotionally A lot of struggles in my relationship with my GF, I got triggered a lot and showed insecurity. I feltt my emotional wounds triggered hard.
I have this feeling that OGSF is able to bring a lot of feelings, emotions, wounds to the surface, but not quite succeeding in healing them. Perhaps increasing exposure at lower volumes would work.
I’m currently doing 5 loops US. Hybrid feels too harsh.
3 months on OGSF gone, 1 down to go. My next sub will probably be one of the following: LTU6, UH, E5.
Currently on 5 loops US, will increase to 6 next ON cycle.
5 loops US at 10/16 volume
I am starting to realize that OGSF is indeed effective at removing fear, guilt, shame, so much that I'm starting to become an inconsiderate a**hole. The thought of cheating or playing with a woman's feelings just doesn't make me feel bad anymore. I only seem to care about myself.
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Shannon Thoughts?
5 loops US at 10/16 volume
(06-15-2023, 06:40 AM)GreekGod22 Wrote: [ -> ]Tough times, but I am navigating through them with courage and less fear.
I've been having struggles in my relationship for the last couple of months. Hesitation, lack of initiation, lack of decisiveness and my girlfriend's behavior reflected this lack. Last night, she came over to my place, it was a good night, I was leading, persistent, we had sex. I acted like a man last night.
OGSF is also really making me more resilent and emotionally tougher.
Thinking of what should I run next after those 4 months. Options are: LTU6, E5, AM6 refresher.
But if I still see changes happening on OGSF, I will stick to it for longer.
Something positive to report. Today, I overcame my fear of talking with someone through a video call. Normally, this kind of situations would generate some anxiety, make me feel self-conscious and I would always avoid them if possible, outside work or job interviews.
Tonight, I initiated and had a video call that lasted 1 hour with someone in my personal life.
Nearing the end of this OGSF run, only one last ON cycle remaining.
5.11G subs getting too pricey for me, they are currently not an option. I was thinking of choosing one of LTU6, E5 or DMSI, but I might have to be tighter with my budget in the following months. I've been spending recklessly. In that case, I will run one of my previously purchased subs, to avoid spending new money. And that will be OF3 or UMSv2 or E3. I will soon decide.
I have to remind myself that healing comes in waves. There are times when you feel you're not making progress, but after a while it hits you: you're changing.
This is the end of my OGSF run, for reasons stated above. I've felt that it was effective in clearing out and reducing some fears, and I could benefit from more of that.
Results were more obvious in the 4th month.
I will use OF3 next, as I don't want to spend money on a new sub.